Huge confidence crisis - advice and help needed.

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Beatrice5

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Bought a mare 2 years ago not knowing she was pregnant. Backed her and rode her away and she was very calm easy and wonderful. Stopped riding her October 2009 as found out about pregnancy and we weren't sure when foal due.

Foal arrived in March 2010 and has now just been weaned. So I think right time to get back on. Grazed her in hand in our garden by the road today and she was spinning with every car that passed. She was never confident with tractors as we hadn't seen many but now she is very reactive to any traffic.

I keep my horses at home have no school so can't easily lunge before I ride and have no-one to nanny me riding out. Will do more in hand grazing to try and desenesitize but am begining to doubt my sanity wanting to get back on her.

She was very laid back and placid when I got her I guess due to pregnancy hormones but is now very active and loves to gallop around , leap in the air and parshall to lots of play rearing, bucking and generally leaping around. I was going to lead her out on the raod like i do my young New Forest and he is a star but she is proving to be a lot more to handle and is much stronger and bigger than him so I have decided that is not an option :(

What on earth do I do now....?

Caramel choc digestives and hot choc if you survived this far !
 
Bite the bullet. Tack her up, get a coupling and lead her out. Doesn't have to be long, if 10 minutes thats fine. Get a competent friend to accompany you both and to give encouragement and confidence.
Wear a hat & gloves, carry a schooling whip in case she swings out & go for it!
:)

Forgot to add, how they behave in the field normally has no correlation to how they behave under saddle, so don't worry if she behaves like a loon when turned out. What are you feeding her, how much turnout are all important factors.
 
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I would be tempted to do some work on the ground with her, so she understands about respecting your space. Some simple exercises with a headcollar and rope. So she walks when you walk, with her nose at or just behind your shoulder, stops when you stop without bumping or overtaking you and backs up willingly.

Try to ensure that you move her feet and she doesn't get to move yours. Start off in the field and then extend this work to the more tricky areas, such as near the road.
 
Lunge her in where-ever you can, be it her field, garden, etc. Get the fizz out of her, get her a bit tired and keep at it for a bit till she starts to settle and then think about ridden work again. Doesn't necessarily have to take her out round the roads, just a wander round your place if need be. I'm not one for doing more ground stuff than ridden, when it comes to roadwork anyway....safer on than off I say!

Or pay someone for a couple of weeks to bring her back into work fo you :)

You say the foal was weaned....how long ago...could she still be a bit 'on edge' from that?
 
Start slow (for both of you) get some good back up - trainer/instructor and friends and some rescue remedy!

And enjoy - it's meant to be fun! x
 
do you think that her behavior is because the foal has been weaned? my mare was a handfull just after weaning , she did improve and settle down after a while, is it an idea to spend a bit of extra time pampering her before riding ? be brave and dont give up we all go through things and usually come out on top !!!!
 
Okay answers to your questions:

Foal just weaned but gradually and they share a field but seperate by elec tape and elec and both very happy.

Other horses are 4 yo New Forest and the now yearling filly so I can't ride and lead :(

I will try some magic to settle her as it worked before.

I have done groundwork but think yes may well be sensible to do some more over again.

I am also a great believer in just jumping on and getting on with it as safer on than off but she just seems to have so much more spark about her now and is becoming very perky to handle when she used to be a dope on a rope.

I did think about the feed. She is on Alfa A oil - just finishing the bag then going onto normal Alfa as she needed bringing up as was quite low after the foal had sucked the life out of her. She is also just gone onto baileys conditioning cubes fro Stud mix so I would have thought she would be quieter if anything. She is just finishing off her stud balancer but I have vastly reduced the amount. She gets a scoop of molassed beet as I said sugar never used to affect her.

I think I will try and find an instructor to come out with me but don't know anyone local to nanny horse me which is my biggest need. I backed and rode her away without the requirement of a nanny before and she was such a lovely forward going easy ride but I am not getting those vibes now :(
 
I am just riding Dixie again having weaned and she is a bit bright!
The food shes on though is a hell of a lot, Dix would be a complete fruitcake on that, alfafa has always set her off, and sugar beet - like coke on children, and conditioning cubes are high in goodies too.
Dix is now on hi fi and normal high fibre cubes and ad lib hay and is piling on the pounds nicely. I would cut out everything -she will soon get fat in the spring.
 
Yes I do think I shall whack the feed back and switch to Hifi lite which is Willow and fillys and some hifibre nuts again for the tiddlers. Maybe cut the sugar beet out too, she does have ad lib haylage and I have just wormed them all so she is looking and feeling in tip top condition now - very shinny glossy coat and a sparkle in her eye :) I can really see the Arab blood shining through ;D
 
You could always get someone more confident to ride her a couple of times, or could you perhaps hire a box/trailer and hire an arena a couple of times, so that you could lunge first?

You sound like you have your head screwed on. I'm sure you'll be fine...x
 
Thank you for the vote of confidence :)

Box hire maybe an option to get the all well rehearsed at loading not sure if hire company would be too forthcoming as they have only ever travelled in a lorry and not sure how they would like a trailer ! Maybe a slightly less pristine one would be best ;)

I have just spoken to a local instructor who sounded very promising and she said she could hack down and nanny us but to definately go with the no hard feed for a few weeks and stick to ad lib haylage just while we get her back into the swing of things.

Phew - huge relief all this money and work it will be nice to get some pleasure from riding again :D

Fingers crossed - I'll keep you posted LOL New body protector on wish list and new hat !
 
Sometimes the wisest move is to step aside and let someone more experienced with youngsters (dont take this personaly ,there is always someone who is better at certain things)do the hard work. .Also provide you trust them ,dont watch. You must not learn to fear certain things either. Its always more scary watching than doing. I think teaching a horse about traffic is a bit of an art . For example when you hear a vehicle behind you ,slightly flex your horses head to the right (uk only:D). If he gets scared his quaters will swing out away from the road. Eventualy it becomes a conditioned reflex and they will always look to the right.
 
I had a similar problem and made the mistake of walking her up the road and got dragged up the road, I bought a book called 101 horseman tips from amazon and spent a lot of time doing groundwork with her to ensure that there was respect between the two of us, it took several weeks but after that the bond between us grew but we are getting their slowly but it really got me down and i got to the point where i wondered if it was worth it.
 
Ice can be complete nutter ont he ground, far safer on top! She is a mellow chilled out ride, I just can't always handle her comfortably on foot! If at all possible find space to lunge first. Be brave, I find magnecalm works really well.
 
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