I just wanna quit!! Long and ranty!

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Frances28

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I have that Sunday feeling peeps!

I live in the country in a gorgeous rented apartment with my wonderful partner. My horse is 10 minutes away on a fantastic yard and its all great. Up until a year ago (before I moved here) I was absolutely miserable and depressed - but my life changed this year - for the better.

Only trouble is, I need to get rid of the last problem. I work in London and travel 2 hours in for the privilege only to work for 8 hours with the biggest bunch of aholes in a job I absolutely hate and then travel 2 hours back to see my horse - for an hour before I have to turn her out.

I am sitting here thinking tonight - I want out - but just don't have the guts. Problem is I have been training for this job for 7 years. I just don't know what to do.

Do any of you guys feel like this or already done something about it?! ahhh!!!!! What do I do!? I just wanna be closer to home, no travel, near my horse and cook my partner nice meals. Am I mad !?!?!?
 
I live 10 minutes from where my mare is kept and work 15 minuted from home, wouldnt have it any other way
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Nope its a normal way to feel particularly on a sunday night.

You are very lucky, you live in the country, have a lovely partner, your horse is local and at a fantastic yard. You have been training for this job for 7 years and you have achieved your goal.

Look at the positives rather than the negatives.

Unfortunately, you are not the only person who works with aholes. I also have a hellish journey to make into work. 45 minutes crawling along the M8, millimetre by millimetre. If I go into work on a saturday, it takes only 10-15 minutes! It then takes me an hour to get from work to see my horse. My horse is lame and retired with arthritis and it takes me half an hour to get from the horse to home. Usually I am home by 8.15 ish. I leave the house at 7.20 am to go to work. I have also slipped a disc and recently my cat was pts.

Could you afford, financially, to leave your job and go to another? What job would you like to do? Do you like your job, but not the people? Could you get a job nearer to home?

Write down the pros and cons of your job and weigh up the benefits. If you decide to leave and can afford to and find the job of your dreams, go for it. Life is too short.

On the whole though, I would say you are doing pretty well and its just the sunday night blues.

Hang in there. We are all in the same posiiton more or less.

Hugs x
 
I am so with you on this one. I too have a 1hr 50 minute commute twice a day to London and a job that I loathe and have loathed for years. Big problem is its well paid and I can do it standing on my head. It pays for me to live in a nice house and have 3 lovely horses outside the door. Its too late and I have too big a mortgage to change/retrain. But are you? I know you have spent 7 years training for this job but take it from someone who has done a job they hate for about 2 decades and think on it. If you really hate it, is there something else you would like to do that would earn you similar money.

A compromise might be looking to see if you can do your job locally? Even if you still dont like it at least you would be able to spend more time doing the thing you love.

My plan is to save as much money as I can and get out that way. I am literally counting the days!!
 
Already done something about it - last year I gave up an extremely stressful and well paid job in a large UK bank which took the saying living to work to a whole different meaning and retrained as a primary teacher, which I love, less money but a happier, less stressful me who now works to lives and actually gets to spend time with hubby, horses, friends and family.

X
 
Sunday night blues, tell me about it! I was having bad feelings about my job, loved the people I worked with but the job just wasn't fun anymore. Then the bottom dropped out and a restructuring meant i was demoted and moved to a different location, and then passed over for another job with the same employer that everyone said I was a dead cert for. SO after 14yrs of loyality I thought sod it and in 2 weeks time I will be going to work in London for someone who wants me. I will have a longer commute and I will see a little less of george but hopefully my contentment will make it worth it (not to mention them paying me more and giving me a weeks extra leave!).

Good luck!
 
I am assuming you must do something like accountancy or Law? I gave up the big well paid job 3 years ago and although there have been times when I struggled I now have my lovely cottage in the country, horse at lovely livery yard and do contract work which is really well paid. I have taken the decision to work as hard as I can for the next few years, pay the mortgage off early and then I will have the option to do less stressfull work/work part-time etc. I have a friend who does contract work and works for 9-10 months a year, taking the summer off to compete. At the moment I leave for work at 5.45 adn rarely get home before 8pm but I see it as a means to an end and make sure I have my weekends free for the horses - and have the money to enjoy them more importantly! Sundays are always the worst, I know this week will be manic and then next weekend we are at Ascott BE on sunday and then have to drive to Southampton (120miles) for a meeting at 9am monday..... as I said before - a means to an end.....
 
Oh Frances28, you are not alone!

I left my job in december to get one closer to home and to horse and I hated it, I cried the 1st day and it didnt get any better.

I am now back in my original job and realise that it is not perfect, but it would be so much worse.

Remember the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence, its an optical illusion.

hugs x
 
I know EXACTLY how you feel. You are definitely not alone.
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I work sometimes 10/12 hour days in a job I actually love. THe problem is I work in a very 'corporate' environment and I absolutely hate it. 80% of my job is politics, all in meaningless company speak (bullsh!t bingo gone mad). What I really hate is that I am not going to make a difference working in this job.

On the plus side it pays me very well so I get to keep my 4 horses in oats.
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I would love to give it all up BUT I think you have to be very careful. I know for a fact that if I did I would be bored very quickly.

Could you look to work for a smaller company, nearer home?

Chin up & count your blessings
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Another one over here!

I work 60 miles away from home and always see my horse after work, who is about 15 miles from home. All in all I do about 130 miles a day and get home somwhere between 9-10pm when I finally have dinner.

I took the job when I was desperate several years ago and haven't found the confidence to apply for anything else. Keep saying, one day I'll find something closer to home, but never do anything about it.

Most of the time it's ok, but I do find myself in a viscious circle of constant tiredness. The later I get home, the later I go to bed, the harder is to get up the next day, the later I get to work in the morning, the later I have to work to make up the time and then the later I get to the boy after work and on it goes.

One day, we'll be in a house with a bit of land, ponies on site and working from home! This dream keeps me going.
 
I know how you feel!! I had a job I really hated, to the point that I was about to be off with work related stress again. Unfortunately I had 10 years' exp in that career & a ton of prof exams, so couldn't afford to retrain & start from scratch.

I took a chance & did an internal transfer, so I kept my salary, but doing something completely different, which I was soooo much happier doing. But it involved going to a different office which was a round trip of 140 miles in the car. I did it for a year, then we had a reorg, so I could work 4 days a week from an office 30 miles away.

Then I got made redundant but cos I'd worked my socks off, I then had the ability & experience to apply for jobs in the same field. I've been traipsing into London which is 1 1/2 hours each way since May 2007 & recently I've been feeling just like you. Tired, jaded, fed up with my house being a constant tip cos there's no time after the horses.

I've been looking for jobs nearer home, but then 2 weeks ago I found out that a) my manager, the head of compliance, is leaving b) I'm going to be taking over 1/2 his role & best of all c) in about 6 weeks, I'll be permanently working from home. So I get to keep my fat London salary but no more commuting or paying for season ticket!!!

So I've now got Nikita's dream of working from home, with the horses at home.

My point is that it *is* possible because I've done it, by a combination of luck & planning. You need to think about what you *really* want to do, & start setting up your stepping stones. Can you do a p/t course / distance learning? Can you do an internal transfer, get some experience in another field & move on? Can you do a secondment? Can you apply for similar jobs nearer home?

You really *can* do this - just go for it.

Good luck.

T xx
 
Sorry, bit late into this one...

I was travelling 1.5 hours a day (sometimes more) for a stressful but reasonably well paid job. I paid for my horse to be on part livery (she's retired, so didn't need to worry about working her). Didn't see much of my husband (he works silly hours too), got very stressed and depressed.

Ended up taking a month off sick with stress, before going back to work out my notice.

Now work 5 mins walk from home, in a no-stress, 9-5 job (even come home for my lunch). Horse is back on DIY, although I do have to travel 15-20 mins to get there. My day is perhaps a little longer, as I do the horse and get home before the rush hour kicks in, so I get up at 5 *yawn*. I'm happy, chilled, have time to do all the household chores, cook dinner, see friends.

If you can afford to change jobs, do it. Work out how much you need to earn each month, as a bare minimum, and start looking around. In the end, I only dropped £7k a year, and I save most of that by walking to work, having lunch at home (instead of spending £5 a day on a baked potato and a diet coke!) and looking after my horse myself.

Work to live, don't live to work - that's my motto!

Good luck
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Not mad at all - very sensible if you ask me.

I used to be in a similar position. I hated my job and used to start getting down about having to go in by Sunday lunchtime so it ruined my weekend as well.
They did a big redundancy programme and were looking for volunteers so I went. It was really scary at the time, but I'm now so much happier. Ok, so I earn quite a bit less now but I love my job and work with a great bunch of people. I even get flexi-time instead of being expected to work all hours without anything for it. I had to put my horse on DIY instead of part livery - but after the shock of our first winter I now wouldn't have it any other way. I can't understand why I didn't do something sooner!

If you are really unhappy in your work, figure out what you want from a job and look for something more locally that would let you have a decent quality of life. It is absolutely worth it!
 
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