I knew things were going too well ?

[Red-1]

A missed feed won't make any difference. Mine don't even get a bucket feed if they are good doers. I don't think anyone (apart from one person) feels that it was anything serious. Everyone makes mistakes and, from what I have read, I would be very happy for you to look after my horses. You always sound very considered, ask for advice, do your very best for Robin.

FWIW, I wouldn't go back to ride in a field again today, I would do something low key as you are likely to be bruised and stiff.

 

[doodle]

I just don’t want to teach him he can dump me and go home and get rewarded by getting his feed, hay and tucked up for the night.

Anyway I am not as sore today as I thought I would be. I am more emotionally bruised that it happened! I have not seen him yet as I had to leave my car at the yard and waiting for mum to give me a lift back up. A friend turned him out this morning, I expect that will be negatively commented on too.

I will have a wee ride in the school later.

 

[Upthecreek]

I have tried to refrain from commenting about the missed feed..... but I can’t. It’s not cruel to miss a feed, it would not have affected the horse one tiny bit. He will not have spent the evening feeling sad he didn’t get it. Horses do not do that. Equally if he had got the feed he wouldn’t have thought “lucky me I dumped her & ran home & still got my dinner”. Horses do not think like that either.

As for your comment elsielouise that “It’s never OK to allow your emotions to get in the way of your actions around the management of your animals and if you really can’t regulate enough to do so then you shouldn’t ride” that is unnecessarily harsh over a missed feed. Human beings go through all sorts in life and none of us is perfect. Sometimes our emotions will affect how we treat our family members, friends, horses, dogs. OP did not get a stick out and beat her horse, she just didn’t give it some chaff. Perspective required I think.

Also we are allowed to defend, agree, disagree, whatever. That’s how a forum works.

 

[Midlifecrisis]

At this time I’m not worried about Robin..it’s you K. I am so sorry to hear about this, be gentle with yourself, don’t over think things and I hope the aches and pains go away soon.

 

[babymare]

Kamikaze you had a nasty fall. Credit to you that you ensured Robin was settled for the night with his ad lib hay whilst feeling unwell before attending to you own needs ? Don't let someones negativity knock you. Blooming horses! They like to keep us on how toes hey? Just be careful and if you feel unwell at any time seek medical help. Concussion can be delayed and creep up on you. Keep doing the great work you do with Robin x

 

[laura_nash]

Lots of horses seem to be silly at the moment.

Agreed. My two are about the sanest, quietest pair of cobs you can imagine. When I turned them out yesterday, the youngster had a proper spook at a sheep and almost refused to walk past it and then my oldie (who I've owned forever and should know better) lost it in the gateway and tried to pull away before I took his headcollar off. Once order was restored and I'd let them go, instead of their usual head down and eat, they went charging round the field snorting and bucking like lunatics for some time. I did wonder if someone had slipped them something.

 

[Flicker]

I just don’t want to teach him he can dump me and go home and get rewarded by getting his feed, hay and tucked up for the night.

Horses don’t process information in that way. He would never associate not having his tea with chucking you off. Understand that you were upset and in pain, but by not giving him his tea you were in no way teaching him that his behaviour in the field was not acceptable.

Part of riding is setting horses up to behave as we want them to. Asking for a different outcome after Robin had twice demonstrated that cantering in the field was resulting in behaviour you were not happy with was just setting him up to repeat it - with the unhappy outcome you have experienced.

A different approach may have been to settle him in walk and trot, get some good work out of him and leave the cantering for another day. That way, he’s given you what you want: settled behaviour and responsiveness, and you’ve kept him focused and listening to you.

Unless you are a very, very competent rider who can cope with escalating behaviour, it’s always preferable to knock it down a gear if your horse is acting up.

Every day is a school day. We’ve all been where you are. What makes us better is having the self awareness to reflect on what’s happened and what we’d do differently next time.

Hope you’re not too sore and please get checked over.

 

[Spanny]

Re. Concussions, my OH has had more than are healthy... He always says that one thing to watch out for is feeling particularly down and emotional for a few days afterwards - it seems to be fairly common. So, please be kind and patient with yourself. Don't try to do much right now either.

You and Robin will both be fine. Sending gentle virtual hugs.

 

[doodle]

I was trying to set him up to succeed by coming back to trot and not allowing him to bomb off. He knows he is not allowed to do that. We did 2 circles in total. And yes clearly asking for circles was the wrong thing to do. Also allowing him to speed up was not the right thing to do. I felt by circling and regaining control was better than a mad gallop. He has never done what he did before and I wasn’t expecting it.

So yep I totally messed up. I handled the situation badly and it went wrong. He has not wasted away last night from the lack of one scoop of chaff.

I’m beating myself up right now enough that I don’t need extra sticks.

 

[babymare]

Stop beating yourself up. Ok learn from it but blooming put your "self beating "stick away. We have all made mistakes and error in judgements. So understand what went wrong but stop being hard on yourself. You are both ok and that's what matters x

 

[Flicker]

No sticks from me, that was not the point of my post. What has happened has happened and you can’t change the past. You can, however, take hugely valuable lessons from your experience and both you and Robin will benefit as a result.

There is also no point in beating yourself up. You tried something, it didn’t work, you’re a bit sore but you and your horse both live to fight another day. Take the win, take the lesson, dust yourself off, tomorrow is another day.

 

[Winters100]

You have no reason to beat yourself up. The thing with these situations is that you can take away from it what you choose. You can either look at it that your riding went wrong, you had a bad fall, and then you regret not giving his chaff.... OR you can look at it that he was silly, as many are, the fall was nasty but no life changing injuries, you put him away and gave hay and everything he needs for a comfortable night and you have been brave enough to want to ride him in the school today. I am, of course, assuming that he has not faded away for want of a scoop of chaff!

To me you sound like a really good owner who is taking good care of your horse while working on the parts of his behavior that need correction. A bad day does not mean disaster, so chin up and be kind to yourself.

 

[doodle]

Thanks winters, just hard when people saying I handled it badly. I really thought I was doing the right thing in using a circle to regain control. Yo has said I should have just let him go rather than trying to slow him down. Er, no.

Today he is fine. He has not lost weight or anything from lack of chaff! He was perhaps slightly subdued. I rode in the school for 15 or so minutes just in walk and trot. He was super. Didn’t put a hoof wrong. I perhaps should have taken him for a short hack but that can wait. I am relieved that I got on and absolutely nothing happened and I think he is too he had lots of cuddles after and told he was good. So I think he genuinely did just boil over rather than deliberately decking me.

 

[Red-1]

FWIW, if I was on one who was trying to bomb off, and I had space, I too would have circled to re-balance and get control. If I got control then I may have continued with my original plan. I don't think you can be blamed for anything you did. Sometimes horses do silly, reactive things. You got back on and hacked home, made sure he was comfortable, even when you felt so grotty you couldn't drive home.

I am glad you had a nice ride in the school today.

 

[Winters100]

FWIW, if I was on one who was trying to bomb off, and I had space, I too would have circled to re-balance and get control. If I got control then I may have continued with my original plan.

I am glad you had a nice ride in the school today.

I also would have circled, and then if I am honest I would have been very pleased with myself if I had not got off! Appreciate that this is the worst thing to do, but it is soooo much easier to do the right thing when sitting at your laptop then when on a horse who has different ideas to you as to appropriate speed and direction!

 

[CanteringCarrot]

And we all make rational decisions after a nasty fall and a banged head do we?

I don't even need to bang my head in order to make irrational decisions ?


OP, you handled the situation like many would've. As others have said, horses are definitely feeling silly at the moment! Don't beat yourself up over it.

 

[atropa]

Hope you're feeling better today OP. You most certainly are not crap in any way shape or form. You did what you thought was best at the time to try and de-escalate the situation, and it didn't work, not your fault. Well done for getting back on in the school.
My two are quite strong and silly right now too, maybe it will put your mind at rest instead of worrying that R is sore somewhere knowing that so many other horses are feeling silly too.

 

[SpeedyPony]

I was trying to set him up to succeed by coming back to trot and not allowing him to bomb off. He knows he is not allowed to do that. We did 2 circles in total. And yes clearly asking for circles was the wrong thing to do. Also allowing him to speed up was not the right thing to do. I felt by circling and regaining control was better than a mad gallop. He has never done what he did before and I wasn’t expecting it.

So yep I totally messed up. I handled the situation badly and it went wrong. He has not wasted away last night from the lack of one scoop of chaff.

I’m beating myself up right now enough that I don’t need extra sticks.

Please don't feel the need to beat yourself up, one missed feed will hardly be noticed, particularly if it's just chaff. As for circling, it's something I think most people would have tried, sometimes what is a good idea one day will fail dismally the next, horse (and human!) emotions get in the way of a consistent response!
I'm sure we've all done something and thought I should have stayed on/got off/circled/pulled up instead, it's part of riding horses and what is appropriate today might not work tomorrow.
The main thing is you're both back safe and sound.

 

[Ceriann]

Hope you are feeling better. So sorry this has happened - have read lots of your posts and how well you’ve done with confidence issues. Horses are animals - sometimes they dont react as expected, whatever you try. Its not your fault. I’ve been there, know exactly how you feel - I was so upset when my mare dumped me twice in a lesson. I should have listened to her, trusted my gut - I didnt. We both survived, my irrational upset with her lasted a few days but she was oblivious. Be kind to yourself and try not to make it a thing for the two of you.

 

[Dave's Mam]

Hope you are feeling better.

 

[Lurfy]

You did the best you could at the time, many would have done the same as you. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, but we don't get to see how things turn out until they do. Now this has happened you may do things a bit differently if you find yourself in the same boat again. Live and learn, we all learn these lessons with horses. God knows I have hit the deck umpteen times over the years. Good to hear you are recovering well. Onwards and upwards now. Clock it up to experience and put it behind you.

 

[vmac66]

Hope you're feeling better today. As someone who also suffers with confidence issues well done for getting back on. Its silly time of year for horses. My instructor said my normally laid back mare was sharp last week on my lesson. Very forward, got the feeling she'd have bogged off given the chance.

 

[Trouper]

There is no-one on this forum - past or present - who has not done something stupid or forgetful at some point with their horses. You did exactly what I would have done - circling is my go-to manoeuvre to get back control of a horse whether I am on board or on the ground. At this time of year with cooler temperatures and an Autumn flush of grass, sometimes we don't know how our horses will react to it until we are outbound on a hack and committed and just have to deal with the situation. You will know next Autumn!!
Everyone has talked about concussion and it is important to monitor yourself and make sure you are OK this week. But, at the time, you were also suffering from shock and we so often underrate the effects that can have on our bodies and minds. Forget about a missed feed - in the grand scheme of things it is nothing. How you both pick yourself up from this is the key and it sounds as if you have re-connected with him well in the school already. My only recommendation at the moment is maybe to consider giving him a good lunge to take the steam out of him before you hack out again - it is a very useful tool to have in the box!!
New day - New week. All this is now last week's news so press on with confidence.

 

[southerncomfort]

Hope you're feeling better today OP. You most certainly are not crap in any way shape or form. You did what you thought was best at the time to try and de-escalate the situation, and it didn't work, not your fault. Well done for getting back on in the school.
My two are quite strong and silly right now too, maybe it will put your mind at rest instead of worrying that R is sore somewhere knowing that so many other horses are feeling silly too.

Oh yes! I just had to leap out of the way of my 3 who were galloping and bucking their way towards me. The last couple of days they've been absolutely full of it!

 

[Bernster]

On the feeling down/emotional, yes that def happened to me when I went splat recently (got bucked off big style and landed on my face!). Felt pretty despondent for a good few days and nervous when I got back on. Still not fully back to normal confidence wise so will take it slow. Look after yourself K.

In terms of how you dealt with it, I think that’s very tricky to gauge in the moment . I tend to try and do the thing I’m wanting to do, and have the horse do as it’s asked/told, rather than de escalate, but it’s a fair point to think about options and changing the question.

 

[Chianti]

I didn’t want this to turn nasty and it has. Yes he didn’t get his feed. I didn’t think missing one scoop of chaff would kill him. He still has ad lib hay as normal. I know I am crap and feeling it even more today. However his feed will stay reduced. Yes I should have fed him yesterday but was feeling ill and not thinking straight. I guess I should immediately sell him and not ride again.

If he had his hay I expect he didn't miss the chaff. Don't feel crap- horses are not machines and will do stupid things. My 13 hand pony gelding that everyone on the yard thinks is dead from the neck up, and down, nearly had me off today as we went down a track we don't do much and he saw some old concrete blocks stacked up in the field next to the fence line. Que a very quick about turn. To me you sound very brave - I would have headed for home after the first canter.

 

[doodle]

Hacked out today. Just down the back track and into the stubble field and round. We were both a little nervous and we stuck to walk and easing into trot and he was great. One spook at a pheasant which is fine. Feel a bit annoyed at myself for being a bit tense but we did it and it was fine and I want to do it again.