Ideas for teaching nervous 12yr old

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jumpthemoon

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Hi,
Does anyone have any ideas about what I can do with a nervous 12 year old to stop her from thinking that her horse is about to take off? She rides a 15.2 arab and because it's quite sharp (although lazy at the same time) she is constantly panicking that it's going to bolt with her.

When she panics, she tenses right up, comes out of the saddle and holds onto it's mouth for dear life, causing it to run off with her and she generally falls off (bails out) if she is on her own.

I've got her going nicely in the manege, but I wanted to give her a lesson in the field where there is a bit more room (to help with her riding out), so could do with some ideas if possible?

Thanks,
 
Hmm, can she ride anything else for a while - real, quiet, type and poss smaller? Sorry if this is obvious. Or, can she watch someone else ride the arab in the field, and see her having lots of fun? I hope it all works out.

I adore your siggy btw.
 
is it her horse? 15.2 is big for a 12 year old. Is she learning to ride? I would not put a child who is learning on a sharp horse and does she WANT to ride? I hope you work something out, if she breaks her confidence where's the fun?
 
is it a suitable horse to give her a lunge lesson on? if your in control of the horse she may not worry so much and start to relax and enjoy her horse more. only a tempory fix i know but small things can gain so much confidence.
when in the field keep things to walk and trot maybe use trotting poles dotted around the field like a mini course kind of thing so she has to concentrate on steering, keeping a rhythm.
also maybe you could play the traffic light game, (its good, honest
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) it is basically transitions and the instructor will shout out what gait/ transition they want the rider to do. this will show that she can control her horse by asking it when to go and stop even in a more open environment.
distracting the rider from what she is worrying about is going to be the key. gd luck i no how much hardwork it can be working with a nervous rider.
sorry my reply is so long
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I got an amazing book from amazon the other day called teaching children to ride - got some fantastic ideas.

Getting her to recite things to you like her times tables, lyrics from songs, nursery ryhmes (sp) etc - get her mind off riding and onto something else.

Set up cones/jump wings/ anything non spooky that she has concentrate on steering through - like a mini obstical course...

My mind is a little blank right now will think some more
 
Stick a neck strap on it and teach her to hang on to that instead of its mouth. Neckstraps are terribly undervalued IMHO.

Double edged approach - get on it yourself and teach it that a yank on the neckstrap means "slow up".
 
Thanks for the replies. It is her horse (although only on loan) and IMO is too big for her/too much for her but I've already been through this with parents/YO and they want her to work with it. So I have to make the best of a bad situation!

The horse is not suitable for lunge lessons - it has no schooling at all and is very unbalanced on the lunge.

The trafffic light idea sounds pretty good pancake - she does need something to take her mind off her fears and that could work well, I'll give it a try
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Breeze_mum - she desperately wants to ride and is frustrated by her nerves, but she can't seem to relax on board. It's very diffucult as the horse is completely unforgiving. The slightest tense moment and it is spooking/pulling/napping etc
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We have to work with what we have though unfortunately!

Twinkletoes - she's seen other people ride it and it didnt help. Just made her feel useless I think. There is another horse she could ride but I dont think it would help with her nerves on this one. Also, she doesnt want to ride another horse, she wants to ride hers. My siggy could do with updating really
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thanks though
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[ QUOTE ]
Stick a neck strap on it and teach her to hang on to that instead of its mouth. Neckstraps are terribly undervalued IMHO.

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Too bloody right. I get looked at gone out for riding with a neckstrap and telling those i teach to grab the neckstrap at appropriate times.

It might well backfire but I teach a ying girl who too was quite nervous and pony was difficult and Im really tough on her, ie. when shes worried pony might do something i tell her shes being daft and to get on with it! Like with a nappy or worried pony/horse - you would really ride it on to give it confidence, not sit there worrying yourself becasue that will only think it has something to worry about. Same sort of principle I reckon!
It really works in this case but obviously it might make things worse!

But yeah, couldnt agree more with the neckstrap, if its getting a sock in the teeth all the time its going to panic!
 
hellspells - thanks for that - some good ideas there! The times table one could work a treat
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the obstace course would help as well maybe - take her mind off things.

jemima_too - one step ahead here - I've already put a neckstrap on it but she won't hold it once she's taken hold of the reins - she won't let go. When she gets nervous she just pulls on the reins so she is almost standing up in the stirrups and then can't let go as she's not balanced and frozen with fear! poor kid!
 
Oh yes, similar to what somebody has also said, but Ten Green Bottles wrks wonders! You have to think more about what number bottle you're on than anything else! Bit difficult to teach somebody whose singing all the time though!
 
I'll have a look through the book tonight for other ideas.

From teaching someone just the same I know how difficult it is!
 
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Bit difficult to teach somebody whose singing all the time though!

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PMSL! At least with ten green bottles I wouldn't have to worry about her knowing the words!
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Teach her to ride in the school using only one hand at a time - alternate. You can do it by showing her how to hold the reins correctly in one hand and then doing "touch your nose", "put your hand on your head" etc. While she's getting confident steering with one hand you can teach her to keep the other on the neckstrap.

Have you taught pony that a good pull on the neckstrap means slow up?
 
Definately agree with the neckstrap thing - I would put one on that's long (e.g. from a FS martingale assuming the horse is only cobsize) so she doesn't have to reach down to the neck.

I actually think arabs are fab teens horses - they really teach them how to ride - but in this instance it sounds a bit of a disaster, tbh. In the field, i'd take a leadrope with me & stick her on it with no reins and no stirrups but a neckstrap, and get her to sit to a big trot on that so she loosens her core muscles firstly (obv slow down when she panicks and tenses).

I'd also aks her WHY she wants to ride and what she LIKES about riding so you can do more of that. I might also put flexi reins on the horse so there's some give from the girl's panick grasp?

Sorry if none of this is helpful - my brother used to do this so we did a bit of work getting him to communicate through his seat and legs with her reins tied up and a neckstrap (well schooled horse though, mind) and it did wonders for them both as horsey had to concentrate so wasn't going to spook/bugger off & brother wasn't going to take a hold (only problem is now he doesn't understand really what the hands are for & has washing line reins & no contact...oops!)
 
Thanks everyne - there are some really useful tips here. I think I might hop on it and teach it to slow down when the neckstrap is pulled as this would be a good start.

i think I'm going to print this thread off
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And then after you riding it for a bit maybe if it is more her nerves than the horse, I would probably mark out a slightly over sized school in the field, as it might make her feel more confident (As she knows she can already do it in the school) in the field first and then either gradually make it bigger, or take it away when she stops worrying about riding in open spaces.
 
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