If horses were cars

[Annagain]

I read an advert for a horse last night that described him as a "supercharged Range Rover". He was a big strapping 17hh warmblood, obviously with quite an engine. It got me thinking about all of mine.

Eb would have been a hot hatch - probably an Escort XR3i given that he was an 80s horse. Flashy and lairy, good for showing off but not actually that fast.
Archie would be an old Defender - built like a tank but prone to breaking down and once up to top speed the brakes weren't very effective.
Monty - a Volvo estate. Not particularly fast but very sensible, built with safety as the priority, and utterly, utterly dependable.
Charlie - not too sure yet but I think maybe a VW T5. Able to carry lots, versatile with a turn of speed and a bit of personality that makes him very popular.

Which vehicles could sum up your horses?

 

[Archangel]

One that would be on the back of an AA tow truck most of the time.

 

[HeyMich]

Brilliant question!

My idiot of an ISH would be a Land Rover Defender, with a few bits held on with gaffer tape, but still happy to ford rivers and drive for hours.
The son's new super-XC-pony would be a Ferrari crossed with a pogo stick.
The wee fatty welshy would be an old style ford fiesta, nothing special and reliable but very nippy when he wants to be.
The poorly cushings, muscle myopathic gypsy cob would be a rusty 3-wheeler, still plodding on but not sure for how much longer!

 

[TwyfordM]

One of those little off-road racers... the sort where the bumpers falling off and it’s still running ?

 

[Goldenstar]

Sky would be a Range Rover
Hero and Blue are defenders but nice new ones .
Fatty would be a much loved elderly defender where you worried every year it would make through its MOT .

 

[Rumtytum]

Don’t know what type Flyte would be but I do know he’d be the most ultra eco model out because given a choice he’d run solely on carrots ?

 

[ihatework]

I reckon Oz would be a Jag E pace, premium car with some class but small and not top of the range.

Millie, probably an Alfa Romeo, classy, looks good in black but a bit of a gamble if it will live up to expectation ?

Turnip, a Lexus, pretty, well proportioned and might just surprise you

ETA the big eventer was most definitely a Skoda. Not the most fashionable or with a fancy exterior, but a good solid reliable workhorse that you appreciated as soon as you got behind the wheel

 

[DabDab]

OH and I often discuss this (we're simple souls ?)...
Dabs would be something like a Range rover - comfortable, looks good, great off road, bit heavy on fuel

Arty would be a sporty, soft top Saab - fun, quick, a bit alternative...the architect's horse

Pebbles would be a Suzuki vitara - small, sturdy and a bit agricultural but oh so practical.

 

[rabatsa]

Merlin would be a Ford Capri and Treacle a tractor.

 

[OrangeAndLemon]

I think Ernie would be wearing a Massey Ferguson badge on his nose.

 

[blitznbobs]

Murphy would be a wildcat...

cob features would be a John deer gator

and the big chap would be The QE2

 

[EllenJay]

My old Welshie would have been a Morris Minor - no ABS, no Power Steering, and when moving at speed - not very smooth
Alfie on the other hand would be a BMW saloon. Not flashy, but reliable and comfortable, with a few hidden gadgets.

 

[SEL]

One that would be on the back of an AA tow truck most of the time.

That's the Appy. Looks good, probably buy cheap thinking you'd got a bargain then dashboard lights would come on and the guys at the garage would start shaking their heads and tutting.

Militaire would be a tractor - kind of what an Ardennes is really. A slightly battered one that needs TLC to start but gets the job done.

Microcob - small and nippy. Fiesta or Clio type probably. A decent amount of oomph but you're never going to get pulled over on the M40

 

[The Xmas Furry]

B would be an off roader scrambler bike, yee-har!
A Fuzzy would be the most sparkly pedal car.... pretty, tiny, but goes very slowly and takes ages to get anywhere ?

 

[oldie48]

Rose would be a Mercedes SLK, flashy enough to impress a few people but not enough power or quality to be the real deal.

 

[Nicnac]

ID would be a Volvo 4x4 with a very big engine that takes a lot of fuel for minimal output. Solid, reliable, excellent XC but not terribly supple or quick;
TB would be a Porsche 911 - gorgeous to look at, fast, but quirky and loses control when driver makes a mistake;
Shitland would be a Reliant Robin - elderly, sweet but not quite right in the wheel department.

 

[cindars]

The Arab girls were anything turbo charged. Welsh girl anything sturdy with unexpected pop

 

[Cob Life]

Blue would be a Gator - strong, reliable, great for off roading, could pull a harrow or trailer if needed.

I’m not sure what the the mare would be - she’s got a pretty face, questionable conformation, quirky and surprisingly talented

 

[mini_b]

ID would be a Volvo 4x4 with a very big engine that takes a lot of fuel for minimal output. Solid, reliable, excellent XC but not terribly supple or quick;
TB would be a Porsche 911 - gorgeous to look at, fast, but quirky and loses control when driver makes a mistake;
Shitland would be a Reliant Robin - elderly, sweet but not quite right in the wheel department.

ive got a Volvo as well.
now, do you ever have braking issues with your Volvo? Either whoah you bugger or go you bugger!!

 

[tiahatti]

Tia would be a forklift. Then she could move her hay and treats around the field.

 

[mini_b]

I’ve always compared my ISH to a JCB when he jumps. Gets job done but not very stylish.

 

[millikins]

Declan (Connie) would be an original Mini Cooper S, looks ordinary until you show him a XC course or a long galloping track then suddenly there's all this power and agile as a cat.
Bunny (Dales), I was going to say Defender but she's classier than that so maybe an American truck, powerful, snorty, shiny.
Peter, maybe a Lotus? Nippy, speedy overly dramatic?

 

[mariew]

My girlie would have been a rally car I reckon, one of those that bombs around forest tracks at warp speed

 

[SatansLittleHelper]

Rocket cob would be something very big and flashy, a look at me type 4 wheel drive, all terrain with the turning capacity of a Boeing 747, probably an extremely gaudy canary yellow Hummer with spotlights and chrome bullbars ??
Rex the Connie x cob would be a fashionable Saab soft top with a big boot, good to look at but also practical.
ShitPig the Shitland would be some kind of illegal quad bike with no brakes and rubbish steering powered by red diesel ?

 

[LadyGascoyne]

Mimosa would be an mx5 - inexpensive, no real power, a bit under-specced, and far too small to be practical. But great handling, looks like summer, tougher than it looks and just sheer unadulterated fun.

Milagra would be older model Maserati. Much less expensive to acquire than you’d think, and much more expensive to run. Impossible to insure. Bits are falling off it. Probably wouldn’t drive it over 50mph. Feels like it would have been breathtaking in its day, and still lovely to look at if you can see past the rust.

 

[BBP]

Mimosa would be an mx5 - inexpensive, no real power, a bit under-specced, and far too small to be practical. But great handling, looks like summer, tougher than it looks and just sheer unadulterated fun.

Milagra would be older model Maserati. Much less expensive to acquire than you’d think, and much more expensive to run. Impossible to insure. Bits are falling off it. Probably wouldn’t drive it over 50mph. Feels like it would have been breathtaking in its day, and still lovely to look at if you can see past the rust.

I always described BBP as an mx5, lots of go, super fun but actually pretty bloody useless if you needed to do anything practical. Your description fits him too (other than the ‘tougher than it looks’, although to be fair to him he has tried to keep going through all his troubles).

 

[meleeka]

My grown up son described my Friesian mare as a supercar the other day, high maintenance and too much power for me ?. The others range from Landrovers (cob) to a Jaguar (Welsh mare) and the mini would be a classic mini, small, fun but basic and loud.

 

[LadyGascoyne]

I always described BBP as an mx5, lots of go, super fun but actually pretty bloody useless if you needed to do anything practical. Your description fits him too (other than the ‘tougher than it looks’, although to be fair to him he has tried to keep going through all his troubles).

I love BBP ? and I actually have an mx5. I clearly have a ‘type’.

 

[TinseLeneHorse]

My mare would be a rather ancient white van. Engine gubbed, baldy tyres, would fail mot but still thinks it can run you off the road.

 

[9tails]

Mine would be a well loved old Fourtrak with a snazzy paintjob and defective suspension.