If you were going somewhere with a mate, and she couldn't go...

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skewby

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...because her horse was injured, how would you update her after the event?

Basically my lad is off for a week/10 days after a crashing freak fall (him not me) last week, vet believes it's only muscular but obviously am still concerned. And gutted at missing out on a planned outing today that I was really looking forward to (and hey, paid for!).

Text from friend when she got home was long, effusive, and going on about what a high she was on. I felt horribly, uncharitably cross. Is she being insensitive, or am I being oversensitive?

I do tend to poo my pants at any lameness (basically as he's been lame once in 7 years aside from this!) so am I just making a big deal because of that?

Thoughts please. Sorry to ramble. Just a bit bugged!!
 
Think I'd be a bit miffed TBH as she could have been a bit more tactful but then I suppose if she did really well and she thinks your horse is going to be ok, she must have just been a bit overexcited.

I'd probably reply with something like "good to hear you had a great day, well done..you could have pretended it was rubbish so I didn't feel too bad about not going ;-) ". So it's a sort of "oi don't be so insensitive" but in a jokey way...
 
I would try not to take it to heart too much, I can understand why you're annoyed but I'm sure she never meant to upset you
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Sorry but I think you are being oversensitive. Why shouldn’t she tell you the truth about how the day went? Be honest, what would you have said if it was the other way round, tell the truth or dumb it down? If I had been you I would have been there supporting her, even if my horse was lame, it’s not her fought. Sorry if this sounds harsh but I’m just being honest.
 
well be pleased she had a nice day, and be glad you did the right thing for your horse. there is always another tomorrow. and thats life??????????????? esp with horses!
 
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Be honest, what would you have said if it was the other way round, tell the truth or dumb it down?

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Honestly? I would have dumbed it down! BUT I'm not taking offence at your post - I think this may be down to how I view lameness. It always amazes me when people tell me their horse is lame in a nonchalant way - it makes me absolutely crap myself!!

CC that would have been such a good reply! As it was I replied (through gritted teeth that don't come over by text
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) that I was very pleased for her (I was!) and that I couldn't wait to hear all about it (I dreaded that).

Saw her earlier and did the right thing and listened to her rave about how ace it was. But, to be fair, she achieved lots of stuff that she finds hard, that me and my horse do most weekends and don't think twice about. So I am pleased for her and I think she's just forgotten my feelings a bit in her excitement. Still not something I would do, but completely forgiveable just the same
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well be pleased she had a nice day, and be glad you did the right thing for your horse. there is always another tomorrow. and thats life??????????????? esp with horses!

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Have to agree here can't you be pleased for your friend.
 
Agree with Flowerlady, ezpecially as you obviously consider yourself to be so much more succesful than your friend when your horse is sound
 
[quote
she achieved lots of stuff that she finds hard, that me and my horse do most weekends and don't think twice about. So I am pleased for her and I think she's just forgotten my feelings a bit in her excitement.

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In that case I'm not suprised she is so thrilled, and perhaps it's you that has forgotten her feelings rather than the other way around!? Sorry if that sounds harsh
 
i think the important thing is that skewby has not made her friend feel bad for being happy, and she HAS said she is pleased for her. We're all entitled to feel put out about things like this but skewby has been the bigger person here so i think that deserves some credit!
 
I'm sure your disappointed and have every right to be but everyone has crap times - it seems a bit sad for your friend if her "friend" (i.e. you) couldn't be happy for her and take some joy in her success.

Things with horses change very rapidly and we all need to make the most of the happy times - next week it could be the other way around.
 
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