I'm right fed up ...

zeuscleoharmony

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Due to my collar bone injury I decided to part loan my boy out. Had lots of interest, mainly from people who wanted him to move yards but found a lovely girl who wanted to keep him where is and 'treat him like her own'. She is wonderful, calm, quiet, loves him to bits but a little inexperienced - plenty of riding experience but not too much on the ground. However, everyone needs a chance to learn so I decided she was most suitable. To start, everthing has been perfect until he decided, yesterday, to try his luck and pull her down the yard to eat a bit of grass. He pulled her over, frightened the life out of her and she phoned me in tears. I reassured her that he was just trying his luck and suggested ways of handling the situation. Today, got another phone call, in tears to say he had done it again and that she doesn't want to do him anymore. Its such a shame because she is so lovely and am sure she can overcome this problem but with me out of action, unable to drive so cannot be there with her, she is pretty much on her own dealing with it. He isn't nasty, just being a little sh*t at the moment with her. I have just purchased a dually head collar from Kelly Mark's site, in desperation, do you think this will help? This girl is so lovely and rides him beautifully but he is just trying to take advantage at the moment. I feel awful I wasn't there but she did say she wanted to have him as her own and was quite happy to be left. I just don't think she has had experience with horses who sometimes try their luck. Any suggestions, please.
 
Hm. Anyone who will go in your place and give her a hand and a bit of a guide on handling him? I know you're trying to, but so not easy when you're not there and not able to get around
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I think the dually might help a lot. My sisters horse has a different headcollar though that gives lots of control. Its an eskadron one with a chain that goes over their nose which constricts if they try to tow you off somewhere. It has another ring to clip onto for tying them up etc that is not attached to the chain.

Or can you get yourself or someone else down there to help her for next time? I am assuming that all he needs is a bit of a telling off and he'll be well behaved? Maybe she just needs the confidence of being able to take control and give him a talking to. She may also be worried that if she does this you may think she is badly treating him? (I'm not saying you would!)
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Either you, or an experienced friend/instructor needs to go down there with her and help her - show her how to handle him and be tougher with him.

I can relate to how she feels - my mare got very bargy when I frrst moved her to a yard that was totally DIY (ie. no help) and even though I'd owned her for nearly a year at the time, I was at a loss as to what to do with her. Its the worst feeling, being stuck at the yard on your own, with a horse you don't know what to do with! I posted for advice, I read books, I googled for info, but nothing compares to having someone on the ground with you to show you what to do.
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Agree with MrsM - is there a RI there or someone who can help her? I have a dually for my coblet and yes it does work - maybe consider finding your local IH associate to come and give her a lesson and how to use it - you could be there to watch as you will both find it beneficial in the long run as you won't want to be dragged around by him either. Will help restore her confidence as well as instilling some useful techniques in better leading manners. Can honestly say was the best money I spent on my girl. Anyone can now lead her in and I know there will be no dragging around etc.

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the dually will help, i swear by them have used on bargy youngsters (and elders actually!) with great success but someone still needs to be there to show her how to use it properly as it will have no effect used incorrectly. deffo try and get someone to help her and show her how to deal with him.
 
I'd suggest a weekend groundwork course??? I brought my horse to one of those a few weeks after getting her, and it helped. Definitely made me more confident in handling a bucking (and now due to box rest rearing!!!) little... erm, big... sh*t.

Tell her not to despair. I was in the same situation - done a lot of riding, but no horse handling at all. I presevered, and it's ok now. It's all about toughening up a bit, and remaining calm amidst all the chaos... and also standing your ground!!!
 
Hi ya, thanks for your posts so far and very encouraging the dually will help. It comes with a DVD and will investigate the possibility of getting an IH person to help in the event we have problems. In hindsight it was the wrong decision to leave her alone but she did want this (I have done this in the past, not wanting anyone peering over my shoulder, so I respected her wishes). We have already spoken this evening and between my friend and I we are going to make sure she isn't left alone until she is happy. To be honest, this is very out of character for him and I think too much grass may not have helped and he's being a complete piglet. Starting tomorrow, my good friend who has been helping me out so brilliantly, is going to meet her at the yard and start from basics and nip anything in the bud that happens. My intentions on this one for him and her were well meant but on this ocassion I got things a bit wrong but hopefully will be able to right things from now on. x
 
What a fab friend, thats really good and sounds like things will be back on track soon. Good luck!
Just to add...I dont think anyone thinks you are at fault, dont beat yourself up about it.
x
 
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Hi ya, thanks for your posts so far and very encouraging the dually will help. It comes with a DVD and will investigate the possibility of getting an IH person to help in the event we have problems. In hindsight it was the wrong decision to leave her alone but she did want this (I have done this in the past, not wanting anyone peering over my shoulder, so I respected her wishes). We have already spoken this evening and between my friend and I we are going to make sure she isn't left alone until she is happy. To be honest, this is very out of character for him and I think too much grass may not have helped and he's being a complete piglet. Starting tomorrow, my good friend who has been helping me out so brilliantly, is going to meet her at the yard and start from basics and nip anything in the bud that happens. My intentions on this one for him and her were well meant but on this ocassion I got things a bit wrong but hopefully will be able to right things from now on. x

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Excellent plan
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. Don't y'jus' love neds!
 
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