I'm terrified of doing this...

grandmaweloveyou

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Putting my baby up for loan. *Bombproof stunning 14.3hh tricoloured cob with potential to show at high level so everyone is telling me (including Horse of the Year Show so I am told). Perfect conformation, stunning paces. Great hock movement. Learning to jump and loving it. Needs someone to bring him on though really as he is wasted at present. Ideally to be kept at present yard, initially at least as we have our own school and fabulous facilities with on site assistance. Did have sharers on trial but a mum and daughter who are now sharing another horse at this private yard, so there is company for hacking out and pub rides, mine adores his long pub rides and hacks. He could be great if someone wanted to train him for driving too, he may have done this already but I am not sure. He is 7. I am so so torn, its so emotional, I keep getting calls from beginners and he needs someone that can give him the love and attention is he is so used to getting from me. My partner (ex) is happy to still help too if need be, to lighten the load. Any ideas, any suggestions, any advice for someone that is emigrating and now thinking about cancelling purely for her boy who is her love and pride and joy? Thanks for listening and getting this far, needed to get it off my chest, cried on my yard owners shoulders this morning!! *You all know him well on here and our history together and how well he has progressed with me, he has had one spook in 9 months at a fresian cow, only one so he is as bombproof as any horse ever can be.
 
hmm where are you based? as it says soon to be oz which is too far from me? sorry
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I may be interested is he good in traffic and how much weight do you think he could carry? PM me if you prefer. Sally
 
Australia = flies and heat and I am having enough trouble finding my own apartment let alone a field etc, the ranches etc there would not suit him and its bad enough I am leaving my partner here without taking "our" horse away from her too. This way she can still be in touch with him, see him hopefully, possibly ride him or help out as when needed. Tough decision but trying to please all and wil probably end up pleasing none as they say.
 
Would your partner prefer to be involved, or is she willing to take it as it comes depending on the loanee's preference? It may be best to decide how much involvement she wants, whether she wants to visit etc. beforehand so that you can specify in the contract as a full loanee may prefer her not to visit/be involved etc. which she might not like.
 
we are going to take it as it comes. ive been reading loads on here today about loaners / loanees being involved or at least very well informed and it seems that most ers / ees like it to be kept open and flexible for communication as well as support. its great, im really feeling very positive about what im seeing on here today. but there would be no interference if that is what you are thinking - the other option was to be a sharer with my partner but my partner needs to be concentrate on her own very physical job and i dont want to leave her "holding the baby". blimey its easy to talk and give alot away on here isnt it! must stop, bloo*y chronic rsi giving me jip after only about 8 posts
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ps there will be a contract, absolutely with no shadow of a doubt!
 
Oh, I wasn't implying you'd be interfering - it's perfectly natural for her to want to still see her boy, but you know what they say, nowt as queer as horsey folk, so best to get things in writing.
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If you are leaving for good would it not be easier just to sell him?

I know it will hurt like hell but at least you wont be constantly wondering and having responsibility over him?

If you dont want to do that, then I guess all you can do is vet potential loaners and hope the right one comes along before you have to leave.

((hugs)) I dont envy you, I would hate to be in that position.
 
No i am not leaving for good, i am definitely back mid year and want to see him / ride him subject to loaners agreement in advance, and not cutting my ties here,keeping house as well so ill be living two lives (hopefully) til we are sure what we want to do and where we want to be, also i cant sell him, he is as much my partners baby as mine so a loan home (ideally present yard) or even sharer 70/30% of the time to them is the best way. I am leaving my partner and cant take him too! Such a hard thing to do but if I dont do it now. I have suffered depression for years, been chronically ill for years and had to have a total hysterectomy last year so i definitely deserve some "me" time!
 
not a bad idea but he is at a stage where he could really go very very far and his age is critical to this progress but if noone is able / willing to take him to where he should be capable of going then yes this may be an option for sure. i reckon he would like the rest bless him!
 
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