Is is bad to not ride if im tired and cant be bothered :-o

[Notimetoride]

Been very very busy at work lately and had a 4 1/2 hour drive yesterday for work. Got home today at about 6.15, with plans to ride. I have certain days that i ride - usually about about three days a week - and tonight is usually a riding night. I have a new horse and am working quite hard at getting to know her and trying to improve my slightly shaky confidence. So it is important that I ride as often as I can, as we are making good progress. However tonight, if the truth be known, I just 'cant be bothered' . I am purely a leisure rider, both me and horse are unfit, so Im certainly not aiming for anything other than improving confidence. By the time I have got in from work, got to the yard, done jobs, ridden etc etc, I end up having tea at about 9.30, and not getting to bed till 11 ish - often nearer midnight. Then up again next day at 5.30/6 to start again. BUT, i feel terribly guilty. I adore my new pony - she's the sweetest thing in the world, and loves attention, so I feel rotten not riding her. And I know its not going to help me with my confidence. Everyone else seems so motivated, riding what seems like every day, so I feel like a right lightweight. I last rode her on Sunday, and wont now get to ride till Friday. Why do I feel so bad ? I just want to put my feel up and watch telly :-o

 

[blitznbobs]

I don't have good experiences when I force myself to ride ... Every injury I've had has been on this scenario... As long as it's not every night then I don't see the issue. If it is every night then it's time to reconsider your horse etc

 

[Charlie007]

Don't be so hard on yourself!! There's only so much you can do and if your tired your ride probably won't have been productive anyway!! Perhaps you could book a lesson or something so you have something to aim for to keep you motivated?
As long as her needs are met I doubt you missing a riding night is going to bother her x

 

[BlackRider]

I agree with the others, riding when your too tired can be counter productive, also, horses are meant to be fun, its not fun when you are shattered.

(I do a lot of driving too, so I understand where you are coming from, usually lunge on those days)

 

[MyBoyChe]

I think if youre tired and feeling like that it is probably a good decision not to ride, You need to be on your mettle around a horse and accidents will happen more easily if you are not quite with it! Wait another day or two, the horse wont be bothered. Im in a similar situation to you by the sound of it, although I have owned my boy almost 3 years. I am a leisure rider, I have no interest in riding round in circles so the two of us are happy hackers. I ride weekends and try to ride twice during the week. I work part time and have 3 dogs. Its not always easy to fit in riding time so rather than rush I give it a miss. He is out 24/7 so quite happy and doesnt get silly if he isnt ridden for weeks so I have stopped worrying about it.

 

[vmac66]

I have night like this, I always try to bring my horse in either for a quick brush and hooves picked out or I tend to give him a quick lunge.

 

[tallyho!]

Just think....... your horse will be doing mini fist pumps all evening!

You have just made his day smile, get some rest and try not to push yourself so hard.

Your horse will not have deteriorated or forgotten everything because you missed riding for one night. Chill.

 

[Notimetoride]

Just think....... your horse will be doing mini fist pumps all evening!

You have just made his day smile, get some rest and try not to push yourself so hard.

Your horse will not have deteriorated or forgotten everything because you missed riding for one night. Chill.

That made me chuckle

 

[Holly Hocks]

No you shouldn't feel bad for not riding. I doubt your horse will be bothered. I sometimes find that when I've forced myself to ride when I've had a bad day at work or I'm tired, I don't ride well. Consequently the horse goes badly, I get in a bad mood and then it deteriorates and I end up feeling 10 times worse than if I had just not ridden at all. Don't feel guilty at all!

 

[rowan666]

I don't have good experiences when I force myself to ride ... Every injury I've had has been on this scenario...

same here!
I rarely ride these days, mine get all winter off anyway and the last few mnths i think ive rode a grand total of twice! my friends daughter has got more use out of my pony lately than i have and even thats only bin once a fortnight for pony club while hers has bin lame and besides being a bit too fat shes not going to break not being in full time work so im not too fussed although i am looking for a sharer for her.
Stop beating yourself up, lifes too short

 

[OldNag]

If no-one sees you not riding, then it's not bad

Seriously though, I doubt very much it'll hurt your horse to miss an evening. We do this for fun. If you want a night off, give yourself a night off.

 

[FfionWinnie]

I ride every single day as I need to for my horse's health. I haven't missed a day since she came back into work in Feb after a catastrophic tying up episode. She has to be exercised at the same level all the time.

It's revolutionised my life and I have to say there has not been a single time even in the most horrendous weather that I've got off and thought I didn't enjoy that. She thrives on the work and it's keeping me slim too.

I've just bought another one. She's not ridden yet but I've made sure she's had work every day too. Once both are in full work I will probably ride and lead alternate days. Or maybe not. I'm loving it

My suggestion is simplify everything so tacking up takes minutes. Even if you ride for 10 minutes it's worth it.

 

[Hoof_Prints]

I was going to ride 4 yesterday, I was pretty tired so I ended up falling sleep in our yard caravan and riding a total of 0
From personal experience, never ride when tired and never if you can be a bit grumpy ! It just ends up being counterproductive anyway and days off are good for a horse that's ridden a fair bit, they often get minor injuries to the soft tissue that we can't pick up on but still need time off to heal (can you tell I am amazing at justifying not riding )

It's your horse, ride it when you like! Nobody is making you

 

[wench]

If you don't feel like it, don't do it! Watch TV catch up on sleep, and try again next week!

 

[BBP]

Like FfionWinnie I have to work mine every day and have done since Feb. But like you I have days when I'm exhausted and just can't be bothered. I know myself well enough to know I ride badly and get grumpy on those days so I just lead him out.

I try to ride before work where possible as I know I can lack motivation in the evenings. I don't know if that's an option for you? I get up at 4:45/5am to fit it in, doesn't sound appealing but this time of year it's easy as its already sunny at that time! Not sure how I'll cope in winter.

Prior to his diagnosis I was happy to give him a day or two off a week and took them when I was knackered, I never felt guilty for it.

 

[Wheels]

I have days like this too, it's only natural when leading busy lives that you sometimes need a break.

When I fee like that i just bring my horse in for a good brush, do some in hand schooling or lunging then it's a quicker session and I can get to my bed at a decent hour

 

[Echo Bravo]

Everyone deserves a night off even the horse

 

[JDH01]

You should know the answer - what is the point of anything, ride if you want to ride and don't if you don't but accept the consequences

 

[maccachic]

Horses are for fun, just do whatever makes you happy they don't care one little bit so long as they are well cared for and their needs are met. I bet myself up for ages after my OE when I got back home and back into horses and didn't have the drive and determination I once had that was before I realised my priority's had changed and that that was OK.

There is loads that can be achieved thru ground work look at Equitation Science or similar and it needed take long each day

 

[Barnacle]

I think the questions that need to be asked are how often do you feel this way and what are your long term goals? If this is a one-off apathetic day, no problem. It won't harm anyone and you have every right to take a day off now and then. But if you're feeling like this often, you need to ask yourself why. In particular it sound like you've had some confidence issues and that your goal is to sort that out. If that's the case you need to be honest with yourself. Are you trying to find reasons not to ride through fear or apprehension? If so, giving in can be very detrimental... You should perhaps look into a specialist instructor and schedule something regular that you feel comfortable with and can't just drop if you're feeling unsure. You may also cut down how many days you ride - that's fine - but it should stay regular. Just be honest with yourself It's ok to feel afraid, if that's what it is' but you need to face it if your goal is to regain that confidence. If all you want to do is groom and groundwork, that's fine too - but accept it so you aren't keeping yourself from the parts you like just to avoid riding.

 

[tallyho!]

LOL Barnacle!!!

Are you serious??

She's knackered from a long drive and is a bit too pooped to ride and you think she needs to rethink her life??

 

[Palindrome]

It sounds like you have a very long day with work and commute. Don't worry if you don't ride. As long as your horse gets his turnout and feed he won't care if you ride or not.
I am a weekend rider since I have had my son as I don't have anyone to take care of the little one while I ride during the week. The horse isn't bothered and I am not either, she is enjoying her chilling out time and being a leisure horse. Everyone is happy .

 

[oldie48]

No but I also read the post and thought "why do you need permission not to ride?" I think all that Barnacle is suggesting is that she needs to be sure of why she chose not to ride. If its really because she's knackered, fine! We all have days when we really just want to go home and have a nice big glass of wine and chill and frankly I don't need to justify that to myself or ask anyone's permission. However, I've had confidence issues and know I've looked for reasons not to ride and that's a very different proposition all together.

LOL Barnacle!!!

Are you serious??

She's knackered from a long drive and is a bit too pooped to ride and you think she needs to rethink her life??

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

I have quite a few days where I don't ride - ie all winter! I ride at work, I have show horses and they get the winter off. That's my excuse and I am sticking to it!

A few days won't make the slightest bit of difference. Especially if she isn't a competition horse. Take some time for yourself, so long as your horse gets food and water I highly doubt they will give 2 hoots about being ridden.

 

[NZJenny]

I think there is a difference between "tired" and "can't be bothered". So maybe figure out which it was and go from there.

After a long, tiring day at work, riding puts my head in a whole other place, and I go home a much better person.

"Can't be bothered", means I go home, break out the sloppy dressing gown and slippers, eat cheese on toast for dinner and watch reality TV.

 

[tallyho!]

No but I also read the post and thought "why do you need permission not to ride?" I think all that Barnacle is suggesting is that she needs to be sure of why she chose not to ride. If its really because she's knackered, fine! We all have days when we really just want to go home and have a nice big glass of wine and chill and frankly I don't need to justify that to myself or ask anyone's permission. However, I've had confidence issues and know I've looked for reasons not to ride and that's a very different proposition all together.

Sometimes, people come on HHO just to vent. That's fine. If it means asking whether or not it's about being bad if you don't ride, or, asking how many rugs to use to use because then sun is out, or, asking if taking shoes off will make horses turn into goats etc... it's just conversation.

I can't see how this thread is about deep rooted issues somehow... maybe I'm not very perceptive. Sorry if it is OP and I'm just being cold hearted

If it is, then I think there's an imbalance of the horsey society which dictates horses must be ridden twice a day every day or you are a poor excuse for a horse-person

 

[Casey76]

I decide if I'm going to ride on a day-to-day basis.

Despite my hypothyroidism being "managed" I'm often so fatigued after a day at the office I can hardly see straight to drive. I go to the yard every day after work with the intention of riding, and I'll evaluate when I get there how I physically feel.

I have a friend who rides my mare fairly regularly, so it's not as if she isn't getting any exercise, and my youngster is being brought on a tad slower than most (I don't think he cares!)

There are some people at the yard who exercise their horses every day, and I do feel a bit guilty, but then again, I'm just a pleasure rider, not a competition rider. I would have to up my game if I wanted to get my mare fit enough to compete, rather than just have lessons.

 

[muckypony]

I think there is a difference between "tired" and "can't be bothered". So maybe figure out which it was and go from there.

Agree with this.

If you consistently ‘can’t be bothered’ to ride, do you actually want to?

If I ever feel like this then I always force myself to as I feel sooo much better afterwards! There’s nothing better than having an a crappy day at work and then coming home to have a fab ride. Feeling too tired to ride though is fair as fair and sometimes it’s just best left for the next day – go home, get an early night and ride tomorrow.

The main thing that bugs me is those who continuously can’t be bothered, give their horses 2/3 days off then expect them to be the same as they left them 4 days ago and get annoyed if they aren’t. That’s not how it works.. If you can’t be bothered, why should the horse!

 

[Mitchyden]

I haven't ridden Lana for nearly a year because I can't be bothered and she's loving it! I've competed for over 30 years and have never been a happy hacker - I ride to compete, not just for fun. It's my horse and she's happy so I don't feel bad.

 

[Barnacle]

Sometimes, people come on HHO just to vent. That's fine. If it means asking whether or not it's about being bad if you don't ride, or, asking how many rugs to use to use because then sun is out, or, asking if taking shoes off will make horses turn into goats etc... it's just conversation.

I can't see how this thread is about deep rooted issues somehow... maybe I'm not very perceptive. Sorry if it is OP and I'm just being cold hearted

If it is, then I think there's an imbalance of the horsey society which dictates horses must be ridden twice a day every day or you are a poor excuse for a horse-person

Indeed they do... But sometimes they come on because they have a problem and want help with it. The OP mentioned confidence issues several times and there is a common pattern with people who lack confidence trying to avoid riding (or whatever activity) and coming up with excuses and then feeling they need justification so looking for someone to affirm. If she just felt tired and skipped a day, that's fine. As I said, she has every right. No one is required to ride any specific number of times and there's absolutely nothing wrong with taking time off! I wasn't presuming to know which it was and was trying to offer some good advice in case it was avoidance. Does it not make sense to address the potential issue rather than setting it aside in favour of the "safe" reply?

Nice to be laughed out for trying to help.