IS IT JUST ME.....?

missfitz50

missfitz50

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I think we can safely say that most horsey people are pretty straight to the point and don’t take any nonsense but I find it creeps into my working environment too. Now I work in a sales department in a fairly well to-do company where image/impressions really do count! Even my boss says that I don’t suffer fools gladly! :rolleyes:

I just can’t seem to keep my mouth shut if I don’t agree with something or “pussy foot” around a subject when there’s a straight answer. I think 25 years of getting up at 5am in all weathers, dealing with injuries of all descriptions (both me and the horse!) and all the other stuff that comes with horse owning will do that to a person, lol! :D

So is it just me? Do I need to be more sympathetic the next time someone comes into work late because the au pair is on holiday and they had to take their own children to school? Or they can’t work late because they’ve got a yoga class to get to? Do I really need to sellotape my mouth shut in future? Are there more of you out there!!?? :D
 
I'm known as being 'to the point'....

Not rude as such, but I must admit to being baffled as to why someone (who I know doesn't work, has no animals/kids) can be late for a 10am appointment when all they've had to do is get themselves somewhere on time, when I've been up mucking out 3 horses, showering, making lunchboxes,dropping kids off at school and still managing to get to work for 9am....
 
missfitz50 said:
Do I need to be more sympathetic the next time someone comes into work late because the au pair is on holiday and they had to take their own children to school? Or they can’t work late because they’ve got a yoga class to get to? Do I really need to sellotape my mouth shut in future? Are there more of you out there!!?? :D
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Yes, chill out. If someone asks me a question I tend to give an honest answer whether or not its the one the person asking the question expects or wants to hear but that's not the same as having a go at people for having different priorities to you. Why should someone miss their yoga class because you want them to work late? If you want to give out your opinions I think that's fine but don't be surprised when someone from an opposing POV gives it you back without holding back. :D
 
im the same, doesnt matter what it is but if i dont agree i have to say!! x It annoys me when people say 'i was late but i do live 50 miles away' sooo what?! You choose to live 50 miles away, not a valid reason to be late for work! Or 'sorry, got stuck in traffic' well factor it in to allow time!!

To be honest, i hate people being late more than anything.

I always feel that you should say what you think, eg - if i felt i didnt get paid enough, i would say so - which i did, then i got a payrise, so that solved that. If i'd hinted or pussyfooted around it then i wouldnt of got it as my boss wouldnt of known how i felt about it.

It also annoys me when people moan that they hate their job....well find a different one then or shut up!! x

:D
 
I am the other end of the scale. I get used all the time yet inside my head isscreaming at me to get a backbone and bite back. It's just as frustrating being a pushover as being forthright and to the point. People are always asking me to do things, that sometimes take up best part of a day then I need to rush to finish what I was planning to do before interruptions!
For example a few weeks ago another livery asked me to help her move to new yard, ok I thought it won't take long, but bleeding horse wouldn't load, so a favour that would have taken an hour max ended up being the best part of my sole day off.
Think I need assertive lessons.
 
Flame_ said:
Yes, chill out. If someone asks me a question I tend to give an honest answer whether or not its the one the person asking the question expects or wants to hear but that's not the same as having a go at people for having different priorities to you. Why should someone miss their yoga class because you want them to work late? If you want to give out your opinions I think that's fine but don't be surprised when someone from an opposing POV gives it you back without holding back. :D
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Hahaha! It's just a tongue in cheek post so perhaps not the best examples to give! What I'm trying to say is far too many people sweat the small stuff... a better example maybe is someone having a tantrum because their hair colour went wrong! Now, to me that isn't the end of the world........ and as for asking someone to work late, it was because of them in the first place that the rest of us had to work late :rolleyes:
 
yeah me, im not unsympathetic, just cant be bothered as with people and their excuses and rubbish they talk :-) im also kbown in work as the one who takes bo prisoners
 
I think those of us who are over 25 have been used to shouting PC instructors and being given a lecture about turnout so have developed thicker skins

My pet hate when I managed a lot of staff was young people coming in to my office for a cry

It seems that so many youngsters have been moddycoddled in to thinking that they are the best at everything, everything is all ok and everyone loves you, no harsh words or raised voices for fear of stifling their creativity or having parents come down on you like a ton of bricks

So many people on forums call things bullying because they aren't used to being told how it is and most of them are youngsters

Throwing a wobbly seems to be the reaction toany harsh words

As a manager I had a sign in my office that said 'get back to work, I don't pay you to believe in the power of your dreams' - a bit harsh maybe lol :D
 
I agree. I couldn't believe when I moved to Ireland and it seemed like nobody could be on time, emails never answered, and my all time favorite was "we'll call you back on that." I find many times I say, we both now you won't call me back so I'll just get back to you. Even when riding out for yards and I have to be there at half 7, my horses are done before I go. Summer time means riding before I go. Winter I have to ride when I get back, but all 6 stables are mucked, back down, bedded, clean water and hay. But I love getting everything done that I possibly can early. My horses like being out all day and I likes to nap! It's from when I had to be at the yard in America by half 4, 7 days a week. Unless you want to go to bed at 8 at night you never get enough sleep. But I never tolerated other riders being late either even at half 4. You make nearly a grand a week and work 4-5 hours max a day. 20 hours is plenty of time for sleeping and living life. Don't see the need for being late.

Terri
 
Definately not just you!!

I'm known to my friends for being the on to ask for an honest opinion and the person not to ask if you looking for some one to massage your feelings! Its been said that I don't beat around the bush so to speak.

I like to think I'm a nice person.. but I'm very impatient and very intolerant of people that winge moan or think that everything bad only happens to them. I also find it really hard to stop my mouth from saying things, half the time its already been said before I've even decided what my opinion is on the matter!! ha :D


I'm suprised I have any friends! :D :D :D
 
People know when they have upset me, my friends don't mind, they tend not to upset me anyway, and those that get yancy about being taken down a peg or two soon learn to put up or shut up! Not backwards in coming forwards I think you should say! I also can't stand people who take time off sick with a bit of a cold, when I mange to work in serious pain from injuries, I am deeply unsypathetic, however, if someone genuinely has a lot on their plate, I will always help them out, and can be very forgiving, but if they cross me or take advantage then the toys come out of the pram.
 
lcharles said:
im the same, doesnt matter what it is but if i dont agree i have to say!! x It annoys me when people say 'i was late but i do live 50 miles away' sooo what?! You choose to live 50 miles away, not a valid reason to be late for work! Or 'sorry, got stuck in traffic' well factor it in to allow time!!

To be honest, i hate people being late more than anything.

I always feel that you should say what you think, eg - if i felt i didnt get paid enough, i would say so - which i did, then i got a payrise, so that solved that. If i'd hinted or pussyfooted around it then i wouldnt of got it as my boss wouldnt of known how i felt about it.

It also annoys me when people moan that they hate their job....well find a different one then or shut up!! x

:D
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Surprising though it may seem, you CANNOT factor traffic problems into your journey time. Yesterday there was an accident on my motorway route which caused gridlock on the surrounding roads, with everyone else also trying to get to work on time the same as me. Not having wings or the ability to levitate I just had to resign myself to being late for work and call ahead to let them know. Why should I get the benefit of your wrath because two idiots drove into each other?
 
A few years ago I took over managing an established IT telephone support team. They were mostly youngsters living at home with their parents. They were supposed to be at their desk ready to start answering the phones at 9am. They would stroll in a 8.59 then go into the kitchen to make themselves some breakfast. When I asked why they were eating breakfast in work time they told me they didn't have time to eat at home! When I told them to get up earlier they looked at me in amazement.
 
I tend to spend a lot of time saying 'and?' Which is slightly more polite than 'ffs get a grip'. I am professional at work, but other mums moaning about the extreme hardship of being a housewife, or working pt irritate me. One horse owners who think a 9-5 job & a horse on diy is a hard life. Those who spend three decades relating everything back to something unpleasant years ago. Obviously I don't mean real tragedy, I mean stuff they should have moved on from. The weakminded, hard done to in general really.
 
Actually, being 'horsey' has developed my ability to smile nicely and grit my teeth when I can barely contain my irritation when talking to the eejits which I seem to have to do on a daily basis :rolleyes:
 
fatpiggy, theres a difference between being stuck in normal every day traffic and being caught up in traffic following a massive accident. Where i live, one place is known for accidents and probably 3-4 times a week its held up for 1/2 hour or more, so i'd leave 1/2 hour earlier everyday to allow for this, if its all clear then you get to work slightly earlier but you're not late if it is delayed. Unfortunatley, people do have awful crashes that close motorways for hours on end which you cant allow time for as they are generally one off's, but everyday traffic which is part of getting to work should be allocated for. It might take me 10 minutes to get to work on a sunday evening when the roads are quiet but could take 25 minutes or longer on a monday morning, i dont leave ten minutes to get to work and say 'sorry im late, there was traffic' - i factor it in and leave earlier in the week.

I also dont expect people to get in at 8am and then stand in the kitchen gossiping for 20 minutes, at 8am they should be sat at there desks ready to work.
 
There seems to be a lot of self appointed good managers on here who are qualified to judge other people and their individual situations. I would never miss my yoga class for work why the hell should i?? Not unless they were prepared to pay double my very valuable time for it. As for being a working mum and housewife, news flash it is hard work especially when you own one horse on diy as well. Most managers I know are incompetent at dealing with people and all they can manage successfully is upsetting people.
 
Sorry, I'm not about to get my violin out because someone has the hard task of being a housewife or works 20hrs a week. It's really not that hard. And at the end of the day, even ft, kids & horses on diy is a life choice, not a call for sympathy or whinges.
 
Equilibrium Ireland said:
I agree. I couldn't believe when I moved to Ireland and it seemed like nobody could be on time, emails never answered, and my all time favorite was "we'll call you back on that." I find many times I say, we both now you won't call me back so I'll just get back to you.
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pmsl :D we have "Fermanagh Time" here, and everyone thinks its hilarious and perfectly normal to be late for everything :mad: My clients have got used to me though - if you book a 2pm lesson, I will be yours between 2pm and 3pm. If you choose not to arrive till five past, then spend ten minutes tacking up, then another ten chatting, you will get a short lesson :p

Mind you, my bluntness with humans is largely why I work mainly with horses ;)
 
I'm definitely not a pushover in work, and I've even heard that a few of the team leaders and even managers are scared to run things past me if they think I'll disagree with them!! Not sure why they are though, as I never fly off the handle but I will stand up for myself, and my colleagues if need be. I do think that having horses can make you 'no nonsense' and I have also spent the last 20 years climbing so I tend to be rather intolerant of trivial things.
 
No it's not just you!!

I've just one of those corporate psychanalysis type things that profiles your personalit and suchlike.

(The Insight program for anyone interested)

And I am a 'Red' person - a reforming director - and the blub is frightenly accurate!!!
 
At the risk of sticking the ol' noggin above the parapet, I frequently find I catch more bees with honey than vinegar. So if someone has a problem, I'll propose a solution. If the person opts not to act (using my solution or a different solution) and chooses to continue to complain, that's self indulgent, at which point I feel it's OK to be a bit more firm. However, I always try to do this in a nice way. I don't think there's any need to be rude, which a lot of people are, using 'straight talking' as a get-out clause (although I'm sure that doesn't apply to any of you, eh!). My fella shoots from the hip; it's done him no real favours, and indeed has upset people who he needs to get along with. There are a lot more people who like and respond well to a positive constructive attitude than a confrontational one, in my experience. I'd prefer to get what I want out of the situation, rather than just getting an opportunity to express dissatisfaction, shall we say!

I try and treat the horses the same way. Works well on the dogs too!
 
Having read most of the post, there are varying degrees of "I don't take no prisoners" what I will say is some posts clearly like to get on with life and what is expected of them and find those that we tend to carry as a pain in the neck, I agree,

Then there are some posts where the poster talks about bringing people down a peg or two, hang on a minute unless you are the boss, everyone is entitled to their ideas and plans, no one needs to be bullied by bringing them down a peg or two but rather taught to think differently, and yes I do agree as I am the same but I also dislike "those who think they are better than others and can manage anything", and enjoy reminding others of their last injury and how they still managed, we are not all the same, unfortunately.

Sometimes less said is more meaningful.
 
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