Is this to much to expect.. (sold horse, new owner)

jhoward

jhoward

Demon exorcist...
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Ive just sold my mare, (well shes on trial money due sunday)

horse.. 5yr 16.2 mw tb x. has been a show horse with me, but has also done a month on working livery and been x country etc. not really done much for past 8 weeks odd hack.

Buyer.. mare is for 15 yr kid wanting to do pony club etc. fairley decent rider.

heres the intresting bit, and my question is have they just expected/done to much??

before bying her, they came and tried her 4 times.. intital trial at yard, then kid came and hacked out with me, then she met a friend and they went on normal teenagers hack, then final time i gave a lesson and done some jumping. horse in this time was also 5 stage vetted.

they take mare home for half term week. day 2 they take her up to bicton and do showjumping/x country. they have also done some fast hacking.
Ive just had a call to tell me yesterday mare slammed on breaks going into a jump and reared. OMG that horse loves jumping and doesnt even stop let alone rear. so on disscussing more. I ask if mare has had a day off since last sunday.. NO. so my thoughts are she is very sore as not fit and they have simply done to much. In the past 5 days they have done all of the above and the mare hasnt put a foot out of place. not even going on to a busy x country course for her only second time.

So what do i do??? the people dont want to give up but im now worried for my horse (not paid for yet/) and shes to good to be messed up.

as of sunday I have no where to keep her so am very stuck on that front. I do have another byer intrested but am waiting for him to call me back. Hes been incontact the past 6 weeks waiting for these people to decided what the hell they want.

theres a huge part of me that wants to say just bring my horse back now. she is so genuine for a 5yr and i really do think that she is proberely sore, but im not willing to do another weeks trial/faffing about.

the horse isnt to far away so i may try and go and see her today. ( i dont drive )
 
Sound the second buyer out. Explain the situation to him with regards to not having somewhere to keep her now.
5 days in a new place being hammered into the ground......she would be out of there in a flash if she were mine.
 
I have to say I think you are very generous giving a trial especially as it is half term!

It sounds as if you are right and she is tired and sore but I would be worried. If they mess her up then you are going to be the one paying to put her right. I think they have had plenty of time to make their minds up and I would have her back now (I know that could be difficult for you) or they pay in full now. It is half term and they may not be used to having such a young/unfit horse and have been a bit thoughtless. My "nasty" side says were they just after a nice ride for the week??? Sorry but that was the first thing that came to mind.
 
I think that they're getting as much in as possible for the trial and as it's half-term.

I understand your angst. What do the people seem like? Do you think they'll calm down? Do you have any knowledge of them?

I would be concerned that the horse has done so much, then xc without any time off.
 
To be fair, if this has happened once and has scared her (all horses have there days), I think you should suggest she buys an older show jumping schoolmaster rather than a young horse. If they still want her, I would ask for the monies upfront now or tell them your taking her back as you have had another genuine buyer that has waited over 6 weeks to try this horse. They have definately done too much in the past week and your poor girl probably needs a break.
 
Sorry,

I woudn't let anything go 'out for a weeks trial'. Have done that before and was sent back a lame horse. You need to get your money or get her back as soon as possible.
 
dont think they are the sort to take the p, I know the vet that done the vetting and he has been their vet for a while, he was so impressed with the mare. but he did say they were a bit in experianced, I didnt mind this as Id already said im there to support at any point if needed.

I let them have the trial, as mare is so special to me and really want to find her the right home, plus they are fairley local.. that is until I could do with getting there. arrrggg

am waiting for other guy to call me back, but his friend has told me that hes away until tomorrow.

am also about to ring a friend see if she can go up there if needed. again arggg.

my poor baby mare. I actully expected her to be unsettled but apparently shes been a complete star. until now.. which again tells me the horse is saying there is a problem.
 
missparis said:
To be fair, if this has happened once and has scared her (all horses have there days), I think you should suggest she buys an older show jumping schoolmaster rather than a young horse. If they still want her, I would ask for the monies upfront now or tell them your taking her back as you have had another genuine buyer that has waited over 6 weeks to try this horse. They have definately done too much in the past week and your poor girl probably needs a break.
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the kids not been scared, they got sold a "dud" horse that done a lot worse, think they are just as shocked as i am.
 
ok have sorted with friend that she can go up there. its not ideal, but its secure. lots of others for company and no sheep fencing..

right now 2nd thing. before i whip her back do i give them a chance? and say 2 days off then ride her when i can be there sunday?

arg arg arg..
 
Yes M, I agree., am trying to sort out going out theres asap my gut feeling is i need to check on her. and as i said above, friend has said she can go up there. so having her back isnt an issue. I could be over reacting and they could of been a bit daft in expectations.. dont get me wrong they are nice people.
 
If they want to try her with you on Sunday then they have to pay for her in full or send her away at the end of the lesson! That would be my terms.
In the meantime I would take her away from them so you know she is rested.
I would also see if the other person is still interested and give them an update.
An inexperienced home for a young horse does not sound ideal. Having said that many years ago my daughters first proper horse was green and we had never had anything but hairy ponies. We did, however, have a lot of proper support.
 
Well you can only go on what they have told you, my guess is there would be more to it than that, but you can't second guess things, horses don't loose their fitness that quickly if there have been pretty fit to start with, but if she's not been jumped for a while and she's not just been popping a few poles, anything could of happened, you don't know how she warms her up, cools her down etc, mare could of easily tweeked something and just said enough is enough, thing is you'd think they would of thought this themselves.

Perhaps suggest to them they should get her looked at by a vet etc before they return her and decide what to do from there, I don't think you can make any fair decisions until she's been looked out, if they obviously liked the mare when she was all good and well, you'd think they'd offer to get her looked at if they really wanted to keep her, if you don't have the room to have her back it not really their fault though, if it was just trial.

hmmm duno, it's a tough one.

Hope she's ok and you sort things out.
 
I think they are taking the p already to be honest, I'm looking for a horse at the moment and think that amount of viewings sounds amazing, but I'd start to feel like a bit of a chancer after two!

I think after the amount of trials they had at yours they should be able to make their mind up.

I appreciate that on a trial at theirs they want to do as much as possible to check her out but they are buying a five year old!! You should expect to take it a bit steady for a couple of months, not be out everyday, it would be different if they were buying a proven pc pony or something.

They may just be enthusiastic and not realise that they are doing too much, but it sounds a lot to me as though they are getting free riding and making the most of it.......

If you think they are nice and suitable I'd say that you have another buyer so you need them to take the decision and pay now or you'll have her back (and they will lose their deposit and vetting fee). They have had plenty of time and have now overfaced your horse. I would explain to them that she probably only reacted this way because she had done far too much in too shorter space of time.
 
am goin gout this evening to have a look at her and will also get the kid to hop on. actully thinking about it, when i spoke to them a couple of days ago they said about her opening her mouth alot and should they put a flash on..

not something shes ever needed and i went off and looked at all the ridden piccies.. never in one of them not even having a gallop x country did she have her mouth open .

Kenzo i can have her back, ive jsut sorted that. and they clearly dont want to give up on her.
 
Katt said:
I think they are taking the p already to be honest, I'm looking for a horse at the moment and think that amount of viewings sounds amazing, but I'd start to feel like a bit of a chancer after two!

I think after the amount of trials they had at yours they should be able to make their mind up.

I appreciate that on a trial at theirs they want to do as much as possible to check her out but they are buying a five year old!! You should expect to take it a bit steady for a couple of months, not be out everyday, it would be different if they were buying a proven pc pony or something.

They may just be enthusiastic and not realise that they are doing too much, but it sounds a lot to me as though they are getting free riding and making the most of it.......

If you think they are nice and suitable I'd say that you have another buyer so you need them to take the decision and pay now or you'll have her back (and they will lose their deposit and vetting fee). They have had plenty of time and have now overfaced your horse. I would explain to them that she probably only reacted this way because she had done far too much in too shorter space of time.
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I have just spoke to her to tell her i would be out around 6pm, and did say that i think they have done to much, and to be fair she did agree with me.

they were being so careful as the last horse they bought was a complete nightmare and very dangerous. so it went back to seller. I understood this and was happy for them to try her in all situations, we also loaded her, they bathed her, lunged her, ,She had a week off during them riding so they could try her fresh..

ok so maybe I was to generous but selling her is heartbreaking and not something i really want to do so a good home and it being local seemed a good option.
 
go and see for yourself. It may justbe as you say they did too much and didn't realise. It maybe that they have had some bad advice
Make sure they were riding in the saddle and bit they were supposed too
 
soulfull said:
go and see for yourself. It may justbe as you say they did too much and didn't realise. It maybe that they have had some bad advice
Make sure they were riding in the saddle and bit they were supposed too
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yep checked all thoose things already. they were riding in the field where the horse grazes, id say normally this could play a part, but then my school was a fenced off area in the field with the horses so its not something out of the normal for her to be asked to do.
 
At least when you've asked the question they've been up front about how much they've worked her. I'd get her back now, too many good young horses have been ruined in the wrong hands. As said, they need a schoolmaster, not a youngster. If they think a horse can work like this & are surprised when she says no then they don't have the experience to bring her on & help her fulfill her potential. They seem very selfish in just doing what they want & never sparing your girl a second thought. If you agree to the sell you can never have any more control over what happens to her.
 
Hmm, I wouldn't be too happy about selling my horse to anyone who ignored that fact it was unfit, probably upset by the change, might be used to different aids, but can't be bothered to find out and hammered it here there and anywhere. Numpties and best avoided.
 
That is why I've said no to a trial for the two horses that I've sold. My feeling is that far from helping the horse to find the best home possible that it encourages the new owners to rush everything and try the horse in lots fo new situations before they are really ready. I'll have had Gerry two weeks on Sunday and I've only cantered him once so far, I haven't jumped him and I haven't ridden him on the road. Not that I think he'll be a problem with any of these things but I do think that they need time to settle in before you start asking too many questions of them.
 
I'm sure you are right, a relatively unfit, young horse, that all of a sudden has been out everyday for nearly a week doing fast work and jumping must be pretty sore by now. Did you say he was already vetted, as I would worry he may not pass at the moment. Check how tight his hamstrings are. I hope he's not been hammered too much as you don't want splints starting either! This is why a lot of sellers don't allow trials any more.
 
As one of the above posts said it sounds as though you don't want to sell the horse. However well-matched home and animal are now you still loose all control over what happens later. if you want an on-going input into the horse's career you have to retain ownership.

Quite possible novices won't have known they were being over-demanding but still be well-intentioned. You could always suggest this to them and see how they react. I wouldn't expect them to still want to buy (or you to sell!) if you removed the horse from their care as you didn't think they were capable of looking after it though.
 
No in all honesty I dont want to sell her, (shes the mare in my avatar) but life dictates. I bought her as a show horse, have had her since a 4yr old, have had some ups and downs but competed to a high level qualified for everything barring hoys/rihs (hadnt tried)

LOL we went from a horse that wound me up so much I couldnt even go near her, A horse that should of beaten hoys horses at a county show but decided to have an epic hissy fit in the ring. (I was so cross I stuck the class out then dismounted gave her to the hubby and went to cool off, 48 hours later she had her 1st ride judge behaved so well even when some muppet fell in a hedge as she was going past and went reserve champ at the chaps regionals.) to a horse I trust so much Id put a novice on.

shes made me smile when lifes got me down, given me the horse to go and compete against the proffesionals then ripped my heart out of my mouth by going through a barb wire fence and slashing all 4 legs.

yep shes deffinatly special.

but to stay with me she would be wasted. she would do very little in the next 12 months some days I may not even be able to get to see her.

see it was all the above that made me allow the trial, trying to find somebody that would stay intouch and love her as much as i do. Id had high profile homes after her, para olympic dressage rider, showing people .. I choose the lesser people closer to home.

sorry guys ive rambled.. am going to see her tonight and will decide there and then what happens, im not going to force the people in to paying as the money isnt the the main issue here.
 
I also was bitten a few years ago letting a horse go on trial, and it failed the vetting due to a sore back from them riding lopsided :( I had it back, rested it, they then got it vetted again and bought it, but I have never gone down that road again.

However - I have sold a lot of home bred youngsters, and just started horses, and I love that gut feeling when you know it is the right home.

Have you got that gut feeling?
 
Having seen the same sort of thing I really would advise you to try to find her a more mature person who knows youngsters......

On my yard a really lovely young horse has been ruined by a rider with no real experience of young horses...

Hope she finds the home she deserves......
 
It sounds to me that your mare could well go back to her old ways if not treated with respect, it takes a long time to build up trust with these animals. The Novice who has her now isn't taking the time to build up any relationship with her at all , just expecting her to do it.

She's a mare after all - you have to ask nicely
 
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