It is doing my head in... (sorry a bit long and rambling).

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ginnyspinner

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As some of you may know, while my ankle was healing, I had Carly on full livery (14 weeks). During this time she has had a variety of riders, due to quick staff turnaround!! at the yard. Recently, she has been ridden by the new girl, who has really taken to her.
At the moment, I am riding nearly every other day, but the yard owner and the girl who has been riding her seem to have taken over my mare. The girl is schooling her and to be honest it is driving me mad - the poor mare never gets a day off!! This full livery thing takes all control away from the owner. They decide when she comes in, when she goes out, what she eats, when she eat it, whether she has a haynet etc etc. Aarghh I could scream. When I ride, they look at each other as if to say, "we will sort the mare and school her properly".
The yard itself is well situated, private estate, ace hacking, fab school etc but this is driving me insane. I do not want to move, but at the mo, feel as if I will never be able to regain my mare - even if I went back onto DIY (difficult with work at the moment).
Do you think I am being over possessive? Should i just relax and go with the flow? I have never done full livery before, always DIY, so maybe I am being super sensitive. It is really unsettling me though. Husband thinks I should be more assertive - tell them what she does and when she does it, but it is not always that easy, especially given the personalities involved.
Any opinions/advice welcomed.
 
Is there any way you could put her on part livery. If she is ridden every other day that is enough riding so with part livery it will mean that all the riding is down to you. Also could you come to an agreement where by you do all the work on your days off. That way at least some of the time you get to bring her in turn her out feed her etc etc.
 
Never forget she's your horse. If the YO gets difficult about following instructions about someone else's horse then they need to reconsider how they make their living. Good luck.
 
i agree witrh halfpass, try 'part-liv' that way they do the mucking out etc but you ride and could possibly gain more control by having to dictate her turnout etc around when you can get there. also her hay and feeds etc?

good luck - just remember shes your horse and you pay the bills!
 
It sounds like you have a lovely horse and everyone is dotting over her and enjoying doing so. Its a difficult one because you have received a good network of support and you dont want to offend them and spoil things.

I would perhaps get around the matter by saying pennies are getting a little tight and you need to reduce your bill, by not having your mare ridden as often. Also you can say that you are now recovering and wish to establish your bond with her again and this cant be done by more than one rider.

I am a firm believer in a one to one partnership when ever possible as it strengthens the relationship with you and your horse. Not to say that other riders can not bring other qualities and help you both along the way, but there is a time as you are saying when you want your mare to yourself.

I am sure they will understand, the yard is obviously very good and the people there sound excellent. They will want the best for you both and I am sure their intentions have been very good along the way. It is very hard to watch your own horse with another person on board and you are not unusual to feel pangs about this.

I am sure you will resolve this.
 
My horse is on full livery and I am in a lucky situation that the YO does tend to consult me first if she wants to change anything WRT my horse - Ie feed/turnout regime etc. Personally if I were you I would try to regain a bit of control here by perhaps reducing the number of days your mare is worked by others - I agree you need to do this in a tactful way but you need to start regaining some control here.
 
Blimey they sound a bit overpowering. I think they need to remember that they are there to provide a service for you. Full livery is for your benefit and not theirs.. after all you are paying for it. You wouldnt go to the hairdressers and expect them to do what they want ..... you could end up looking like Britney instead of having a trim!!!

I think you need to put your foot down a bit and lay down some ground rules of how you want your horse looked after and exercised. If you want to exercise your own horse then so be it, after all its why you have her. I think they have taken advantage of your obvious good nature.

.....and if they dont like it then Im really sorry to say you may be better off moving yards.

Good luck.
 
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