Lesson number 2 - nerves!

[SaddlePsych'D]

I posted a few weeks ago about getting back into riding after a long time off https://forums.horseandhound.co.uk/threads/returning-to-riding.784217/ . I previously just had lessons but I think got to a reasonable standard - walk, trot, canter, (very!) little jumps, and lateral moves - but I've never been particularly confident (although better on a few horses I got on particularly well with).

Well I went back for lesson number 2 today and just felt quite disappointed with myself afterwards. At the start of my lesson another horse got loose from the yard and was having a bit of an excitable moment along the outside of the school. The horse I was on was fine - just turned around a bit quick to have a look - but of course it was only my second time riding him so my first thought was 'crap is he going to join in the party?!' (he did not). I'd already been a bit nervous so we did the lesson on the lunge which I don't think I've done before so that was good. I felt a bit useless because I really struggled to get much trot going even with the instructor helping although we both thought maybe a slowcoach day might be a good thing given my nerves. I guess it's just hard when I think back to what I have done in the past - I often had private lessons and could at least get the horse going around the whole school and change direction etc.

Anyway I'm kind of weighing up what to do next - to stick with it and see if my confidence builds up as I get used to the horse, or maybe just accept riding is something I'm not right for. I'm guessing others might have been in this place. Any advice would be much appreciated.

 

[Red-1]

If I was on an unfamiliar horse and one got loose and was hooligan-ing around outside, I would be worried too, and I am normally quite confident! Well done for keeping going when he whipped round to have a look.

Lunge lessons are great, but in a lunge lesson the trainer is meant to keep the horse going, so don't blame yourself too much for that one. Maybe the horse was not performing as he should on that day, and that could be for many reasons.

I certainly would not give up if you want to get going again. Be kind to yourself, especially if you are out of practice.

If you are not enjoying it after a couple more sessions, then I would switch yards and see how a different one feels. The current one (loose horse and a horse that the trainer could not keep going) does not sound ideal for everyone, even if they are generally good.

 

[Rumtytum]

Agree with Red-1, and would add that your lesson could just have been one of those ‘rubbish’ ones which we probably all have now and again (I do for sure, like yesterday’s). Well done you for getting through the scary moment and what a lovely calm horse you had! Hopefully you’ll decide to have a few more lessons on him, get to know him better which will build your confidence and that might be all that’s needed to get you both moving more forward.

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

If I was on an unfamiliar horse and one got loose and was hooligan-ing around outside, I would be worried too, and I am normally quite confident! Well done for keeping going when he whipped round to have a look.

Lunge lessons are great, but in a lunge lesson the trainer is meant to keep the horse going, so don't blame yourself too much for that one. Maybe the horse was not performing as he should on that day, and that could be for many reasons.

I certainly would not give up if you want to get going again. Be kind to yourself, especially if you are out of practice.

If you are not enjoying it after a couple more sessions, then I would switch yards and see how a different one feels. The current one (loose horse and a horse that the trainer could not keep going) does not sound ideal for everyone, even if they are generally good.

Thank you, that has given me a bit of hope and some things to think about. In fairness to the yard I think it was a client who left a stable door open and the horse (which apparently this is very unusual for) took his chance! And maybe the instructor was just being a bit cautious about pushing the horse on as I'd said I was feeling a bit wobbled. It seems a nice yard so I'll have a think about going back or having a look around.

I meant to make a post a while ago about BHS vs ABRS vs no accreditation for riding schools - does it matter hugely as long as they are insured/licensed?

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

Agree with Red-1, and would add that your lesson could just have been one of those ‘rubbish’ ones which we probably all have now and again (I do for sure, like yesterday’s). Well done you for getting through the scary moment and what a lovely calm horse you had! Hopefully you’ll decide to have a few more lessons on him, get to know him better which will build your confidence and that might be all that’s needed to get you both moving more forward.

Thank you. He was good really, just having a nosy at the shenanigans I suppose! He is the instructor's home bred horse and I think can go very nicely, maybe he knows I'm a bit hesitant.

 

[PaintPonies]

Definitely don't give yourself a hard time. Work on building up confidence - it doesn't matter if you spend the entire lesson in walk from time to time at this early stage. Make sure you explain to your instructor if you are feeling a bit nervous. They should be able to give you things to do to keep your mind busy with what you're doing rather than worrying. You'll get there

 

[Trinket12]

Sometimes you can have crap lessons. I have had days where I feel great and Sugar is doing what she's supposed to be doing, and then other lesson's where it's just not working for a variety of reasons and I end the lesson thinking about taking up stamp collecting instead!

Go easy on yourself, there will be off days, you are riding a living breathing animal that is not going to be 100% every day. Much in the same way human's aren't either. When I have lessons I focus on 3 things that went well, it doesn't matter how small they are (not walking off from the mounting block, getting my right diagonal) they will change for you every time. But I think it's very easy to focus on the negative and get stuck there.

 

[EllenJay]

In my experience you learn more when things go wrong than you do when things go right. You are on "Lesson 2" - with horses you never stop learning, even after a brilliant lesson, there are always things that need working on/improving. And on the flip side, there is always something you can look back on with a smile

 

[claret09]

don't give up you will get there

 

[HazuraJane]

Crap lessons and crap response days from your horse (either your own, or a lesson horse) will happen.
(For me, as recently as twice this past week, haha!)
If you can narrow your focus while riding to only doing well whatever the instructor is teaching, it helps.
Also, keep that narrowed focus going so that time becomes irrelevant. Your instructor is watching the clock, you don't have to.
Finally, if you do exercise outside the riding - walking a few miles a day, other exercises for core and balance, it helps quite a bit.