Loan pony dilemma

Brandy

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Ok this will be long and possibly somewhat pointless but please bear with me. I'll try to cut it short!

I own two equines, my old Tb aged 29 and my little pony aged 24. Two and a half years ago a friend asked me to take her pony to bring on to sell, she hadn't the time or ability herself. So my little one went to friend and her pony came to me. It quickly became obvious that he was not going to be easy. He had been professionally broken in as a 5 yr old at a dressage yard and when good was very very good but there was no way on earth he was going to be sellable in a couple of months. My old boy was practically retired to was nice to have somethign to ride so I kept my friends pony and found loan home for my little one. ittle one is now in second loan home until march when she will come back. I was under the impression that as I had my friends pony, she would have mine back but apparently its not that simple (event hough she keeps her at home and pony is no trouble) and she has told me that if I don;t want her pony anymore I can find a new home for him.

I am not sure if my current arrangement (livery) will let me have another there, nor if I can afford it.

I don't want to keep farming MY little pony out on loan. She is fab and if I could find a good home I would but the last two have appeared to be great only to not want herafter a year.

Friends pony is difficult. I like him, but he is a bit too small (height wise, he can easily carry me but I wouldn't buy somethign this small) I am beginning to not enjoy riding and my confidence is being knocked. He is not good to hack and that is all I can do winter time, yesterday I took him for a walk in hand for gods sake.

My loyalty is to my old horse who I will keep to the end of his days. Honestly, once he is gone I will get another but by then I may be a nervous wreck (I am really really not normally nervous, old horse was a proper loon) and also to my pony.

Not sure what to do about friends pony, I could send him back which would I think put somewhat of a strain on our friendship and also I'm not sure I could live with the guilt.

I always 'keep for life' and this is transferring itself onto friends pony. BUT. I'm not really enjoying it that much. aaagh.

Any advice?
 
Can you not put up your friends pony to sell. From reading your post my impression is that you just had him to bring on to sell? So sell on and bring your pony home? Sorry if I'm missing something!
 
Explain all this to her - if she's a friend worth keeping she'll work out a solution. If she's funny about it - well it's her pony, she's not worth keeping as a friend and she HAS to have him back so just take him back.
 
Sorry didn't explain it well. The pony is difficult, he took 9 months to settle when he came to me, he is not 'anyones' pony and takes a long long time to build up trust. It was decided not to sell him, as I am fairly sure he would be sent straight back - not that he is awful with me but I think he would be a nightmare for months once moved and right back to square one.

I feel a level of respobsibility to him. And worry about what would happen to him if I passed him on. If there is autism in horses I am sure he has it. (this is not a flippant comment btw and not meant to offend anyone)

Sorry probably was a pointless post, just feeling down about it and somewhat trapped.
 
Send the friends pony back. It really isn't your problem that she doesn't want it any more, as its owner she has a legal responsibility - or has she signed him over to you, and you are now the legal owner?

Obvioulsy, have your little horse back. I'm assuming that the cost of livery for the other pony is being met by its owner (if it's not now yours).

Give her a date on which the pony must be collected - in writing, together with a final bill for your costs.
 
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Explain to your friend that your pony is coming back and that you cannot afford livery for her pony too and so she will have to have him back.

I accept that you have become attached to him and you feel that he will be difficult to sell, but at the end of the day he's not your problem.

I'm sure that if you explain that you just simply cannot afford to keep him when your own pony comes back, she will understand. As her to collect him by a certain date and stick to it. Good luck.
 
Brandy said:
and she has told me that if I don;t want her pony anymore I can find a new home for him.

Just wanted to add that its not that simple - you can't sell/loan out somebody else's horse. Leave that up to her.
 
He is not your responsibility, no matter how guilty you feel, your own aged pony is, so feel more guilty about dumping her on other people. It wont be doing that pony to be repeatedly moved at 24 years old. You've done your best for your friend, if they can't apperciate that then be firm, give her notice & stick up for yourself for your own pony's sake. You may give a home for life, but at the moment you aren't giving your own pony (who is your responsibility) a home for life. Sorry if it sounds harsh, but that's how I see it. If she's any kind of adult you'll be able to talk to her, if not then she'll have to grow up quickly & start taking care of her own horse who is her problem.
 
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