need some advice :( :(

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chancing

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my boy has just come back into work after a few weeks off due to moving and bad weather etc etc. hes FRESH and im new ish. been offered to go for a hack tomorrow through some fields and never really done it with him apart from when i tried him and he was a totally different horse. so what do i do? wimp out and say no thanks or insist on nice quiet hack and a walk/trot to see how he is in the fields. how can i say this without looking daft?

also any tips etc on settling him into this new place hes hyper!!
 
I would either lunge or school before you hack to take a wee bit of the freshness out.

Definitely go BUT insist it is at your pace, don't be worried to say no to a canter or anything like that. You need to buid your confidence with him. Any kind of friend will respect your decision.

Sometimes it is best to grit your teeth and just do it, (trust me I know! The last few hacks on my horse have been very stressful to say the least but I have kept going and am seeing a light at the end of the tunnel :) )

Go and enjoy :)

It will take time to settle in, I don't think I felt my gelding settled until about a year and a half - 2 years in! :eek: .

Look at this diet and make sure it is not too high in sugars/cereals etc. Cut out sugars, keep to a regular routine and you will find he will settle.

Good luck :)
 
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It'd be a shame not to go. I'd explain that you would like a quiet hack, and I wouldn't trot if you are worried.
Can you lunge beforehand? This might just take the edge off

You don't need to worry about looking daft, the person your going with should understand your worries

As to getting him relaxed in his new place, i'd try to establish a proper routine. He gets turned out at x time and gets brought in at x time, that sort of thing. On top of it all you have to be relaxed!! good luck
 
i agree with all your suggestions the problems being however
-hes only just learning to be lunged as hes done it once or twice in his life and at the moment this causes more excitement
-ive only just moved to this yard and the only people to ride out with are kids and its someones mum who has organised this. I cant see how im going to point out to a 15 year old boy who rides like a mad thing i only want to walk and possibly trot.

i really dont know what to do? i feel that a canter to tickle his toes would be good for him and maybe help him to settle at the same time i dont want to be killed and or/ have my confidence knocked.
He is my first and i was very confident till i had a very nasty fall involving a car therefore now im working so hard on rebuilding my confidence which has been going really well.
 
I am in a very similar position to you and personally I don't think this lad sounds like the ideal hacking partner! I have been breaking the tedium of schooling by walking my girl quietly round the village with someone on foot but yesterday I got the feeling in the school that she could really do with a good blast and as I don't feel quite ready for that yet my Yard Manager is going to take her out for me tomorrow and do just that.

Do you have anyone you could ask to take him out for you? Also you might want to consider a new yard with more like minded people to hack with I know it has done me the world of good!

Whatever you decide good luck x
 
I'd say go with your gut feeling, and to me that is saying that you don't feel safe yet...

I'd stick to slower hacks. Be honest - thank the lady and boy for offering, but say you've had some hiccups lately and that you only feel ready for slower work for now. Say that you wouldn't want to be a boring companion for him. It may turn out that they are quite happy to go slowly and at your pace, but if they aren't - well at least you know before you get out there!

If you have any worries re your or his confidence, take it slower than you need to - its much harder to regain than it is to lose! Theres no shame in building up slowly.

ps. It sounds like it would do you the world of good to find an instructor to help you work on your confidence in the school initially and then on the roads. You could get help from them with your lungeing and build up to cantering with them too - its win win really...
 
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I definitely wouldn't canter yet.. I wouldn't even trot in your situation!
If I was you I'd sort the lunging out to establish a connection with your horse and build up your confidence, can you get someone to walk out with you on foot? I definitely wouldn't ride with anyone who wouldn't respect my limits.
 
MMmmm I see your worry :-( Although as others have said, if you explain your worry I am sure they will support you. Even 15 year old boys can be sensible! :D

Is there anyone on the yard who is slightly more mature with a nanny kind of horse?

Do you have an instructor or experienced friend who can help you hack out? Or even advertise for someone to hack with.

Lungeing doesn't work with all horses, mine gets more excited by the lunge too. You can also get someone to ride him for you temporarily, getting on for the last section and gradually increase the time until you feel ready. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

I think also take some pressure of yourself, don't be in too much of a rush, if you don't feel ready don't do it. Take small steps, build up your bond with him. Give him as much turnout as possible and stick to a good solid routine.

You will get there :)
 
nuttynugget said:
I definitely wouldn't canter yet.. I wouldn't even trot in your situation!
If I was you I'd sort the lunging out to establish a connection with your horse and build up your confidence, can you get someone to walk out with you on foot? I definitely wouldn't ride with anyone who wouldn't respect my limits.
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It does sound like a bit of a disaster waiting to happen. You are obviously nervous (so would I be!) and with a fresh new horse that you dont really know it is not the best combination.
Lots of ground work to establish a bond, a lot of halts to establish control, one rein stops, and slow work to ensure you're not going to be tanked off with. I would be very wary of anyone taking him to give him a 'blast' too, it is not teaching control.
 
Nigsha said:
It does sound like a bit of a disaster waiting to happen. You are obviously nervous (so would I be!) and with a fresh new horse that you dont really know it is not the best combination.
Lots of ground work to establish a bond, a lot of halts to establish control, one rein stops, and slow work to ensure you're not going to be tanked off with. I would be very wary of anyone taking him to give him a 'blast' too, it is not teaching control.
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When I say blast I just meant a good long controlled canter I certainly wouldn't be allowing my horse to gallop uncontrollably as the reason for my accident was due to her following a bolting horse! Just feel they sometimes need to blow away the cobwebs and then they settle down :)
 
i would be honest and explain that you are worried/nervous about going faster than a walk as it's a new yard and he's a bit fresh. ask them to just go around one field and escort you back if they really want to go faster than a walk/trot.

i know my horse wouldn't do anything majorly stupid even when he's at his 'freshest' but i do worry about going through the fields (only in the last year though!) so i only go with people who know my fears and are prepared to walk and talk to me to help keep me calm!
i had my first ride in a field on sunday in over a year, he was ok to start with but got a bit on his toes after about 10 mins, i knew the person i was with would stay walking regardless of what happened and she kept talking to me about anything and everything and encouraged me to talk. i got back to the yard feeling really pleased that i had ridden in a field again.
i used to gallop through fields on a regular basis on my own and in company, i'd escort other horses out and they would bolt in a field and my lad would just look at them as if to say "idiots, save your energy", he never took off. but something over this last year has put me off being in fields.

what i'm saying is that you will have to be honest to the people you want to ride out with and don't worry about looking bad or anything, i don't care what people think of my fears. it's human nature to be scared! ;)
 
thankyou guys for all of your advice I dont have anyone I can get to help me and at the moment paying for livery is enough of a struggle however I have just started a new job after moving home and its not long till pay day. Im planning on having lessons every week for an hour as I think it will really help.

I dont know anyone at the yard well enough to trust them with my precious boy and when I say blast i meant a nice steady canter to blow away a few cobwebs.

I will keep you updated thankyou all very much x
 
I would get the lunging sorted out, it really helped my get my boy settled in. It a safe way for them to let off steam and to learn to respect you. I spent ages jumping mine on the lunge before I dared jump him myself. Mine likes a good buck too so rather he did it on the lunge than with me on his back!
And defo find someone chilled to hack out with. Take it all really steady, I lost my confidence and it took me a year to get it back so don't push yourself out of your comfort zone just yet. it's your horse and you can do whatever you like with him so just enjoy.
 
well today was the day thought i would get on in the school first and get a little of the freshness out in a calm cool way as lunging excites him more. got both feet in the stirrups began to walk and we were off bucking etc and spooking and i couldnt stop needless to say confidence now rock rock bottom :( and im afraid an advert has gone up to see if i get any interest. hes too much and im going to have to admit that
 
Ah I'm sorry to hear that. f you're sure its what you want, then its probaly better you get a horse on which you can have fun and feel safe. After all they cost too much money and time and heartache not toenjoy them
 
aww hun I really feel for you its bad enough having a horse you think you can't cope with (this was me 3 weeks ago!) without having to cope on your own. Would your yard owner/ manager not help you at all? Even if they could give you a bit of on the floor support or help you with your lunging? If not perhaps it might be worth looking around for a more supportive yard? or alternatively what about advertising for an experienced sharer? That way you could find someone who can not only help exercise your boy but also maybe make a small financial contribution.

There is nothing wrong in admitting a horse is too much for you its very brave but I'd hate you to feel forced into it without exploring all the options x
 
since october/november time :( not long at all but in that time ive gone from being so confident and been hunting etc and planning on competing this summer to frightened to hack alone or ride in open spaces :(
 
I would look at his management, I went through hell with mine winter before last, he kept chucking me off, bucking, spooking, napping etc and I lost all my confidence. What are you feeding? Is he having enough turnout? Mine was at a livery yard eating haylage, applechaff and hifibre cubes with only an hours' turnout per day and he was just mental and totally ruined my confidence, to the point where it would take me 20 mins to get on him and I would be shaking and in tears.
In the end I moved him to a quieter yard where he gets all-day turnout, soaked hay, lite chaff and calmer if we're planning an outing. No cereals or molasses, minimum rugs too. He still has his moments but on the whole he is a different horse, and my bravery has well and truly returned!

Don't give up yet! They are all very silly at the moment because of the rubbish winter we have had and the fact that spring is round the corner. He is probably still just testing you out as well.
 
I agree with the diet thing, look at the starch content in his diet. A lot of feeds say low starch but are still around 15% which isn't low at all. It can make a huge difference. Also, it is still really early days and he has to get used to everything new, you, surroundings, everything. Even the most placid horse can change when it is moved. What is his routine like. If it is really different from before he might be struggling to get used to it.

Apart from being hyper, you haven't said that he has actually done anything wrong (unless i missed something). I would look at diet, routine, work on building up a bond on the ground and book some lessons with an instructor that you trust.
It seems a bit early to give up.
 
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