MM2017
New User
Would really appreciate any insights...
I have my first horse as an adult - a 17hh gelding/ warmblood/12 years old who has done a bit of everything. I am lucky enough to be surrounded by lots of supportive people on the yard. However, I am beginning to lose my confidence. Although we are having lessons together, he has taken to tanking off with me in the menage either in or out of lessons. It seems to be growing into a habit, and although I can turn him, I constantly worry that he is going to "go". This is a vicious circle as my anxiety is then picked up by him next time I ride and so on... He has had his teeth and back checked and all is in good shape. I do not believe that horses take the mickey on purpose, but also suspect that he does not respect me as much as he could and needs to. My confidence is knocked even more when some of the people on the yard say things like "you need to decide if he's the horse for you", "show him who's boss" or "you need a stronger bit in him" - it makes me question my and my instructors' judgment, who seem to have more confidence in me. The best case interpretation of these people on the yard is that they mean well, but it makes me over think the situation even more, and my nervousness is projected onto the poor horse and no doubt tension. When he goes well, he goes really well, but his napping can be unnerving. Some of me wonders if it's a respect problem, or if he just feels uncomfortable with me on his back. Not sure how to identify what it is to be able to correct it. I feel I need to first better my mindset, but easier said than done; know that I can stay on him when he naps; and keep going for now. This morning, for example, I could feel he was about to "go" and corrected it quickly, but then spent the rest of our schooling session slightly on edge that he'd go again, which held me back from pushing him as I'd like in case he exploded.
Any ideas??
I have my first horse as an adult - a 17hh gelding/ warmblood/12 years old who has done a bit of everything. I am lucky enough to be surrounded by lots of supportive people on the yard. However, I am beginning to lose my confidence. Although we are having lessons together, he has taken to tanking off with me in the menage either in or out of lessons. It seems to be growing into a habit, and although I can turn him, I constantly worry that he is going to "go". This is a vicious circle as my anxiety is then picked up by him next time I ride and so on... He has had his teeth and back checked and all is in good shape. I do not believe that horses take the mickey on purpose, but also suspect that he does not respect me as much as he could and needs to. My confidence is knocked even more when some of the people on the yard say things like "you need to decide if he's the horse for you", "show him who's boss" or "you need a stronger bit in him" - it makes me question my and my instructors' judgment, who seem to have more confidence in me. The best case interpretation of these people on the yard is that they mean well, but it makes me over think the situation even more, and my nervousness is projected onto the poor horse and no doubt tension. When he goes well, he goes really well, but his napping can be unnerving. Some of me wonders if it's a respect problem, or if he just feels uncomfortable with me on his back. Not sure how to identify what it is to be able to correct it. I feel I need to first better my mindset, but easier said than done; know that I can stay on him when he naps; and keep going for now. This morning, for example, I could feel he was about to "go" and corrected it quickly, but then spent the rest of our schooling session slightly on edge that he'd go again, which held me back from pushing him as I'd like in case he exploded.
Any ideas??