Noobie RIder says hello to everyone

[IrishRegulus]

Hi folks,

Just registered so thought I'd say hello to the community and a thank you, in advance for any sage advice given.

I'm a complete noob to riding - in fact, have only had two lessons under me...but I think it's safe to say that I am hooked - wake up in the morning and wish I could swap my car for a horse..and keep him.her in the driveway.

Anyway, I'm a boy and I've been havin a few problems with my typically ungelded nether regions....rising trot has already resulted in a few semi-embarrassing moments of my asking: erm..can you look away for a moment, miss?...while I make some downstairs adjustments...or a total horror of everything dropping out on the rise and, I tell you, coming down on your own bits and bobs...rather unpleasant, to say the least...I know it's all laughs and winks after..but, at the time, it's painful, embarrassing and ruins my focus. I have to stop, adjust and continue...not ideal

Now, to date, I have not seen another boy at my livery barn...so whilst I get plenty of sympathy...I'm not really feeling the empathy ladies...so this question is for the boys out there Clearly one should not be hitting one's gear against pommels or saddles, so I'm wondering if this is quite normal for males learning the real basic fundamentals?

Does the riding gentleman sport something extra under his jods. One male rider I met said he doubled-up on tight undies..one over another..haha.

Sorry for the nature of this post. Happy riding everyone! and thanks for reading

 

[TrasaM]

I always though that was why men learned riding trot so quickly..pain being a great teacher lol. I remember wondering,when I started to do rising trot, how men managed to cope with this phase of learning..well now I know.
Have fun and sit up on your seat bones and remember it's more a hip thrusting action than up and down
You can practice this at home..home is best because if you do it in public people will stare Stand with knees bent as you would when riding then whilst keeping your head from bobbing up and down thrust hips forwards so that the motion in your body is from waist to knees whilst lower leg and head stay in the same position .. Have fun

 

[IrishRegulus]

I always though that was why men learned riding trot so quickly..pain being a great teacher lol. I remember wondering,when I started to do rising trot, how men managed to cope with this phase of learning..well now I know.
Have fun and sit up on your seat bones and remember it's more a hip thrusting action than up and down
You can practice this at home..home is best because if you do it in public people will stare Stand with knees bent as you would when riding then whilst keeping your head from bobbing up and down thrust hips forwards so that the motion in your body is from waist to knees whilst lower leg and head stay in the same position .. Have fun

Yip, it's certainly a persuasive incentive to conquer the technique..hey, I tried your recommendation...secreted myself away in the dining room....dunno if you ever watched them, but it really reminded me of Vic and Bob in Shooting Stars emulating the dirty old leech..haha...still, I tell you, as soon as I got into position, all those little baby stabilising muscle my body's trying to build screamed out in unison...and that's good sign I've replicated the movement.

When I watch competent riders, they don't come flying off the saddle each time nad you're right - you can see the pelvis just rocking back and forward. I was trying this just walking...back and forward, back and forward...could feel it...but when I upped a gear into trot...bouncy bum again. That's what I can't understand...should I be thrusting forward went the bounce (impulse?) occurs, letting the rise of his back translate into my forward thrust. I got it briefly yesterday...just for a moment I was in time with the horse...felt brilliant...and then I heard a call about my heels or elbows or steering...I thought about them...and...well, you know what they say about multitasking...but at least I know I *can* do it, albeit briefly. I really don't like the bouncing, apart from the potential boy pain...when I leave that saddle, there's a breakdown in communication...sometimes, he just stops...which isn't helpful for getting the balance.

Anyhow, I could go on and on...so wanted to thank you to your response and the great advice...at the moment my spirit has more enthusiasm than my body can keep up with. MY legs haven't felt like this since those horrific cross-country runs in schools so I'd imagine that things will become considerably easier once my legs get up to strength and aren't so stiff all the time.

Great fun and great exercise. Glad I decided to do it! thanks again!!

 

[TrasaM]

Yes, remember the Vic and bob sketch I was told to stick my chest out and think Jordan!
Yes, you allow the rise in the horses back to push you up and forwards..but not too much up. If you mistime it and come back into the saddle behind the horses movement then that's when you will start get bumped . Ie his back coming up will meet your butt coming down! . As you progress you will learn to use your seat to slow or speed up the trot - but you're not quite at that stage yet. You've started well though ; feeling the movement in walk and relaxing allowing your hips to stay with the horses movement.
Ive not been riding that long so all those early struggles of coordinating hips hands and legs whilst trying to stay relaxed without collapsing..too much to think about. When my RI first out my legs so that my feet weren't sticking out it seemed the most unnatural position ever. Then one day I realised I was doing it without thinking about it. Same with rising trot. At first it'd be just a few strides then gradually it all fell into place.
Would your instructor be willing to put you on the lunge for part of each lesson? That way you can concentrate on your position without using the reins for balance and pulling on the horses mouth.

I'm surprised none of the 'boys' have come along to offer advice.?

 

[IrishRegulus]

Yes, remember the Vic and bob sketch I was told to stick my chest out and think Jordan!
Yes, you allow the rise in the horses back to push you up and forwards..but not too much up. If you mistime it and come back into the saddle behind the horses movement then that's when you will start get bumped . Ie his back coming up will meet your butt coming down! . As you progress you will learn to use your seat to slow or speed up the trot - but you're not quite at that stage yet. You've started well though ; feeling the movement in walk and relaxing allowing your hips to stay with the horses movement.
Ive not been riding that long so all those early struggles of coordinating hips hands and legs whilst trying to stay relaxed without collapsing..too much to think about. When my RI first out my legs so that my feet weren't sticking out it seemed the most unnatural position ever. Then one day I realised I was doing it without thinking about it. Same with rising trot. At first it'd be just a few strides then gradually it all fell into place.
Would your instructor be willing to put you on the lunge for part of each lesson? That way you can concentrate on your position without using the reins for balance and pulling on the horses mouth.

I'm surprised none of the 'boys' have come along to offer advice.?

Aye. we've been doing some lunges - my proper RI will be back next week - the other was just filling in; but, she's been great in giving me loads to think about off the saddle.
The 'boys' are non-existant in my barn - I'm not complaining...I feel special, being the only ungelded male in the barn..hahaha...could be, though, that the 'boys' don't want to talk about the elephant in the room re. rising trot and dull, innard-crunching pain from a bad come down which, essentially, means 'cr*p riding skill'...or could be the old-fashioned manly, I'm in dire pain here but not going to admit it in front of the ladies...who knows?

Good things are: I'm *much* less reliant on the reins for balance...I try to keep my hands low...kinda feeling the bite on the rein, takking up the slack but not using them for balance...and, holy buggery...that's when the leg pain starts hoping that's a good sign of these mythical stabilising muscles firing up... couldbe, for me, I need to feel a good, comfy, solid balance first and then work on the others...but,as you said, it's everything at once and, then, take into account individual learning style and personal fitness...if my legs were stronger in the right places I could practice more, etc. whilst I've no burning desire for dressage, I do want to establish a nice technique from the start and, upon which I have a good foundation to build upon.

I'll get there - in time for the good weather coming in, hopefully Thanks again!

 

[IrishRegulus]

Yes, remember the Vic and bob sketch I was told to stick my chest out and think Jordan!
Yes, you allow the rise in the horses back to push you up and forwards..but not too much up. If you mistime it and come back into the saddle behind the horses movement then that's when you will start get bumped . Ie his back coming up will meet your butt coming down! . As you progress you will learn to use your seat to slow or speed up the trot - but you're not quite at that stage yet. You've started well though ; feeling the movement in walk and relaxing allowing your hips to stay with the horses movement.
Ive not been riding that long so all those early struggles of coordinating hips hands and legs whilst trying to stay relaxed without collapsing..too much to think about. When my RI first out my legs so that my feet weren't sticking out it seemed the most unnatural position ever. Then one day I realised I was doing it without thinking about it. Same with rising trot. At first it'd be just a few strides then gradually it all fell into place.
Would your instructor be willing to put you on the lunge for part of each lesson? That way you can concentrate on your position without using the reins for balance and pulling on the horses mouth.

I'm surprised none of the 'boys' have come along to offer advice.?

Did a full circuit today of rising trot and not a sore gonad in sight! RI says I've got it...so happy right now)) btw, re. certain motivators...I've found a nose full of horse f*rt does wonders for not wanting to fall back into a walk! thanks so much for the advice...I practiced and practiced like you said - it really helped!!

 

[TrasaM]

Really pleased the advice worked but not as pleased as your gonads are I suspect
Sounds like you've got it nailed and from here on in it should get easier. I'm looking forward to the updates for when you start cantering

 

[IrishRegulus]

Really pleased the advice worked but not as pleased as your gonads are I suspect
Sounds like you've got it nailed and from here on in it should get easier. I'm looking forward to the updates for when you start cantering

Hey You did say get back when I started cantering....
Well, I've had a few goes so far..the first was when my RI introduced a crop cos I was finding it difficult squeezin him with every down on the rising trot, if you know what I mean...at the start it was just pure info overload...I swear I was so confused I probably would've ended up squeezing with my elbows and grabbing the reins with my calves! haha..anyway, in the confusion my little crop tapping most have gotten a lttle more frantic and, right on the corner, my poor mount went into canter...boy, was I not expecting that on the rise! well, good things were that I was able to stop him with no damage save my fragile little mind..haha...so, about a week later, we did a canter again...one hand on the pommel, the other hand grasping the reins...Oh...my..God...I'll be honest, it was a little scarey...I felt like a lil paper boat on top of a tsunami...i guess I tensed, lost my seat...all well and good in theory, but in the moment - that's another thing...then, as I was slinking my sorry behind off, I caught sight of two young girls "sailing" around the indoor arena, cantering, rising trots...effortlessly...something to aim for..I guess, at 38, I'm really unfit...getting out of puff a lot, although my RI thinks that might be down to my not breathing correctly - could be on to something cos when we chat, I dont seem to get out of breath...anyway, there's my first cantering (ish) done...gosh, the quest for the "seat" is like the bloomin' holy grail for me

 

[TrasaM]

Hi..wondered how it was going yes, I recognise your description of first attempt to canter inside my brain was screaming EEeek! Too fast! Whoa! next time you'll know what to expect so it won't be quite so scary. It's just practice now. I started taking two lessons a week to get me through this phase otherwise I found that I'd forgotten what I'd learnt the previous week. You can do it! I started at 52 so you're just a youngling still
PS..yes don't forget to breathe.

 

[IrishRegulus]

Hi..wondered how it was going yes, I recognise your description of first attempt to canter inside my brain was screaming EEeek! Too fast! Whoa! next time you'll know what to expect so it won't be quite so scary. It's just practice now. I started taking two lessons a week to get me through this phase otherwise I found that I'd forgotten what I'd learnt the previous week. You can do it! I started at 52 so you're just a youngling still
PS..yes don't forget to breathe.

Well, after a totally duff lesson...I'm back on the lunge line...for some reason the rising trot has been completely exhausting me - to the point where I'm convinced I'm working *way* too hard...here's my suspicion...I have to be careful here because (a) human instinct is to see the problem elsewhere and not at home and (b) 99.9% of the mistakes are mine and mine alone and not the animal's...however, I ought not rule out animaly contributions to a problem.

I ride a school horse and I think he's become very dull to leg aids...should I have to constantly keep a leg-on a horse?...squeezes don't work...so I end up having to flappy mc flap kicks (I don't want to kick him...I love animals...but he don't do sugar...without a good thump...and then, sometimes, he just skips a gear and launches into canter. Cold be poor old sod deosn't feel it until i whack him "con mucha fuerza" and then he tries harder...and then I feel bad for having used too much force...awh...maybe I'm too soft...it goes against every iota of my nature to thump an animal..with any part of my body

RI tells me he's not like that with her...so, is it possible he's acting up *only* with me? the net's awash with stories of "be the alpha horse" and I'm wondering how important this is...could my horse's behaviour in the arena, being unresponsive...could that be cos he thinks he's number one and, tehrefore, couldn't give a fig for my lead or my cues? Do I have to get naked and douse myself in liquid Stallion dung and have a good old wrestle with him in the moonlight or what??

When I meet him at his stall...he often nudges me with his head...it's not something that bothers me until *he* whacks his nose off the visor of my riding hat...Ouch, I think...but nudging aside, is that him showing dominant behaviour...don't get me wrong...I'm not about keeping animals under brutish heel, but I do not want to be on a horse who has "alpha issues" When my backside sits atop, I don't want him thinking for himself etc...I want him to do, only, what I command.

So, do you think these nudges are him telling me that: I accept you into the pack but you're lower than me. Could this be why he's "dull" to the aids...or is he ridden day after day by many different people, some of whom without a clue? If so, would lunging him for five before a lesson get him a bit more tuned in...should I start arranging my lessons for first thing in the day to get him fresh.

if this is a dominance thing then I'd llike to be able to identify it so I can (a) get another horse for the time being or (b) address/fix issue when I know what I'm doing.

What do you think?

 

[LuLu2]

Hey

Its possible he could be dull to your aids because your still learning and finding your balance. Parts of your body are probably telling him go, whilst other parts are saying slow/stop. He sounds like he's just reacting to the mixed signals your unintentionally giving him.
Yes, you could ask for a more forward going horse but he/she will be much less forgiving of your mistakes, instead of slowing down theres a good chance he/she would speed up.

He shouldn't be pushing you around, Its not necessarily dominant behavour but it is a bad habit that he has learned.

I enjoy reading your posts and welcome to the forum.

 

[TrasaM]

He sounds just like the horse I lead most of my first lessons on. He was/ is a total lout to anyone on the ground within head butting distance. That's just bad manners and maybe an expression of his discontent with his life in a RS just push his head away from you if he tries it.
As LuLu says horses are very quick to suss out the riders ability and some will happily take advantage of it if they can. I think the lunge lessons are a good idea as you can concentrate on balance and position without the leg flapping.

So hold back on the naked wrestling for a while yet it's not all about who's the Alpha either.

The one big thing I've learnt in my dealings with horses is that it is not force but intent which is important. As one trainer once advised me when I had a session on how to use schooling whip correctly..you have to have the intent because horses read minds
Right..brain out of order as just arrived in Cyprus and brain not functioning.
I'm really enjoying your updates too. Keep at it and expect dips..learning to ride does not appear to be a linear process

 

[buzzles]

Just read through this -sounds like you're doing really well and having fun which is the most important thing! Naked moonlight wrestling -brilliant!
Don't know where abouts in Ireland you are but if you're competant enough now in walk and trot, does your riding centre ever offer hacking? It's a great way to move on and if the horses are safe, to have your first canter. I'd start most people off with their first canter and jump out hacking as the horses here are really safe and know their job and using a steadier one the riders find it great as a canter on a straight forest track or a jump over a few logs is much easier than in the arena. They're not having to worry about turning or steering, just getting into a rhythm and can canter for longer so have more time to get used to it. The horses are also more forward outside and so it's not as much work for the rider to get them going or worry about correct legs or keeping them balanced, they can just go with it! Just an idea if you want to try something different, maybe see if it's an option in your centre. Also don't worry too much about the horses going better for you instructor - she's obviously a lot more experienced than you at this stage so the horses will know this and react accordingly.
Keep up the updates though - they're great

 

[IrishRegulus]

Hey

Its possible he could be dull to your aids because your still learning and finding your balance. Parts of your body are probably telling him go, whilst other parts are saying slow/stop. He sounds like he's just reacting to the mixed signals your unintentionally giving him.
Yes, you could ask for a more forward going horse but he/she will be much less forgiving of your mistakes, instead of slowing down theres a good chance he/she would speed up.

He shouldn't be pushing you around, Its not necessarily dominant behavour but it is a bad habit that he has learned.

I enjoy reading your posts and welcome to the forum.

Hi, thanks for replying
I think you're spot on...it's the only way, as when someone who knwos what they're doing is on him, he works away...yesterday, I was just walking him around and he was moving like a dream, so much so that it prompted my question: is he just walking the ring by himself? I think, though, whilst walking, I'm chilled and in control - my mind is relaxed; it knows, at that speed, there's plenty of time for all the little mini adjustments...and there's no mixed commands...maybe llike me unintentionaly pulling slightly at the reins whilst putting a leg-on...maybe moving my legs, even a little, is affecting my overall balance and I am, instinctively using the reins for balance? One thing is for certain - the longer I am at it, the more time my brain has to actually start processing what I am doing. As someone once said: there is knowing and there is knowing.

I suspect I am a lower-leg weakling and that's the main problem - I simply haven't generated enough strength in my calves and ankles to keep good contact...then, if I rise incorrectly (from the sturrip I suspect) I use heaps more energy...if I'm rising from the stirrups, I'm using more muscles to maintain ablance, stiffening up, weird rise...with my weakened legs now almost pushing out from the horse's sides...and, at that point, however breifly, I've stopped talking to him...and the result, he slows/stops.

He hasn't nudged me again and, now, I'm beginning to think it might even have been an accident or two. I mean, he really hasn't got a bad bone in his body, honestly...the other day, he moved his head towards me and I backed off a little, thinking he was going to nudge me...bt, instead his huge horse mouth just lingered around my nose and mouth, sniffing and breathing for a bit. I think I've also found some of his scratchy spots...when the saddle comes off he appreciates a rub/scratch on that part of his back.

Oh, yeah, after some thought I dedied a hot horse would *not* be good for me and my fledging interest in riding baby steps, baby steps...gotta get this rising trot sorted first and my reward for that will be cantering

 

[IrishRegulus]

He sounds just like the horse I lead most of my first lessons on. He was/ is a total lout to anyone on the ground within head butting distance. That's just bad manners and maybe an expression of his discontent with his life in a RS just push his head away from you if he tries it.
As LuLu says horses are very quick to suss out the riders ability and some will happily take advantage of it if they can. I think the lunge lessons are a good idea as you can concentrate on balance and position without the leg flapping.

So hold back on the naked wrestling for a while yet it's not all about who's the Alpha either.

The one big thing I've learnt in my dealings with horses is that it is not force but intent which is important. As one trainer once advised me when I had a session on how to use schooling whip correctly..you have to have the intent because horses read minds
Right..brain out of order as just arrived in Cyprus and brain not functioning.
I'm really enjoying your updates too. Keep at it and expect dips..learning to ride does not appear to be a linear process

Hey tbh, I think the horse would run in abject horror from a raging, ungelded, human male charging naked across the field...one time he got a little scared of me because I'd asked my RI to demonstrate the seated trot, and I was just running along beside them...and for a second he thought I was chasing him and got frigthened (awh) all 1200lbs

Hah...he's reading my mind that could be it - the ****** - he knows I'm too soft on him - he knows I have a pyschological barrier with using the crop - he knows I feel awful having to give him a hard kick He just wants to go back to his hay...he does love his hay.


Trth be told, I quite like lunge lessons - also thinking of signing up to a gym, if even just for a month and see whether I could build up some vitally needed lower leg muscles...as it stands at the moment, I really believe it's my level of fitness that is keeping me back...and who says the horse does the work? pah! my horse is, no doubt, continually amused at the panting ape on his back - his coat's as dry as a bone..but then, I've never seen him sporting a glass of wine and a cigarette

We will gallop one day...some day he just wants me to hurry up and bl**dy well learn so we can do fun things

Enjoy Cyprus!

 

[IrishRegulus]

Just read through this -sounds like you're doing really well and having fun which is the most important thing! Naked moonlight wrestling -brilliant!
Don't know where abouts in Ireland you are but if you're competant enough now in walk and trot, does your riding centre ever offer hacking? It's a great way to move on and if the horses are safe, to have your first canter. I'd start most people off with their first canter and jump out hacking as the horses here are really safe and know their job and using a steadier one the riders find it great as a canter on a straight forest track or a jump over a few logs is much easier than in the arena. They're not having to worry about turning or steering, just getting into a rhythm and can canter for longer so have more time to get used to it. The horses are also more forward outside and so it's not as much work for the rider to get them going or worry about correct legs or keeping them balanced, they can just go with it! Just an idea if you want to try something different, maybe see if it's an option in your centre. Also don't worry too much about the horses going better for you instructor - she's obviously a lot more experienced than you at this stage so the horses will know this and react accordingly.
Keep up the updates though - they're great

Hey I've been out and about once or twice - when the weahter's been ok for it - I think that the probs I'm having with the rise need to be fixed before I'd feel confident enough to try anything else...and, I love my lunging lessons and indoor barn still, as tiring as they are on my legs I did ask my RI to work me hard until I was fitter...famous last words..haha...I've done some catnering on the lunge...first time was a bit iffy...think I mentioned it in an earlier post, when I mistakenly urged the hrose into canter...the last time it was brilliant...I had a good seat...rocked back and forwards...so different from the trot...ah, it was amazing...now add to that,a bit more skill and a sunny day outside...hmm...that's what I'm waiting for...keeps me going despite the searing pain in my thighs and the ache in my calves...it's cool..I must earn the right..just reading your post does make me long for a forest run - i think the horse would love it too...we've an outdoor arena that's pretty big..it's just the weather's been so poor, you'd rather be indoors One thing I've noticed though and completely unexpected is that, in my battle for the rising trot...there's no more double bumping when I'm sitting it...how did that happen, in the background...the weirdest feeling...like this little belly dance going on...so, I'm happy with that...cos my first seated trot was more like "up - weeee - down - crunch - up - weeee - down - thump"...I'm getting glimpses now of how riding feels when, if even just for a moment, I get it right...the rising trot becomes nothing more than almost letting yourself be pushed up...balance is perfect, body relaxed...the seated trot actually becomes enjoyable and pleasant and stable..again the relaxed and trusting body...confident enough in the process to unclench and allow the horse's movement to lead...I have this feeling in my head though that something's about the click...keep at it - keep chipping away...back to the lunge line, build up more stamina and muscle...it's become a bit of a personal challenge now so, unfortuantely, I think I'm stubbornly invested in perfecting this rising trot business

 

[buzzles]

You're probably better off riding indoors with the weather we've been having - although was lovely out this morning so won't complain too much.
You will find the rising trot gets easier as you get fitter and your muscles start to get used to it- you shouldn't feel like you're having to make an effort to rise, the horses movement should nearly dictate when you rise and it sounds like you're starting to get a feel for that. It's all about staying relaxed and moving with the horse and as you become more confident and comfortable this will get easier.
You sound like you're not afraid of a bit of hardship as riding in an arena is for sure a lot harder both mentally and physically than out hacking- you don't have to work half as much outdoors, ok you still have to have your wits about you but you can also just relax and what you've learned in the arena will come more naturally to you - especially if you're on a nice safe horse
Look forward to your next update and I'm sure you'll soon perfect the rising trot

 

[IrishRegulus]

You're probably better off riding indoors with the weather we've been having - although was lovely out this morning so won't complain too much.
You will find the rising trot gets easier as you get fitter and your muscles start to get used to it- you shouldn't feel like you're having to make an effort to rise, the horses movement should nearly dictate when you rise and it sounds like you're starting to get a feel for that. It's all about staying relaxed and moving with the horse and as you become more confident and comfortable this will get easier.
You sound like you're not afraid of a bit of hardship as riding in an arena is for sure a lot harder both mentally and physically than out hacking- you don't have to work half as much outdoors, ok you still have to have your wits about you but you can also just relax and what you've learned in the arena will come more naturally to you - especially if you're on a nice safe horse
Look forward to your next update and I'm sure you'll soon perfect the rising trot

Well, that was a fun week. I feel like my legs have been pulled from my pelvic sockets, twisted, andreattached...my thighs are ruined - there'll be no dancing for awhile...lurvely welts and bruises. Ifeel quite proud..nothing like a rigorous week in the indoor arena to sort thewheat from the chaff..the look on the valentines day couple waiting to come in(she'd bought them both a starter lesson) was more than sufficient payment formy gruelling session...haha...as they beheld the broken apelike creature, far removedfrom any vestiges of humanity - bathed in sweaty pain, bearing a look of almostmasochistic delight in its eyes...

...for the rising trot had been defeated - far from perfect,but it was there. A lesson withoutstirrups did the trick! At the beginning I was not so enthusiastic aboutgetting rid of 'em, but within a couple of steps, I was already "sinkingin" to the saddle...and I could feel the horses sides so much more -itseemed like the most natural thing in the world to just curl those legs aroundhis big belly...no more flappy kicks...more like already being in someone'sembrace and giving another little hug - sorry if that sounds weird, but it'sthe best way I can describe it my heels were reaching for the floor...nodiscomfort 'you know where' for me either, despite not having thestirrups...for intervals, the saddle felt like a big deep armchair and not thecrazy box of frogs it had felt like not a month earlier

Rising without stirrups was a bit of a bother...more like,flinging-upward-pelvic-wobbly-hope-for-the-best, all the time trying to ignoreinner voicings of 'can thigh muscles rip?'

We trotted in and out of cones, he didn't veer off course -hey, he didn't even stop half as much as before...actually felt like he wasrather intuitive that day and that we were doing something together - andgetting it right - boy, was it sore for me but I hadn't depleted all my energywith poor rises like before, so I was able to work through it No pain, nogain, right?

For my reward I was allowed a canter...left hand reins,right hand pommel...ah, wonderful...after the trot, it feels so smooth...can'tdescribe it...and then, as I was sailing round the arena, something frightenedmy gentle steed...so he just bolted and went for it..charging onward and awayfrom the mighty evil flapping poster and all its hidden yellowy horrors..hewasn't sticking around ...the trouble was, for a moment, it looked like Iwasn't sticking around either, that good 'ol deep seat was now a crazed andangry box of frogs again..then a brief moment of inertia - a sideways shufflewould have unseated me surely..but luck was mine and old freakypants had begunto chill out...I found my seat once more and, with it, the deep and dourdiscomfort of a crunchy slapped gonad. Ah, the ungelded one had to dismount and go foetal for a bit.RI thoughtI'd been unnerved from the ride, but I assured her t'was but the gentleman'sburden - to prove it, I got back on and we started cantering for another fewlaps - memories of terror-inducing banners and startling blows to the gooliesconsigned to distant shore with a final roar of my horse's fear-dispellingflatus...all was well in the arena once more

I feel that I made some real progress this week...even thinking of treating myself to a new pair of breeches Believe it or not but my beginner ones are already showing wear and tear - I take that as a good sign. So glad I worked through the pain andfrustration...even beginning to feel a little fitter I also felt a real difference when i started treating this as a sport; therefore, preparing in advance of a session with a balanced meal, carbs...and a LOT of water beforehand..a lot... I've come away from some lessons drenched in sweat - seems to help...so glad I''ve cleared this corner with a "nice seat" according to the RI and "quite a nice rise"...hey, that's good enough for me! as long as the foundations are solid, I'm happy to go the longhaul and slowly improve...thanks for all theencouragement and sage advice. appreciate it

 

[TrasaM]

What a great update you are describing the learning process so well and it sounds like you've got a good instructor.
I had the same reaction to my first no stirrups effort .. Er..are you sure? I soon learnt that the only alternative to bouncing off was relaxing the hips. My RI actually managed to spook the horse I was riding on a no stirrups session. We were walking quietly when she picked a stone off the ground and chucked it out of the school. Instead she hit the metal gate hinge just behind the horse who of course jumped out of his skin and took off! Lucky for me he was very lazy and pulled up quickly. All good practice for real life I love my lessons without stirrups now although at the start it was really uncomfortable having all those muscles and tendons being stretched in new and painful ways.
Just so you know it's not just beginners who struggle with lessons I went to a new place in Cyprus yesterday. Horse, a TB, was warmed up and waiting for me. Got in and all ok..seemed like a nice boy. Then tried to trot and got a halt with ears back and humping back..the typical..if you keep on I'm going to buck.. I will grrrrhh.. It kept happening so RI got a lunge line out and got him moving forward with the help of a schooling whip. Once he was going forward line was removed and he trotted ok..alternating sitting and rising not a welcome exercise as I'd not ridden for over a week. So decided to try a canter. ..yes well! Horse very unhappy and felt very unbalanced .. Tried on right rein and whopeeee..take off with added broncs for good measure. I got my butt off the saddle and was examining my options for a less hard landing place because I though he was going to unseat me as we flew down the school, which was long enough for him to gain momentum. Anyhow turned ok and stayed in saddle and then pulled him up. Enough is enough. Horse did not wish to be ridden and why not. Owner/ RI said he's not accustomed to different riders ..it would seem he is therefore in the wrong job. I've never had a horse respond to me like that before but I'm pretty sure that all was not right with his right shoulder.
So y'see. All smoothly does not go, even after 2.5 years of lessons and regularly riding friends' horses of all shapes and sizes and temperaments. I will persist..but I'm running out of schools to try.

 

[buzzles]

Love your updates IrishRegulus - look forward to the next one

 

[Skib]

Very interesting thread. It is indeed difficult to find good lessons for an adult beginner - you need a skilled teacher and a suitable horse and a lesson space.
My OH (male) rides in his normal jocket Y fronts. His first pair of breeches were quite cheap with seams on the inner thigh, and he did get rubbed sore one day when riding a wide backed cob. So if you are going to continue with riding, it is worth buying breeches of a good brand that have a soft seam or no seam at all. Or OH rides sometimes on holiday in Wrangler USA jeans which dont seem to rub. But you do need to buy them longer in the leg if you are going to ride in them.
Lunge lessons are excellent for getting your balance on a horse and learning the rise so you dont rub yourself on the saddle. But it seems that when men learn to ride, they tend to go fast forward very early on, just as you report and the shock and bounce and speed sometimes puts them off riding. Best to be carefully and slowly taught. My OH was much much older than you. He was taught to sit walk trot and canter on the lunge in classical style. It was almost a year before he "got" rising trot. So you have plenty of time. If you get used to riding with your weight back on your seat bones and when it comes to rising trot, roll your hips forward between your hands and then sit gently back on your seat bones, rather than landing on your crotch, it should be more comfortable.
One reason OH didnt learn rising trot for so long was that he hacked Western. I know that some Western men riders going on hunting trips in the States wear women's tights under their jeans to stop the rubbing. My OH was advised to do this but never needed to, as he doesnt spend hours in the saddle.
One man's solution may not be right for another, but I hope this is some help.

 

[IrishRegulus]

Very interesting thread. It is indeed difficult to find good lessons for an adult beginner - you need a skilled teacher and a suitable horse and a lesson space.
My OH (male) rides in his normal jocket Y fronts. His first pair of breeches were quite cheap with seams on the inner thigh, and he did get rubbed sore one day when riding a wide backed cob. So if you are going to continue with riding, it is worth buying breeches of a good brand that have a soft seam or no seam at all. Or OH rides sometimes on holiday in Wrangler USA jeans which dont seem to rub. But you do need to buy them longer in the leg if you are going to ride in them.
Lunge lessons are excellent for getting your balance on a horse and learning the rise so you dont rub yourself on the saddle. But it seems that when men learn to ride, they tend to go fast forward very early on, just as you report and the shock and bounce and speed sometimes puts them off riding. Best to be carefully and slowly taught. My OH was much much older than you. He was taught to sit walk trot and canter on the lunge in classical style. It was almost a year before he "got" rising trot. So you have plenty of time. If you get used to riding with your weight back on your seat bones and when it comes to rising trot, roll your hips forward between your hands and then sit gently back on your seat bones, rather than landing on your crotch, it should be more comfortable.
One reason OH didnt learn rising trot for so long was that he hacked Western. I know that some Western men riders going on hunting trips in the States wear women's tights under their jeans to stop the rubbing. My OH was advised to do this but never needed to, as he doesnt spend hours in the saddle.
One man's solution may not be right for another, but I hope this is some help.

Hello there Skib!

ah, the undie-thing...it's honestly not a bother now that I have a decent seat. I use a 'gonad slap' as a not-so-gentle reminder of bad seating position, heels up, slouching forward, hunching, etc. when I'm in good form, I honestly wouldn't notice the 'ol family allowance

Thanks for replying though and, since my beginnings, I can now rise with the best of 'em...sit for two when I chagne the reins...for me, stretches beforehand really made a BIG difference. I'm not taking about five/ten minutues but a good half hour. One of my favourites is stting on the floor, cross-legged and then slowly nudge and stretch the knees down to the floor. I've found that men are naturally "stiffer" around the hips anyway...so more stretching is needed. I've other stretching methods but some are a bit iffy - each to their own.

I can sit the trot no problem now...it's all relax the hips. At the moment I'm practising the two point position, which is amazing now my legs are strong enough to do the support/shock absorby action...feels like I push down with his front legs and, weirdly, this pushing down motion gives me greater stability...well, that's how it felt...been having a lot more of those moments...when things all click into place and it just feels right...like your body is working in harmony with the beast (ok, bit cheesey sounding, that, but you know what I mean) when you get it right, it's bl** dy amazing...))

So, now I can walk, walk on a long lead, sit the trot and rise (on correct diagonal -don;y need to be told anymore), sit the canter. I can also do all of those gaits now in two-point position...weirdly, walking seems to be the hardest gait to maintain the two point. OH, I can also jump too...40cms...RI had a right laugh at my botty sticking out yesterday...In my defence, when responding to her initial 'stop hunching forward, I sought clarity by asking: So, Ought I stick out my backside like a young male fop? ( I'd use another word normally here but it might not be proper form on this site) SHe said yes and then had a right giggle when I did just that...It's OK now though..we worked through that one and now I know to not swivel my backside up in a rather rude and inviting position; but, simply to keep one's back straight

At the moment I'm working on my landing position after the jumping, it's getting better and better every day. I have more faith in the things which just" come with time" and am less perfectionist (not much, but less)

So, re. age...I think it just takes a little longer to develop the muscles and puff if you're a little older (although if, unlikeme, you are already fit, then no probs) It took me a couple of months before I could do endless circuits of rising trot...saying that, I did a lot of stretches and exercises that first month...even wiggly-jiggly the whole lot in the morning in the dining round with the stereo up high...and curtains closed

Re. the rubbing....was, in fact, more like crunching down on one's bits and bobs...not chaffing, as such. My problem had been in that regard...all that rising and things come down..it's gravity..plus, I've now learned that swivelling my pelvis back a little so I'm more seating on the "boney bits" of my bum, provides not only the correct seat, but keeps one's tackle up and out of the way. Sorry about this conversation, but we're all big boys and girls here and, hopefully, most of us have a significant other and are well aware of the differences in our respective anatomies.

Regarding the breeches, there's a place near me..probably against forum rules to mention it, but they make their own breeches upstairs..only bout 40 quid and, boy, are they really good! tight in the right places and loose in the right places..I went there to fork out on some Rodrigo Pessoa boys, tried 'em on and they were totally cr* p...for about £140, I expected a lot more...seems like breeches are like jeans...sometimes you'll find a dream pair for very little..but the price tag is never a guarantee of quality..maybe the size of the designer's ego.

From what I learned by the cut of his breeches (tight at the front and loose at the back) old Rodrgio Pessoa has a backside the size of a cob and a front which must be gelded...as I would defy any man to fit into what Rodrigo believes is sufficient space for you-know-what...

Woman's tights?! NOt the image I would have associated with the MArlboro Man...in his wife's tights..haha...or his daughter's...yuck! I knew of bikers that used to do that, but they claimed it kept their little white stick legs warm. I don't get the whole jeans thing anyway...for me, there's no contest between jeans and good breeches, the latter having been designed for the English saddle. Some men think breeches look girly or whatever..I normally tell them to find another hobby it that worries them so much. Besides, the ladies at my barn, think my breeches look rather fetching and tell me all the time ...nice generous pleats on the waist so that the top is just like a regular pair of trousers and doesn't go tight until it meets the top of the thigh...of course, I can understand why some men with skinny legs might feel more comfortable in jeans as they do look a bit sticklike in breeches. For me breeches and good knee height boots is what served countless folks in the past, so why change a winning formula.

Would love to try western esp barrel racing - that looks like great fun! but, an apprentice cannot have two masters; so, until I've learned the English saddle, I'll stay away from the western stock boyos...lookinh forward to trying them at some point though

Happy riding ))

 

[TrasaM]

Hiya. It sounds like you've made loads of progress- and you're jumping too ..well done. Learning to jump was on my must achieve list and I've found it quite easy compared with some of the other things I've had to learn. My RI seldom makes me do it anymore as I enjoy the flat work more. There might just be an ickle part of me that'd love to go on a good gallop around a X country course and I have done a mini X country test and loved it. Great update

 

[buzzles]

Love reading your updates, sounds like you're making fantastic progress and fair play for sticking it out to get fit enough and put the work in to get that amazing feeling of when it all comes together
Now you've got the buzz of jumping there'll be no stopping you, galloping and xc next !! If you're ever in down in Wicklow (Better not say where on here in case I get in trouble for advertising!) give us a shout and you can come out for a xc rideout - there's nothing like it Though don't know how your instructor keeps a straight face teaching you, I'd say your great craic

 

[tallyho!]

Oh for goodness sakes... you back again? How's yer little nephews?

 

[IrishRegulus]

Oh for goodness sakes... you back again? How's yer little nephews?

Hello This is MY thread! Go get your own... just kidding, but couldn't resist...My nephew's doing well...wants to join the US Marines, but we all think he'll have to lose a few pounds first...The nieces are doing well too, thanks for asking...Two of them are getting pony lessons already and I've already spoilt 'em both in shopping sprees to equestrain accessory heaven...One's over your way in Cambridge and the other's down in Cork...Wish I could get my big sissy "marine wannabe" neph into riding; but, alas, I fear he may not have the physical fitness to even swing into the saddle

 

[IrishRegulus]

Love reading your updates, sounds like you're making fantastic progress and fair play for sticking it out to get fit enough and put the work in to get that amazing feeling of when it all comes together
Now you've got the buzz of jumping there'll be no stopping you, galloping and xc next !! If you're ever in down in Wicklow (Better not say where on here in case I get in trouble for advertising!) give us a shout and you can come out for a xc rideout - there's nothing like it Though don't know how your instructor keeps a straight face teaching you, I'd say your great craic

Oh yes, please! XC with the Wexford pros...sounds dreadfully dangerous...OK, I'm in! Gimme another three months and I might just be good enough to keep up with the girls

Can I announce something to the forum, most of whom I'd imagine are female...I have never had more respect for women since I started riding...As a man (with a bit of competitiveness..don't we all?) I have enjoyed a strikingly new sensation...

Being out-performed, regularly, by women.

Finding myself saying: Awh, I wish I were as good as her.

For a man to have female role models is actually quite inspirational.

OK, moment over

HEy, I had my first fall )) hahah...although, my RI told me that, technically it wasn't a fall cos this cat landed on his nibble little manpaws. OK, I'm right handed so tend to lean more to the right...this is a consistent mistake I make...but that's ok as consistent mistakes are easier to spot and, therefore, anticipate and rectify.

So, I tried 60cms...did one...got the landing and forward on into trot...second time...I lost my left foot and felt my body weight slipping over to the right...Being a ex(ish) biker, I felt I had taken something from all those high speed crashes; namely, that little slowdown in the brain when you *know* you're coming off...the OMGs stop, there's no need...everything in you body knows you're falling and that every other part of the body has been notified and reported back...leaving you to think about "what can I do for damage control?"

Well, I thought: If I go over the right side here and don't get my foot out of the stirrup, there'll be tears and gnashing of teeth...So, I flung my leg backwards, up and over the saddle...doing a neat little 360 degree turn - the anti-clockwise motion out the saddle allowed me to remove my right foot from the stirrup, finish the spin and land on my feet facing my RI ! haha..I swear, even my horse was a bit surprised..of course, he tried to hide it behind that big, silent, equiny head of his..but I think he was both impressed and disappointed - the disappointment coming from his not seeing me on my back, and his being robbed of an opportunity for a good old horse gloat at my cruppled figure on the ground, no doubt combined with a hearty: Oh, for God's sake, do keep up you silly little apeman...

FYI, my instructor only keels over at some of my verbal explosions. I think I endeared myself to her on my first day when my gentle stead let rip, for want of a better term. My complaints of "having a nose full of horsef**t" being a riding aid in itself..(as in I discovered newfound strength and motivation to get the heck outta there quick) combined with the startled expressions from some well-heeled ladyfolk had her doubled over.

Thanks for the reply. Have to dash down to my lesson!

 

[IrishRegulus]

I'm going to see my first horse today...to buy SO, here goes...any tips? as I have to go alone *but* I'm leaving the wallet behind, even deposits. I can always return and if someone else rushes in before me all stressed to get the perfect horse, then their need was clearly greater than mine..so they can have it...and a minor coronary before they hit 50.

I find myself in an all too familiar place regarding horse buying...reminded me of trying to arrange lifts from friends when I was a youngster "sans voiture"..Sure, public displays of generousity abound...everyone who has a car offers loudly to assist, but try pinning them down over it and there's usually a lack lustre response...same seems to apply to horse buying...even my RI was: I don't want you to buy until I've ridden it...which was fantastic, but physically arranging it...so, thank god my mother taught me the value of self-reliance..I';ve had to turn down three viewings of potentially good animals because it's hard enough finding a time between you and seller, never mind trying to fit in an already over-worked RI too (and we know what funny hours they work)

So I'm off out to see a novicey-ride type gelding. I guess no one a better judge than I when it come to how the animal feels...I mean, my RI chose a different animal for me to ride (see above -ref doughnuts) and I hated it...almost put me off riding...so, what does that say about how it feels to me v. how it looks to another? No one can share that saddle...I think, after my paltry four months, I have a slight inkling for what feels good for me...so, with that said, I don't think it would hurt for me to help expedite matters by having a ride and then go back to RI and report my findings...maybe that'll pique someone's interest more...than loads of hypothetical viewings.

Which brings me to my second dilemma.

Lately I seem to be losing my left stirrup a lot...by losing I mean losing the ball of foot on stirrup..and ending up with the stirrup at my heel...this only happens on my left...so....

I am right handed so am I naturally displacing my body weight more on my right?

It's a real problem as it's totally affecting my balance...as I constantly try to compensate..or get that stirrup under the ball of my foot..I feel like my centre of grav is shifting all over the place...unfortunately that makes me grab with my knees/thighs and the whole process unravels..usually, for me, just before a transition change or a jump...my RI says I'm thinking about it too much and to let "things happen in their own time" which, whilst encouraging, does little to help me address what I'd consider foundation skills...I know from experience of learning other things how difficult it can be to reverse bad habits, once established...and, tbh, I did not elect for endless arena sessions English riding to "learn as I go along" Sometimes it seems more unnatural and even harder to learn the "correct way" of something ebcause it often requires that said technique/skill in order to recognise its importance..Besides, if I wanted to pick it up as I went along, I wouldn't bother forking out for all these privates. Now I'm thinking that maybe the RI is hinting that, at this stage, I'd benefit more from practice, practice, practice...ergo, why I'm going to buy. Probably be a lot cheaper at the mo than throwing 300 odd quid at lesson every month. #

I just have the feeling that, were I to spend a good day or two by myself in the arena or hacking, it might allow me to explore my own body movements without someone shouting at me to fix my mistakes, or bark "horse tongue" at me..for effs sakes..I mean, it was weeks before I understood that "leg-on" doesn't actually mean leg on; but, rather, leg squeeze and stop...there was me, killing myself and all hope of my horse recognising my "subtle" leg aids in future....by squeezing and *continuing to hold the squeeze* haha. Sometimes, just being in the lesson makes me tense up, or worse, begin to get agitated. Someone tells you it's wrong yet seemingly offers no tangible way to fix said error save "you have to relax and it will come to you"...hmm... "then stop howling at me to fix it then" me thinks...

I wonder have i reached a horrible point where the difference between my learning needs and the teaching styles is beginning to widen...as my feeble skills increase, I suppose, so does the method...I can almost think for myself now...Now I don't like other people fiddling with my stirrup lengths...*I'll do that think ya"...sure, I'm probably doing it wrong or find I need to make lots of adjustments...but could that be a sign of my brain wanting to take its first horsey baby steps...Humans, all of us, truly learn from our mistakes...remember the driving isntructor who said that you don' really start learning until you pass your test? Have I reached the end of the usefulness of my three private weekly lessons, d/ya think? Am I wasting money which could be used for livery fees instead? MAybe I should drop to one private a week and fill in the rest with solid practice, increase my fitness, strengthen my riding muscles and start doing the fun stuff, such as beginning from scratch with a new horse-friend...building bonds, learning about equine "field culture", being able to say "my horse" hehehe.

I thought group lessons might help take the pressure off and, in many ways they would be perfect, until I met my class mates...teenies, every one...charming little ladies, don't get me wrong - well mannered, friendly and not-at-all b**hey...but I probably get a free pass on that cos I'm the same age as their daddies...it was really good fun, in a nuts way, at the start..there were about 12 of us..never been with so mnay riders before...all bumper to bumper going round and round...but, I would rather have adult riding buddies...but, the teenies seems to be the only level I'm capable of...and there were little ladies there who were much more graceful than my manly frame...i feel like a llama in a field of sheep...I get it - most folks seem to being at that age...so, until I improve, that's my lot for group lessons...no worries though, as I explained to one of the girls when we were taking the horses back to the field...one good thing about starting horseriding in ones 30s in that, at least, you have the means to throw bags of money at it, within reason...but, since the departure of my not-so-thrifty other half, I feel like I have a second income )

One lovely moment, whilst taking the "schoolies" back to pasture was a brief snapshot of the life of the blue collar horse there we all were, our own little sweaty and tired herd...threading our way up the lanes towards the fields, past the "Horse Ritz" (full livery), with its clean and tidy stalls and posh nags peering out nonchalantly at the "tradeshorses" walking past with their big hairy, muddy hooves...ah, I felt a momentary rush of true appreciation for the "schoolie", a monument to every human's first steps into equestrianism and, without which, none of us would ever gravitate to our own private equine. So, three cheers for the Schoolies, the unsung heroines and heros of the working livery

 

[Leitrim]

Have you bought a horse yet?
Your posts about learning to ride were brilliant. I laughed every time I read them.
Be great to hear your account of horse ownership.