Numpty Quote of the day!

Kat

Kat

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My mum seriously embarrssed me the other day. She isn't horsey but has two daughters who have been horse mad since before they started school. You'd think that after nearly thirty years of being subjected to horses she might have absorbed a bit of information but no, to add to the long list of daft things she's said like "so this bay mare, is it a girl or a boy?" or "17hh is that big?" and "why is that horse wearing an anorak?" is this cracker:


She's chatting to one of her friend's daughter's who has recently bought a horse and is keen to show it off, and interested in my search for a new horse:

Friend's Daughter: Here's a picture of my new horse

My mum: Oh she looks pretty, what colour is she? [the fact that having seen a picture she still had to ask should have rung some alarm bells really]

FD: She's fleabitten

Mum: Oh that isn't very nice! Has she got fleas then?

FD: No it is just the way she looks

Mum: Oh is she a bit old then?

FD: No fleabitten grey, that is what they call them when they are white with brown flecks..................... she's not actually been eaten by fleas.

Poor girl only wanted to show off her new horse!
 
Fabulous!!!!!! Glad its not just me that says daft things!!!!! In her defence, as you say, she's not all that horsey. I,on the other hand, have no defence lol!!!!!
 
Haha, A friend of mine's mum, who has been around horses for the last 15 years was at a show with us, we were all sitting round beer tent. To make polite conversation to the lady opposite at our table she said... ' so are you horsey then ' ...It was Pippa Funnell HAHAHA
She will never live that down!
xx
 
EgerdenFarmStud said:
Haha, A friend of mine's mum, who has been around horses for the last 15 years was at a show with us, we were all sitting round beer tent. To make polite conversation to the lady opposite at our table she said... ' so are you horsey then ' ...It was Pippa Funnell HAHAHA
She will never live that down!
xx
Click to expand...

I can sympathise with that, I was at the gym (part of a hotel) several years ago when this bloke walked through the pool area wearing his trainers (one of my pet hates) as he got closer I spotted that he was sporting a mohiccan hair cut exactly the same as the one that David Beckham was sporting in that morning's papers. So as he walked past I said loudly to my mum, "Oh look at that pillock who has copied David Beckham's haircut, how sad..."

You guessed it.... it was actually David Beckham and he was staying at the hotel in advance of an England match - ooops :o :o :o

Luckily my mum wasn't embarrassed because she didn't recognise him either.
 
My mum is terrbile!

I have a shetland Rocky and my old mare Rosie was a 16.1 ID x TB - one day she asked me (knowing Rocky was gelded) if they could have a baby together!!

One day she was washing Rosies numnah and asked if I needed Rockys jacket back soon so she knew when to wash it!!

She came up to see my new filly Emma and asked why her feet where bald, if a 2 year old could sit on her etc etc etc!!

Lol :)
 
haha, my boyfriend said a bit of a cracker the other day to, we walked past the school where someone was practising their DR test.
BF turns to me and say "woooh, if I have a horse I'm gunna make it drift round corners like them!"
They were doing half pass!
 
lol, mothers eh :D

My OH was telling his mum (not sure how we got onto the subject) but came out with (in a very serious tone might I add) that

''horses should not lye down for too long because they will get a twisted gut''

hmmmm, I think he got a little mixed up there bless but I didnt dare correct him because...well it just sounded really sweet of him to think he knew exactly what he was talking about.

I did nearly spit my tea out though :D
 
One of my old boyfriends at a ODE helping out with the tack change comes out with "Do you need to change that thing under the saddle? The, urm, numpty?" :)

We now have no numnah's in our family, they are now called numpties :)
 
Katikins said:
One of my old boyfriends at a ODE helping out with the tack change comes out with "Do you need to change that thing under the saddle? The, urm, numpty?" :)

We now have no numnah's in our family, they are now called numpties :)
Click to expand...

ROFLMAO

*and lots of extra bits because it won't let me type a short message*
 
I think my boyfriend possibly beats all these comments!

I will set the scene, we were driving to the supermarket, throught the outskirts of Chingford (London) and he saw a lady on her horse on a green, the horse had its head down grazing...

"Do horses eat grass?"

:eek: "I am sorry what did you say..."

"Do horses eat grass, I thought they ate hay."

"Are you actually serious? What is hay?"

"I don't know, hay."

"No, hay is grass, dried grass. What do you think wild or feral horses eat?"

"oh ok"

Bless him, to be fair to him he was brought up in London.

We now live in Surrey and he adores horses, is desperate to ride and wants to play polo (typical boy, small steps). He is now actually unbelievably helpful and has moved on so much from the first night he did night checks with me and I aksed him to fill up the horses water. Herbie sensing inexperience gently tried to push past him out of the door and all I heard was...

"Help...he is trying to escape...help...he is trying to run me over" (bf has his arms spread wide and knee in Herbies chest in the open doorway)

"Close the door then!"
 
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