Oh well, things happen for a reason... don't they?....

RuthnMeg

RuthnMeg

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My daughter who is 6 1/2 has a pony on loan. Due to unforseen circumstances this is her 3rd pony she has had on loan.
The pony we had last year was a true saint, and only due to the owners we had to give her back. It was totally gutting.
So, very quickly (maybe too quickly) I found another nice pony whose owner was happy for us to loan her. She is a 22 year old welshie, who has done all PC before. This is lovely to know, but pony is NOT a saint (not bad either mind), and the fact that this one is more jiggly, more nervous and doesn't like being on her own has been a minor problem! My daughter has been coping very well considering, but at the same time getting less and less keen to ride. And then last week got bucked off. It was just one of those things that happens, no-ones fault really. Since then my daughter has changed. She is now scared of the pony, even to the point of telling me when 'Candy' moves her head! It never occoured to her before. She has asked me very sweetly that she doesn't want to do it at the moment, and might take it up when she is 10 if she is allowed!! (Bless her).
So, on that note I have contacted the ponies owner via email telling her the story. I have give notice of termination of the loan agreement, as we simply can't keep the pony with this going on.
Have I done the right thing? I don't want to push my daughter to doing something she doesn't want to do? I hope the owners can understand, I don't want to be a bad loanee!!
I have also told the PC , as we had only just re-joined!! Oh dear, I think Iam in a pickle with all of this!!!

Ginger Beer anyone??
 
You have done absolutely the right thing !! If your daughter is nervous, it'll start that old vicious cycle going between her and the pony, and could put her off altogether. If the pony isn't the right one, then it's far better for it to be returned, even into retirement, than to run rings round your daughter.

Hope that helps, sm x
 
Agree with the above. If they are not getting on,there is nothing to be done. There is no point terrifying your daughter and the pony needs to be in a home where his rider is happy and confident with him.
 
Thankyou Shysmum. Deep down I know its the right thing to do, but on the surface you ''think'' you can solve the problem. Iam not one for giving up normally so would therefore try harder to make it better. This time, I have waved the white flag and thats actually one of the first times I have done.
I just hope that Candy's owner can understand!! Its not the pony's fault, it really is one of those things. Oh, I feel bad and yet relieved all at the same time!!
 
It's totally natural to feel bad about "giving up", but in fact, you are just admitting the pony is not the right one - that takes guts ! Sometimes I guess you just have to go with your gut instinct, and at the end of the day, your daughter is the one that matters. I am sure the pony's owner will understand totally.

The right pony will come along, and this blip will be forgotten. Good luck with the owner, let us know how it goes. sm x
 
Definitely think you are doing the right thing for your daughter. She wants to enjoy it and not be frightened. Maybe in a year or two she may feel like riding again.
 
My daughter who is 6 1/2 has a pony on loan. Due to unforseen circumstances this is her 3rd pony she has had on loan.
The pony we had last year was a true saint, and only due to the owners we had to give her back. It was totally gutting.
This I'm afraid is what happens when you loan, the pony belongs to the owners and they can take it back at any time.
Of course you have done the right thing in sending the current pony back. There is nothing worse than a parent forcing a nervous child to ride, when she really doesn't want to.
 
Aw hun, been there. Yes, you are doing the right thing. Unless there is a deep bond there is no point in continuing.

D2 had Little Lad. He dumped her just once too often, and that was after the previous bout where we had got her back on again and trusting him again. Still have LL, but D2 has given up. I wish I had done things differently in our case, but D2 has given up. It's a pity as she has the best natural hands and seat out of the three of us. Ho hum. She still gets involved with the horses, just doesn't ride them.
 
The only thing i would have done differently is to make contact either by phone or in person. I hate getting the "bad news" either by text, or e-mail.

hope everything works out fine for you
 
Gingerwitch said:
The only thing i would have done differently is to make contact either by phone or in person. I hate getting the "bad news" either by text, or e-mail.

hope everything works out fine for you
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Yes, I do too, and I agree, it I should have done this BUT Iam a very emotional person and I would 100% break down and not get my words straight! An email is the easiest way for me, no one wants to listen to a blabbering mess!!
I must learn to control it, but Iam just not strong enough. Ho hum.
 
Soo done the right thing, It never works to push a child, she will go back to it if she wants. Slightly different but my son was playing cricket and football at a young age, then at about the age of 7 decided he no longer wanted to do it (much to my husbands disgust!!) but we let him make his own decisions....he went on to try kung fu (got to blue belt then gave up) riding ("stupid smelly thing won't go where I want it to") then when he was 10 decided football and cricket were back on the agenda....he is now captain of his football team and has just been selected to play cricket for the district (north Essex) under 11's and is tipped to do really well in this. My point is let them make their own choices and they will make the one that's right for them!! Don't beat yourself up over it you are doing whats baes tfor your little girl!! :)
 
Well, it turns out the owner doesn't mind and completely understands which is a relief. The only thing is its all happening a bit quick as Candy is getting picked up tonight to go back home. Sad as it is, I feel happy about it and quite relieved.
On another note, the PC say they can't refund me some of the membership money as its all gone of to HQ. I wasn't expecting it ALL back but seeing as my daughter isn't keen to do 'events' at the mo, it does seem a bit OTT. They say she is insured and can take part in un-mounted activities. True, I suppose, just wasn't quite what I was hoping for! They also say they will look out for a pony for her.... I think I will have to decline their offer politely.
Onwards and upwards..... booked in for swimming on Thursday, so that should take her mind off everything!! lol
 
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