OMG someone please tell me what to do...

McNally

McNally

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I rehomed my horse last spring. I loved him so so much but truthfully didnt have the confidence required-He's been at a professional reschooling yard and they have confirmed he's a difficult sharp horse. I had him 3/4 years and during that time he terrified me and made me the happiest ever but ultimately i rode him quietly but kepy within our "happy boundaries" which meant i plodded on roads etc often hanging on for dear life. When my young daughter got a youngster i decided i couldnt cope anymore and rehomed him. (no longer just me to be injured but my 10 yr old riding a 4yr old who was slightly more unpredictable than her previous 20 yr old who i knew would look after her)
I now have the horse i want, i can do anything with. He had problems (he's vicious!) but im getting places with him, Ive got to the point i can handle/groom etc without being attacked (no one else can- he lunges with teeth and spins to double barrel) He actually is cuddly at times! Ridden wise i can finally go where i want when i want without having to think what i may pass etc etc....
All good until the call horse 1's home has fallen thru and he's homeless. Of course i had him back temporarily until i can loan him out- Problem is I love him so much!!!
I'm wet and sappy i know but he's been back a week and i am crying daily at the thought of getting rid of him- Its breaking my heart.
Realistically i know i dont want to go back to the feeling of elation every time i make it home in one piece or having to depend on someone to ride with but i'm seriously struggling right now with who to keep. (keeping both is NOT possibe, I can only keep them both for a maximum of 2/3 months)
 
I would think of all the reasons you let go of horse 1. Unless these have changed you will only be back there in the long run perhaps at the expense of a horse you can enjoy.
 
Do the right thing for horse 1 and find him a home with someone who can give him what he needs :) i'm sure he'll thank you for it!! And think how happy you'll be when you see him doing well in his new home xxxx
 
It sounds as if deep down you know that horse 1 would be better off with someone who has more time/experience to work through his issues...it's always hard to let go but its probably in both your best interests :)

You could also try loaning him out with the possibility to buy later, that way you can still visit and be content that he's happy...

Good luck with whatever you decide! :)
 
Thank you, I am going to ask my boss to ride both for me and give her opinion aswell. Yes i suppose in my head i do know but in my heart its different! I managed the first time as he was being a real sh**!
I have done a few ad's for a loan home- the other thing is i know horse 2 would be easier to rehome than 1.
As for selling thats a no, I dont want money for him and its worth far more to me to get the odd email or phone call to say he's happy and doing ok- if i sell i may completely loose touch. I'd be ok to gift him to the perfect person if a loan went well but with a clause that he's not to be sold on.

When i said i'd have him back i had no idea it would be so so hard! :-(
 
Putting up the loan ads doesn't commit you to anything. If the right person comes along you will know - and if they don't then it makes the decision for you.

But, if you don't even put the ads up/ask around then it is unlikely that the right person will come along?
 
Yea I know- I kinda feel bad advertising even like i'm being disloyal! I'm worried about all the bad loan threads you hear. No one in "real life" is on my side they cant see why i dont just stick up an advert stating his good points and make some money, Its not important to me (although i must admit i'm skint lol!)
Im also worried about having to say no to people who i dont think are suitable! How on earth?
 
I'd sell him to a really good home. Loan horses, especially challenging ones, often get passed from home to home, and it sounds like he really needs a good home where he could settle.. People tend to try harder and not give up with a bought horse, when they just send a loan horse back.. I've done it myself with my son's ponies, and had it done to ponies that I have loaned out. I'd never loan again.
 
Do you think? Even if i state that he can be gifted or permanent loaned if things go well after a trial period? This makes things worse. I cant sell- like i say i cant bear the thought of loosing touch completely but am perfectly willing to state in a contract that i wont just take him back unless the loaner/owners circumstances change and they become unable to keep him?
 
Could you get a sharer for both, saving half the costs?

Ultimately, yes you love him, but you have to think about what you're both getting from that relationship. Whats best for the both of you?

As for it being hard to find a loaner, you'll be suprised at what people will take when they don't have the commitment of buying a horse. I think when you loan you accept there may be things wrong.

Best of luck. I can appreciate its a really hard decision. I defiantely know that feeling of elation when you get back home safe, but wonder if it was pure luck!
 
Hey, I cant no that would otherwise be perfect but i rent a field and we signed a contract stating the number of horses to be kept there. Also there are only 3 stables and altho he's ok to live out the field is very wet clay so i have no choice but to bring them in when its bad. Im currently renting a little paddock across the road for my old horse but its only a short term rent as the owner needs it back come spring.
I do wonder is a lot of the problems we had originally were to do with livery yard rules ie certain horses had to be in by certain times and very restricted turn out etc. I now do as i please (as long as i look after the field to a reasonable standard!)
so really one does have to go :-(
 
It sounds like horse 1 needs a more experienced / confident rider to reach it's full potential and be happy and ultimately you two together (riding not handling) are not a perfect match.
As hard as it is, advertise him for loan and see who comes to see him? Be honest but not too negative and hopefully someone will fall in love with him like you have! I've had my mare for 4 years and love her to bits.. i could never ever ever sell her but loan homes can be more suitable for the horse aswell as you. It's heartbreaking but when you loan out your horse they are still yours, they just have a better matched rider :)
 
Your right i know! The other thing i have to take into account is that the hacking by my new yard involves a very busy tourist village and whilst he's very good in traffic sometimes i have to squeeze thru ridiculous standing still traffic and people- not to mention all the stopping for photographs we have to do! The thought of him having a hot head moment in the middle of all that would be horrendous!
 
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