Please ditch the trainer who makes you feel "dispirited", honestly, really good trainers don't try to change too much at a time, they have the ability to "see" the one thing that will make a difference and focus on that. They can also weigh up the rider and appreciate what can be changed and what has to be worked around. FWIW I find it so much easier to sit well on a horse that is going well ie soft in the back, on the aids, supple in the neck and straight but put me on a horse that is tight or behind the leg and I bounce around with my hands, tip forward and generally look a bit of a mess. I also loathe the pronouncements of some illustrious riders as few pretty competent riders would measure up to their expectations of what makes a "good" rider, sometimes there's a huge difference between an effective rider and one that looks pretty. I had some lessons with someone who did "centred riding", Sally Swift etc and she went to training with Charles De Kunfy. Her mantra was if you sit ride the horse goes well. I had a tricky lazy git, who I struggled with and after every session I felt so fed up because she made me feel it was my fault htat he didn't go well. I asked her to sit on him, she kept forgetting her hat but eventually I got her aboard and much to my amazement, she couldn't get him to canter and she even struggled to keep him going in trot. That was my last lesson with her. Find a new trainer. xx