Owners who spend too much time on HHO

H

Hovis_and_SidsMum

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22 January 2007
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Morning, its hovis here!
I am sending out a rallying cry to all horses whose owners come onto this hotbed of lies and corruption! Lets ban HHO!
Our owners come on here and come away with all manner of fun spoiling, image ruining, dastardly ideas and it has to STOP!

How many of you have discovered a way to prevent these pesky humans from riding you / grooming you/ loading you only to have your cunning plan foiled when some "helpful" human on here tells them how to stop it?
How many of you have trashed last years hideous rug thing only to have them produce another in some girly colour that so and so from HHO has got.

Last night was the final straw for me. My mother wants to baste me like some sort of turkey! Apparently she has discovered on here some half baked theory on how to look after my manly feathers and tonight is hell bent on covering me in more grease than a cross channel swimmer. Do I look like a goose?!!!
Where is the fun in getting my legs covered in mud if it will "just slide off overnight" (this was her speech last night).

Well I've had enough! Its time to take a stand. Say no to the fun spoiling, the bitting advice thats stops us scaring our owners to death, the loading advice which means we have to go out when we don't want to, the feeding advice that puts us on stupid diets, the handling advice that stops us getting our own way and to the pictures of girly pink rugs which they then dress us men in.

Its time for change! Say NO to HHO!
Who's with me?!!
 
Hovis, show me the petition - I'll give you a hoof print on it!! I too am having my dastardly plans dashed and am dressed head to toe in purple. They even expect me to carry myself! what do they think their hands are for????

The latest whisper is they are going to take me to dressage as others are trying it...I say no jumpeeee no workeeee!!
 
Hi,Amber here, me and my friends would like to sign your pettition, for one thing the time the owned spends on here would be far better spent looking after the animals in the owneds life. More pampering for Amber and friends, less on the stupid computer I say
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Hi, Canto here! My evil mother has sent me away to a really strict place where they are making me work - she would still be trotting round the school not daring to ask anything of me if it wasn't for this awful forum!

Please hurry up and ban it so I can come home and be horrid to her again!
 
I just take things in to my own hands.

I'm an expert at loosing shoes, attacking other horses, in fact I've got a new trick up my sleave, its called napping!

Yeeeeeeerh a little rear here and buck there and Kenzo went splat last Sunday afternoon, after she'd just spent £105.00 on me, stupid blonde bimbo ...n..o no not more PINK STUFF, this time it was the saddle fitter, unfortunately my saddle fits like glove, didnt keep her in the seat for very long though did it fella's *evil neighs*
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Infact I bet she's on there now, trying to figure out ways to stop me from doing it....she's safer on the HHO, best place for her!

sod the petition...I dont need one, Mackenzie rules, Kenzo can my dust from now on.
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Squealer here....find me a pen!
The mother has stopped me from having much fun spooking and jumping at anything and everything by drugging me with some sort of flower thingy. I was thoroughly enjoying leaping up into the air and feeling her backside tense up so bad that she could squash a walnut between her cheeks! This drug thingy is making me feel like a hippy on canabis (actually when i think about it - its quite good!)
x
 
My Darling Hovis

I know the evil witch who gave the advice to your owner - evil little toad covered my legs in yellow smelly gunk too. I had to resort to plastering my body in thick clay - have matted my belly and neck to perfection.

Luckily she also did the oily stuff to the pesty squirt horse - ha ha she also took all his hair off so he now looks like an oven ready turkey.

However, Stinky has mentioned to me that dumpling said I am next, apparently she is going to be chasing me, or perhaps it was a chaser clip she is going to attempt - lets see how a 5' dumpling deals with 17 hands of clyde this week.
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Even worse, now that the field is getting muddy, I can expect to have my tail washed and put in a big bag for the winter and Stinky has mentioned something called mane bags he has to wear - ha you watch me groom them off him - no way is my little boys' mane not getting a down to the roots groom.

Give me the petition - my hoof is waiting to make a signature.

Your ever loving Farra Clydesdale.
xx
 
Hi Hovis

Ruby here.

Sidney, Andrew ( if we can get him) and I would love to sign your partition.

However, mum is being pretty good to us at the moment but I am sure that she has some dastardly plan up her sleeve.... she always does
 
Murphy here,

Thanks to this HHO business my owner has got some crazy idea about me having to move a bit faster, when I was quite happy doing the slowest trot ever (I was rather proud of it).

Even worse than that, I was having so much fun dragging her around the yard until she turned up with this "pressure halter" thanks to suggestions on HHO and now I have to follow her around (quietly planning my revenge...).
 
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How many of you have trashed last years hideous rug thing only to have them produce another in some girly colour that so and so from HHO has got.

[/ QUOTE ]

hi Otto here, can relate to that Hovis, i proper trashed my manly navy blue rug last year and last week the tall lanky one turned up with a new one..the top half is LILAC !!as if that isn't bad enough, get this, the bottom half is navy with white spots!! All the other boys (in their manly rugs) gathered round the fence to have a good laugh. OH got to go,the old one says if i don't get off here she will post a photo of me in my new rug.
 
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