Pushy parents

Irishcobs

Irishcobs

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At the hunter trials today there were 2 ponies with small jockeys. There was a prize for the best under 10. One pony was dressed to the nines, tom thumb bit, martingale, breastplate, grakle. Mother was at the side line shouting to jump this, do that in the warm up. Bless the pony after one refusal it jumped everything the girl/mum asked, even though the girl was not given with the hands. They set off ok, a little hairy but not bad, then had trouble at the skinny after the water and mother goes down and tells the girl to carry on, girl doesn't want to. At the next fence the girl comes off and the pony p*sses off back to the trailer, eluding everyone on the way. She was down for a long time. Now why did she have to continue if she didn't want to, it was obvious in the warm up she was scared and these fences were not little!
The other girl was intructed by her father as to what to do in the warm up, she was doing well, a few naps but she was stopping the pony. On the course pony ran round the first fence, she was screaming at her dad that she didn't want to do it so he ran round with her. I was following them and over took them at fence 6. She was doing ok but the pony was just following dad.
Now why do these kids have to do it, clearly they are made to by pushy parents but that can either put them off for life or make them adrenaline junkies. Ok if they are on completely safe, push button ponies but needed (or wearing) grakles, martingales and strong bits doesn't look like a safe, push button pony.
 
I'd laugh is the parents were members of this forum and recognised the description of themselves!
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I do wonder what makes these parents tick. It isn't teaching them anything is it? Apart from how to cope with humiliation.

My parents never told me to do anything. If I couldn't get my pony to jump something it was up to me to find out why. If I threw any kind of brattish strop or suggested that I hated my pony I was threatened through gritted teeth with "Change your attitude smartish or we will be going home"!! I soon changed my attitude.

I know of a teenage girl who's mother entered her in to everything. If she didn't get around it there was never "Oh never mind dear" it was push push push all the way.

I can understand parents wanting the best for their children but there is a fine line between being constructive and being pushy.

I hear some hideous stories from my Nephews regarding their Rugby Club. The parents there seem to need to learn the meaning of sportsmanship and team games!!
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Dad said the same thing about the football team he used to coach. I think the parents are trying to get their children to be as good or better then they were as children but there is a right and wrong way about it.
 
i see it all the time they just scare the poor kids and by them to good of a pony that is too much for the kid or over horse them iv got a ten year old cusin that wasnt aloud to go affilated untill she had proper jumping possian and until she jumped 3 d cleares at 95 she is really brave but we work really hard to keep it that way she qualified 138 at scope and 138 dabual at hpi south view but diddnt take her this year as we thought she wasnt ready we neaver tell her of or shout at her if things go rong and if she diddnt want to do somethink we never make her she is on self produced ponies to she wonted to jump 138 hoys qualifer this year but we never let her
 
A friend overheard 1 mother telling her youngest daughter at a show that she "Let the whole family down" when she did badly in 1 class. The mother then turned on the middle daughter and tore her off a strip for not being warmed in yet.

Its a pity that social services don't do spot checks at shows!
 
A friend of mine had a really pushy mum when we were kids, we used to travel to the shows together, and she even resorted to not showing up on time so I missed my class when we were ahead on points lol! Seems that soon enough the kids hit the rebellious stage and give up and there's nothing the pushy parents can do.
 
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