quick question...when did.....

Chestnutmare

Chestnutmare

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you think about getting a new horse after your's had passed away?
Merlin has been gone for a couple of months and although i am still totally and utterley distraught about it I would like to home another one, so the point of this is when did you look at getting a new horse?
Just curious to know really although I do still have my little mare, and I know nothing will be like my boy.
 
my mum had a horse at the time when mine had to be put down, i found it very hard to go down and help, i would cry alot, then i started riding my mums sometimes it was great other times i would cry and say to my mum that i cant ride him hes not like blackie, so i went abit up and down and i loved my mums horse but i really missed blackie, my mum sold hers 10 months after blackie was put down., i didnt want to rush because i kept thinking nothing will come close to blackie, but then i went to an auction last year just for a look and my mum had been trying to get me to look at this foal but i must of been on my phone or something anyway when we were ready to go i said to my mum wow look at that foal hes a chunky monkey n she said thats the one i wanted you to look at, we ran to the man and asked if he was for sale, he said that he had just bought him but we could buy him of him, i knew we had to buy him because:
- my mum had been trying to get me to look at him
- i said chunky monkey (i used to call blackie cheeky monkey)
- i got a weird feeling in my stomach when i seen him
and plus he was a bargain lol
ive had him a year now and love him to pieces and it might sound weird but i think theres a part of blackie in him, some of the things he does and how he looks at me.

you will know when the times right hunni xxxx
 
I started looking through ads quite quickly. I had a very elderly mare that couldn't do anything so although I would love to still have her, even now, it was a new start for me.

It took me 7 months to absolutely decide what I wanted, and then 6 weeks to find her.
 
So sorry 4 ur loss. I started looking a month and had a new horse within 8weeks, I went from a horse back to a pony so he werent like my previous horse. I didnt think I would get a close bond again but my pony is very special 2 me
 
aww thats sounds lovely...I am at a loss atm as mare is only tiny for me and is unsound at present, and although I work with horses it doesnt come close to having your own again, I want to get back in the saddle and start doing more things but I also dont want two horses again...not just financial but time wise I always felt guilty doing the one when I couldnt do the other...
When do I start looking more to the point?? I think personally it would help me over come my loss if I got one sooner rather than later..as i'm just sat dwelling on the past and thats not great either is it?

Oh I dunno so confused really as to what to do..think I need a good kick up the backside
 
everyones different hun and only you will know when your ready, i think you need to think about if you really want one because youve just said you feel guilty about doing one when you couldnt do the other. have a good think about it and you will know when the time is right hun xxxx
 
I think that you're asking about it means you're already getting there, even if you're not completely convinced yet
smile.gif


It's the same with any pet - you're not replacing them and won't love the one you lost any less if you get another. It might help at first to look at adverts for horses that bear no resemblance to Merlin and see how you feel about that.

Would sharing or loaning be an option for a while instead of buying?

(((hugs)))
 
I bought my current horse about 8 weeks after my mare was PTS. He was the first one I'd looked at but I thought - no - can't buy the first one. So I went to see about 20, then bought one who reminded me of my mare. She was completely wrong for me & my dad made me take her back after 2 days. Thankfully I got my money back & went & rode my cob 3 more times (at the dealers insistance). After I brought him home it took me about 6 months to really bond with him but he is now my horse of a lifetime.

So - go ahead and look but dont get too emotional & take a sane rational person with you. Merlin would want you to be happy. Good Luck x
 
Pookie - I have been looking at adverts already I am not in a position to buy one yet, so would be looking at loaning with poss view to buy, I have thought about sharing but around here is quite expensive even for a sharer I am toying with the idea of rehoming an exracehorse, it's not the keeping of it it's the buying of one...think thats the prob, I could if i wanted to keep new one at work for a reduced fee but there's no winter t/o and for a racehorse esp it will need t/o, my new yard doesn't have any DIY spaces I took last one for my mare...so I have to really think about that too...
I have all the love in the world to give new horse and time, experience etc etc...but it's finding the right one...if I was ready in my head to look where on earth do I start?
I've looked at usual places...mags, on here, other websites
 
I went 8 weeks after my horse died to getting my new one, Icouldnt be with out a horse in my life. I needed to care for something and I did even look to buy not really i saw my girlie when being curious at the horses for sale on horse and hound I saw her nad juts by her photo I wanted to buy here she was perfect and so I did.
You may feel guilty I know i did but you have to think life goes on and youll never forget them. My girlie is the female version of my lil man anyway in every way but she has a blaze and he had a star lol

Sorry for your loss, things will get eaiser
 
I had made the decision to have my mare pts after a long battle with lamness. she went in the June 08 (i was devistated) i wasnt ready to buy another horse, as selfish as it sounds, to have to be that decision maker again was just something i couldnt handle, and if i'm honest i still couldnt, so in the August 08 i got a new one on loan (i realise there is a chance i may have to make that decision to have a loan pts, but not in the same way as i did for my mare).

Although i enjoyed the loan, he wasnt for me, and i now have another on a pretty much permenant loan. its been over a year since i lost my girl, i still get upset about loosing her, but i have to say, since getting my current loan in July 09, i havent been happier, and i can now remember the good times with my old girl, rather than focusing on loosing her, which is what i did while i was without a horse and with my previous loan (who i never really gelled with, and turned into a bit of a monster as he got fitter and better condition).

Loaning has definitely been the right decision for me!

You'll know when you are ready, i'm having so much fun with my new girl, and regularly say things like 'Betty would have loved this' (Betty was my old girl - chestnut in sig if you're interested) whereas, any mention of her name before getting my current loan horse did 'upset' me.

Best of luck - its such a difficult time - but it does get better, and my new horse has helped me heal no end.
 
thats really nice to hear from you all that you found your new horses, I would loan but as I have been out of that situation for so long where do I look, i'd want a long term loan poss perm loan for right horse.
I bought merlin from loaning him...so I guess you never know do you?

Thanks ever so much for helping like this, I needed more horsey people's advice, my OH has agreed to getting a new one when I feel the right time is upon me, I am getting to that stage as I really want to love another horse and have fun again like I used to.
 
[ QUOTE ]
Bought my horse 1 week after I lost the previous one, having tried it out a week before the other one was PTS.

[/ QUOTE ]

Similar to this, had my lad put down on Wednesday, picked the new one up on Saturday.
 
I lost mine in the august and got the new one in november, but it turned out to be a huge, costly and bone damaging choice. I was so distraught that i'd lost my horse of a life time i jumped head first in to getting a new one to fill the massive void, but should have waited. He soon went and then it was a good 4/5 months before i got the next one and i'm glad i waited as he's such a sweetie. I wouldnt be without him.
 
Couple of weeks for me. Nothing will ever replace my wonderful mare, but buying another would not diminish that. Everyone is different, and if you feel you want to buy again, why not?
 
thing is I need to sort Minnie out 1st and find her a lovely loan home as I dont want to do 2 again i know i probably sound selfish but I would like something I can do stuff with although right now minnie is my priority to get fixed!
seeing her tonight I just sat in her stable whilst she ate her dinner and kept looking at her wishing she was better and bigger...such a shame i could ride her when she's better but won't be able to do much with her...thats the problem
 
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