Recurring Bad Dream

Aw,that is sad you feel that way Stiff Knees but please be kind to yourself: dogs see only the present and Spot knew you were there with her so all was ok for her in that way. It is never the 'right' moment truly as there is always some awful emotional toll paid for making the kindest decision but we must do that. Although it is hard for you now, try to turn your mind to all the wonderful times that are free of guilt and sadness. I always think that whilst I am not ready to leave this world, when I do go it will be wonderful to see my animal companions again: wholesome and happy together. That is where Spot is at now: at least that is my belief!
 
You could try "turning it around". Maybe she is coming to you in your dreams saying "thank you - I am out of pain, and ready to play again".

Losing a very much beloved member of the family hurts - but you know you did the best for your girl. Xx
 
You sound like the sort of owner every dog deserves, so it is particularly sad that you feel you let her down. Im sure Spot wouldnt be thinking that, I dont know the back story but I very much doubt that you let her suffer a moment longer than was unavoidable, just think how much worse it could have been. When you love your dogs as we do you always try to make sure everything is right for them, just occasionally you dont always get it bang on, if you did that would make you perfect and very few of us are quite 100% perfect all the time. Please try to be a little kinder to yourself x
 
Thanks again everyone, I have received so much support since joining HHO, I dread to think what a mess I'd be in if I hadn't had that support. 🐾🐾🐾
 
EllenJay said:
You could try "turning it around". Maybe she is coming to you in your dreams saying "thank you - I am out of pain, and ready to play again".

Losing a very much beloved member of the family hurts - but you know you did the best for your girl. Xx
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Thank you EllenJay, the dreams don't feel positive, but perhaps that will change in time. Thank you for your kind words.
 
MyBoyChe said:
You sound like the sort of owner every dog deserves, so it is particularly sad that you feel you let her down. Im sure Spot wouldnt be thinking that, I dont know the back story but I very much doubt that you let her suffer a moment longer than was unavoidable, just think how much worse it could have been. When you love your dogs as we do you always try to make sure everything is right for them, just occasionally you dont always get it bang on, if you did that would make you perfect and very few of us are quite 100% perfect all the time. Please try to be a little kinder to yourself x
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Thank you. I think I was the lucky one, Spot was pretty amazing. 😍❤️
 
I think you are being very hard on yourself. I doubt it is ever how we would like it to be.

I look at my experience of having my dog PTS and there are things I wish I had done. I wish we had played more fetch before I took her to the vets, I feel she was robbed of her final game as I was just a bit too dumbstruck to play properly. When we got there she was a PITA. She wouldn't lay down or stay still for the vet. To look at you would think there was nothing wrong, she was full of life. She was PTS standing up because she was too full of beans to lay down. Stood up eating a chocolate bar.

I would have loved to have had her led in my arms, staring knowingly at me as it to say 'yes its time' but it rarely works out like that.
 
As someone else said, you gave Spot a wonderful life, 17 is a magnificent age for a Lab. You did the right thing at the right time. You had it all planned out in your head but Spot didn't, she just trusted you to do the right thing for her, which you did. There is no 'best' way to actually do the deed, it's different for every owner and every dog. I was born into a household with a dog and have had a lot of dogs, mostly Labs over my life time, in multiples, the only thing that every pts had in common was that I was there with the dog,except the 2 that were pts while under anaesthetic, which was the best thing at the time.

The one pts that I regret was for a cat who went to the vet for tests and was pts when I couldn't get there because of a flooded road near the surgery. I have just had to come to terms with that, I doubt the cat knew, really as she was very poorly.

You really don't have anything to feel guilty about and you must forgive yourself - you did the best thing possible for Spot under the circumstances at the time.
 
Pearlsasinger said:
As someone else said, you gave Spot a wonderful life, 17 is a magnificent age for a Lab. You did the right thing at the right time. You had it all planned out in your head but Spot didn't, she just trusted you to do the right thing for her, which you did. There is no 'best' way to actually do the deed, it's different for every owner and every dog. I was born into a household with a dog and have had a lot of dogs, mostly Labs over my life time, in multiples, the only thing that every pts had in common was that I was there with the dog,except the 2 that were pts while under anaesthetic, which was the best thing at the time.

The one pts that I regret was for a cat who went to the vet for tests and was pts when I couldn't get there because of a flooded road near the surgery. I have just had to come to terms with that, I doubt the cat knew, really as she was very poorly.

You really don't have anything to feel guilty about and you must forgive yourself - you did the best thing possible for Spot under the circumstances at the time.
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Thank you Pearlsasinger. I didn't have the dream last night. Yay. I'm hoping that just talking about it, or rather, typing about it, has helped to put the dream into context. I have also made an appointment to see a homeopath who is also a grief counsellor, perhaps taking that positive step has also helped, I'm not exactly looking forward to the consultation but I'm sure I'll feel better for it. She helped me when we lost our little terrier, Sam and our cat, Jackson. Some folk don't believe in that hocus pocus, but it has worked for me in the past so I'll try again. Honestly, just having this forum for support has been such a help for me. I'm very grateful. I'm hoping that Spot will come to me again in a dream but in a positive way, I miss her very badly. OH says she's far too busy greeting old friends and sniffing for crumbs to visit yet, but once all the old friends have been greeted and the crumbs have been snaffled up, she'll be back. I hope he is right. 🐾😍
 
I hope you're doing ok OP.
Don't feel guilty for what you did, it was the right thing to do. You took great care of Spot right to the very end, and she loves you all the more for it.

More hugs your way.
 
ElectricChampagne said:
I hope you're doing ok OP.
Don't feel guilty for what you did, it was the right thing to do. You took great care of Spot right to the very end, and she loves you all the more for it.

More hugs your way.
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Thank you, I'm doing better. I had the appointment today with the Homeopath and she was very kind, just let me ramble on and on and on... and had lots of tissues at the ready. She gave me some remedies. I had another dream free night last night but it was gin assisted so I'm not sure it counts. I'm trying to head off to bed in a positive state of mind, I'm not sure you can influence dreams but it's worth a try 🤔 Jake has needed me a bit more these last few days as his arthritis has flared up so that has given me something else to focus on too.
 
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