Rescue dog wont leave my side

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darkhorse123

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Just yesterday my new boy came to live with me and my family - he is just 4, spent past 4 weeks in kennels after he was found by a local council having being left alone in a house for 3 days when his owner became ill.
The owner then signed him over.
The rescue have got some basic info on him - mainly that though he is only 4 I am at least his 3rd owner,his previous owner only had him 2 years.

He is such a lovely dog - so so sweet and adores cuddles and attention. But I feel so sorry for him because its obvious he is petrified he will be left again.

He will not leave my side - if Im on the couch he will snuggle up very happily but he watches me all the time - the poor thing cant relax. He follows me in the kitchen, to the loo - right now im doing some emails so instead of being on the comfy couch or rug under the radiator he is laid on my wooden floorboards under my chair!

I have a horse - when i went to the yard this morning he cried - my husband had to cuddle him the whole time i was out. When I went this afternoon my daughter had to do the same thing - else he just sat at at our door crying.

Iam not working at the moment but I will have to leave him home alone sometimes.

I know its just a time thing, he needsto trust Im not going to desert him - but has anyone any tips or maybe advice I havent thought of that may help him?
Ive tried giving him teddies to cuddle but he is just not interested.

I feel so so sorry for the poor lad and just want to help him settle as quick as I can - i so wish he could understand he has a home for life now!

Everything else is fine - he has made himself right at home, eating well etc - even the fireworks arent bothering him !

So - any advice, tips on how to help him feel less anxious, help him understand this is his forever home ????
 
Ostrich said:
For all that it got into a bit of a debate :rolleyes: I think this thread has some excellent advice :)

http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/showthread.php?t=494260
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^^^^^ that Ostrich speaks such common sense at times;):D

The thread should be ideal for what you need to start in regard to rouine to help this dog feel comfortable in his own company, I would dare bet this is whey he has ended up with you (very common issues in rescue dogs), you give a perfect example of "why constant attention and reassurance" creates SEPARATION ANXIETY!
Please read every reply on the above link and take the advice, and try to stop yourselves reassuring this dog with attention/affection as it seems he has severe separation issues and you need to help him to get over this.
 
Ty both so so much - i have read it all and realised Ive been very silly and making a huge rod for mine and this poor boys back - ty so so much from me and my new boy, Ive replied on that wonderful post. :D
 
I have not read the other thread that's posted but I would suggest not cuddling and consoling him when he is crying to be honest. I know it can be hard bti a bit of ignoring or distraction may be better. If he's following you about I would just sort of ignore him and get on with what you're doing. If he cries when you leave and there is someone still in the house then I would say they either leave him be or try some distraction/training type activities when you've gone. If he's food motivated then this should be quite easy. You OH and daughter could just do the odd bit of sit, stay, down type training and reward wth food or give him a kong filled with some peanut butter or something so he associates you leaving with something actually positive.

It is very early days but I think best not to mollycoddle to start off no matter how hard it may be.
 
You have to make yourself harder of heart.:( In his best interests, don't feel sorry for him and baby him. Soothing and fussing him when he's anxious will do him no favours in the long run. If you go to the loo etc and he follows, ignore him, do the deed :o and ignore him again. He's bound to feel unsure and anxious at the moment and in time he will gain confidence. You're going through the "getting to know each other phase" but don't the mistake of comforting him when he's anxious, you have to show him there's nothing to be anxious about.:)
 
ladyt25 said:
I have not read the other thread that's posted but I would suggest not cuddling and consoling him when he is crying to be honest. I know it can be hard bti a bit of ignoring or distraction may be better. If he's following you about I would just sort of ignore him and get on with what you're doing. If he cries when you leave and there is someone still in the house then I would say they either leave him be or try some distraction/training type activities when you've gone. If he's food motivated then this should be quite easy. You OH and daughter could just do the odd bit of sit, stay, down type training and reward wth food or give him a kong filled with some peanut butter or something so he associates you leaving with something actually positive.

It is very early days but I think best not to mollycoddle to start off no matter how hard it may be.
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ty ladyt- yes after reading that post you are obviously quite right and I was very very wrong - well we all were - myself, my husband and daughter. I am so pleased to have got this advice here from you all - dread ot think what we would have very unintentionally done to him otherwise - he would have ended up an absolute nervous wreck x
 
blazingsaddles said:
You have to make yourself harder of heart.:( In his best interests, don't feel sorry for him and baby him. Soothing and fussing him when he's anxious will do him no favours in the long run. If you go to the loo etc and he follows, ignore him, do the deed :o and ignore him again. He's bound to feel unsure and anxious at the moment and in time he will gain confidence. You're going through the "getting to know each other phase" but don't the mistake of comforting him when he's anxious, you have to show him there's nothing to be anxious about.:)
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Ty- I will starting right this minute, im so pleased i asked this question so early on ie first full day of him being home x
 
I'd strongly recommend that you crate train him. Put him in the crate (with a few biscuits and a nice old blanket) for SHORT periods when you're around - and gradually increase the periods - including when you have to go out!

I obtained a lovely black Lab about 5 weeks ago - at about 14 weeks of age. She was quite insecure and a bit dim - which culminated in her trying to beat the rear wheel of my 4x4 which was travelling VERY slowly from house to yard! I ran right over her - cue speedy trip to vet and exploratory surgery (as they thought she was bleeding internally!) Miraculously, she wasjust badly bruised.

Because she's so daft around vehicles (and horses!) and because I'm busy on the yard during the day - I have a crate in the tackroom and she goes in there for several hours at a time and is let out for play and cuddles at coffee breaks and lunch time. She has VERY quickly settled into this as a routine. She sees the crate as HER place - and even voluntarily puts herself into the crate I have at the house for my rescue Springer - when he is in one of immensely stupid and aggressive moods with my terrier!

I know I've been a bit 'soft' with her since her accident - and she's still a bit silly and clingy - but she IS getting much better!
 
darkhorse123 said:
ty ladyt- yes after reading that post you are obviously quite right and I was very very wrong - well we all were - myself, my husband and daughter. I am so pleased to have got this advice here from you all - dread ot think what we would have very unintentionally done to him otherwise - he would have ended up an absolute nervous wreck x
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It is hard, as you want to cuddle them and because you feel sorry for them if they've got a bit of a sob story as it were, you feel you want to comfort them! However, although the dog is clingy it doesn't know how sad it's story is, he's just trying to find some stability I guess. When we first got our last rescue dog she curled up in the corner of the room she was so scared. We just had to leave her be though and let he come to us. Then she suffered separation anxiety and destroyed a whole lot of my mum and dad's carpet, chewed a saddle, destroyed a large plant...... lol. We got her a crate then and I hold my hands up, I was pretty anti crate but it worked wonders for her (and my parent's furniture). I think she saw it as her 'safe place' and after a few months of putting her in there whenever we went out she got over her anxiety.
 
JanetGeorge said:
I'd strongly recommend that you crate train him. Put him in the crate (with a few biscuits and a nice old blanket) for SHORT periods when you're around - and gradually increase the periods - including when you have to go out!

I obtained a lovely black Lab about 5 weeks ago - at about 14 weeks of age. She was quite insecure and a bit dim - which culminated in her trying to beat the rear wheel of my 4x4 which was travelling VERY slowly from house to yard! I ran right over her - cue speedy trip to vet and exploratory surgery (as they thought she was bleeding internally!) Miraculously, she wasjust badly bruised.

Because she's so daft around vehicles (and horses!) and because I'm busy on the yard during the day - I have a crate in the tackroom and she goes in there for several hours at a time and is let out for play and cuddles at coffee breaks and lunch time. She has VERY quickly settled into this as a routine. She sees the crate as HER place - and even voluntarily puts herself into the crate I have at the house for my rescue Springer - when he is in one of immensely stupid and aggressive moods with my terrier!

I know I've been a bit 'soft' with her since her accident - and she's still a bit silly and clingy - but she IS getting much better!
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You see how littel i know about rehoming older dogs!
I didnt think you could do this with an older dog (start them in one)!
My old boy had one from day one-he was a shih tsu and at 6 weeks old far too tiny to be running around the house loose at busy family times.
He too loved it and would go in on his own accord whenever he wanted peace and quiet - it was his hidey hole, my children knew never ever to touch or even speak to him if he was in there. I kept it under my kitchen table so it really was like a den- I just didnt think an older dog not used to one would accept it!
Ty -i will try one because I do like them - plus tbh I am a bit worried about what he might do when he is home alone !
 
Oh, and partly because I have just found out how to get my pics on here and partly so you can see what we were dealing with - this was out rescue Boots! She is now a very well-adjusted dog although she does love her toys (that pink thing is her favourite flamingo toy!) she has such powerful jaws though she ripped up carpet an underlay during her separation anxiety phase! She was 9mth when we got her, is 5/6 now. Doing her best butter wouldn't melt expression!



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Now you definitely need to post some pics of yours!!
 
Oh she is so sweet!
Mine is a lhaso-poo. A cross between a lhaso apso and a poodle - pure white. He is beautiful.
- Ill ask mydaughter to upload a pic for me when she is home tomorrow
 
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