Rubbish Mum - Fed Up

UnpaidGroom

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I got my pony about 4/5 weeks ago, I have already developed a really good bond with him and absolutely love him to bits! He is fine on the ground, being led and groomed etc, he's a realy gentleman but whenever I try to get him to do any sort of work he just refuses.

He won't lunge, he won't be ridden in the school or out on the road. He just stops dead and will not move - when I tried to push him on out on a hack the other day he reared twice. Coming home on a hack, he is fine. I have had feet and back checked and there doesn't seem to be any problems causing him pain or anything - I can only put it down to my rubbishness! I don't think he likes leaving the other horses - could his behaviour be down to this?

This really wasn't how I imagined things would be - I thought we would be floating round the school and exploring the countryside together! I just feel like a complete failure.

It feels like he would be so much more happy if I just left him in the field chilling out and just brought him in to groom him and pamper him. I enjoy that part of owning a pony but I would really like to be able to ride him too!

He is ex-riding school and when I tried him he was fine. I feel like I can't do anything right - it even had me in tears yesterday.

If anyone can offer me some advice I would be really grateful x.
 
It does sound like he is trying it on and has learnt what he can get away with. Would it be possible to get either a more experienced friend or pay a reputable professional to ride him out for you and assess his behavior and how easy it would be to put right?
 
My horse was an absolute pain in the backside for the first 8 weeks or so. He took ages to settle in, he was stressy, nappy, and difficult.

All of a sudden he relaxed and became a lot happier in his work- a different horse altogether!

Don't be too despondant, perhaps he just needs a little more time? If he is an ex riding school horse doing things on his own in a new environment will take a lot of adjustment for him.

I found long reining my horse around routes he was particularly nappy on on his own really helped build his confidence and trust in me. Is he ok when ridden with other horses?

Loving your username BTW
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he's napping - often happens with a new horse who will be testing the boundaries of what he can get away with! But don't take this as a reason to lose your temper with him.

you need to con him into doing what you want - will he hack out with another horse?
if you're stuck on your own can you make him reverse? ie turn him round then make him walk backwards (for as long as it takes - all the way round if necessary!) in the direction you want - he'll soon learn that simply going forwards is much less hassle than going backwards! It is also a non-confrontational way of getting what you want.

Good luck - I'm sure you'll sort it out.
 
if he's ex-riding school, he's really used to doing things in a group. it is a very very big deal for a horse or pony to go out on its own with just a rider, it is contrary to all its instincts. if you think about zebras on the plains (which is what your pony is really, deep down, inside!) safety is in numbers. go off on your own, get eaten, simple. the herd instinct is the most important one they have.
you don't say how old he is, but it doesn't make a lot of difference. make sure you can get someone to come with you next time, ideally on another horse or pony (a well-behaved one, which does as it's told), or even a parent or friend on a push-bike, or on foot. (if on a bike, make sure they stay in front, not alongside you, in case the pony shies at something... a heap of pony, bike and 2 riders is not fun. i've been there.)
he should go along with someone else. this is a start. it may take months until you can get him to hack out alone. get some help from someone more experience than you, as long as they are patient with him.
him not lungeing is naughty... ask someone more experienced to lunge him, to show him that he WILL do it, and to show you how to get him to do it! although, i don't really know why you'd want to lunge him, tbh.
i'd ride him round the arena or field if you have to be on your own. don't ask a lot of him at first, be happy if he goes where you want him to go. give him lots of praise with your voice when he's good, and a very stern NO if he isn't!
good luck.
 
As others have already said he's napping and his time in a riding school could be at the core of this. The chances are he's been used in group lessons where he spends most of his time following another horse. You've taken him away from that and are asking him to put his trust in you instead. Theres nothing terribly unusual about a horse doing everything foot perfect with a rider on the ground (i.e. leading) and then turning into a monster when ridden. My horse will walk past anything without batting an eyelid if im walking next to him, yet on his back, a leaf turns into a potential horse eater.

The hacking - personally id try and get a more experience friend or a teacher to try with, and id have him in company at least to begin with. Rearing up on roads isnt something you want to be getting into but equally, if you give into him when he does that, then you're reinforcing his behaviour.

Id be starting with school work. At least there you're in an enclosed area where you're relatively safe.

When you say he "wont lunge" - what exactly is he doing? Are you using a lunge whip ?

Does he also rear in the school if you try and force him into going forwards? Id be going right back to basics with him and just try and get him comfortably walking round the school, happily doing changes of rein and circles before considering anything else. When he stops what exactly are you doing? Kicking him on? Smacking him?

Lastly, get an instructor in to help you
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Thank you guys, you give me hope!

I would never lose my temper with him, that wouldn't solve anything and I'm way to soft for that anyway!

I haven't had the opportunity to ride him out with anyone else yet so I don't know what he is like out with other horses. I will try long reining him and see how we go with that. I know I have to be patient because as you said 'Izt' - it will probably take him some time to get adjust to the change in environment and working on his own etc.

I just worry that I am not doing him justice - I am, admittedly, a bit soppy! He is a sensitive boy and I just want him to be happy and have some fun with me! For now I think I will stick to patience and lots of ground work.
 
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just worry that I am not doing him justice - I am, admittedly, a bit soppy! He is a sensitive boy and I just want him to be happy and have some fun with me! For now I think I will stick to patience and lots of ground work.

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I think you will be just fine.

Amy May was an ex riding school horse - and boy did we go through it. We hacked out in company only for the first month or so - and then I decided to go it alone.

Now the one thing that really helped her was not to be worked in the school. The school represented boredom, kids with flapping legs, and being made to do things that were not enjoyable. I had to get her to think forward, and enjoy the sights and sounds of the world outside the confines of a four sided arena.

We had some battles, but overall she turned out to be wonderful in so many ways. And she was the most fantastic hunter.

Do go out in a crowd and have fun. Try to do lots of cantering, playing and galloping - anything to get him thinking forward. And if you can take him hunting. It may not be your thing - but your pony will probably love it.

Good luck. Ex riding school horses are always a challenge. But hopefully ultimately rewarding.
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I used to ride a pony like that. She just refused to budge, nothing and no one could make her move when you sat on her. She came with another Connemara gelding ( she was pure reg Connie too) and both were meant to have been ridden but trned out for a few months. The other pony was flying and was registered and jumping SJAI in no time, but we still couldnt get the mare to move on the lunge or under saddle ( when i say we - she belonged to my instructor and he tried riding her as well).
She had a bred a Class 1 Connie foal previously ( she was 6 when she came to the yard) so it was decided she would be put back inot foal the following spring and she was turned away in the meantime. The following Jan, Tom decided to try again - for 4 weeks he went back to basics and rebroke her from scratch. Then he got me to reback her and we had a significant improvemment. The first few days we had her follow a riding school pony around the indoor and then the fields - splitting up occasionalyand doing plenty of circling away from the other horse. At first she wouls stop the odd time when walking but a slight squeeze and she would move again.
In other horses we have had - rebreaking was a big help. Long reining may be more effective than lunging to get your horse moving. Hoefully things will work out for you though. I know the problem is napping - but sometimes riding with another horse but not allowing your horse to depend on him can help getting him move forward.
 
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For now I think I will stick to patience and lots of ground work.

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Don't give up on the ridden work, he will come around and it will be a shame for you to miss out. Some ponies do plant when they are insecure and he is probably not used to doing anything by himself.

As others have said going out in the company of another horse is the best start. Also you can start in the school in the same way.

If you don't have another horse to follow to get you started ask someone to walk in front of you or lead - only do a little bit to start with and increase it each time. You do not need to get cross with him but you do need to be firm, by asking for a small improvement each time you should be able to avoid rearing etc. Make sure you finish each session doing something you have asked him to do even if it's only a small thing.

Having had an ex riding school pony myself I know how dependent they can be on other horses as it's all they have known. Mine is now very well behaved hacking alone or in company, when I got him he would nap and bolt for home if we tried to go out alone so I know it can be done!
 
Thank you very much everyone, for the posts. I have received loads of good advice and encouragement. It's great to hear from others who have been in a similar situation and overcome it. It must be a really big thing for him to start working alone. I feel much more positive now and hopefully I will be able to get someone to walk or bike with me next time I take him out as I haven't really got anyone to ride out with at the moment.

Thanks again! x
 
What you call napping, we call barn sour or buddy sour. I agree with all the advice thus far and would add this. When he balks, try turning him in a small circle, pivoting on his rear quarters if possible. When he gets tired of going in circles he will move forward. The other thing, when he does this do not bring him back to the yard and immediately untack, groom and feed him. This only rewards poor behavior. If he naps when you ride and you have to come back, tie him, fully tacked, for an hour or so and make him wait. Then he will learn that his poor behavior doesn't get him anywhere. Try not to end a ride at the same place each time. When you are hacking out and return, ride past the yard a little way and then come back. This will teach him that reaching the yard doesn't always mean that his work will end. Also never feed immediately after you finish riding. Make him wait a while. It is better for him any way especially if he is hot from working
 
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