Saying goodbye?

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corribsurprise

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When you've had a horse put down, do you/would you let the others say goodbye to it? Just wondering what's the kindest course - to let the survivors know what happened to their friend or to protect them?
Thanks
 
I have always let them say goodbye. The first time I didn't think and my mare spent ages wondering where her man had gone. Very sad either way though :(
 
Yes I would let them say goodbye. I would normally do the deed in the field, then let the others go and have a sniff etc.
 
yes I think its quite important to most horses to know or understand where there mate has gone, esp those that were close to said horse as like us they mourn.
 
Definitely, yes. It's important and they absolutely understand what's happened. Seen it too often not to know for certain. If you can bear to, observe the proceedings as they check their friend and the closure happens. Then you'll know, too.
 
brighteyes said:
It's important and they absolutely understand what's happened.
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Agree 100%.
We've always made sure a horse is shot as near as possible to the others while they are turned out at the other side of a fence. On the one occasion we couldn't, we let the others into the paddock a pony had died in so they could see him. They don't see it as macabre and will calmly accept what's happened on the whole. They may (just may) paw at the body and perhaps get a bit scatty, but let them do that - they won't do any harm.

The fellmonger local to us is very, very good and will take a new customer through the process then allow time for the horses to sort out their thoughts before taking the body. It helps a lot. I hope you can find somebody as good.
 
Yes I definetely would not hesitate under any circumstances but most people would be horrified at this which I think is really sad as people don't understand and have enough problems contemplating the death of the animal in question without considering their own horses feelings. Of course if the dead horse is not a close friend of your own horse but is in the herd its not so necessary. My friend had a mare and gelding who had shared a large stable (albeit with a low partition across) and been turned out together in the same field for about 20 years (they were both old). The mare died of colic and the gelding literally pined away for her and developed laminitis and from what I remember colic which killed him in the end. My friend felt sure he had pined away. I would also treat each horse left behind that was close to the deceased horse with Rescue Remedy or Star of Bethlehem (which is in rescue remedy) as this helps with bereavement. You shouldn't let horses see the actual death and a few times we have had a horse on the yard put down due to accident, ie broken leg we have had to take all the horses out of their field except the friend and then remove their friend just before the vet arrived.

I think it is really important, but this is something that needs to be discussed with people before the event. You cannot ask someone who has just lost a horse for its mate to see the body as its just not a reasonable request to someone who is feeling highly emotional and upset. If my horse was turned out with a close friend I would have definetely had this discussion before now with the owner. xx
 
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corribsurprise said:
When you've had a horse put down, do you/would you let the others say goodbye to it? Just wondering what's the kindest course - to let the survivors know what happened to their friend or to protect them?
Thanks
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When one of the brood mares broke her leg and had to be put down, her life long friend wouldn't leave her. Our vet told us to leave them together for a couple of days so that she could grieve in her own time. He was right once she realised her friend was gone she left her side. It's heart renching but they need to grieve just as we do.
 
miac said:
When one of the brood mares broke her leg and had to be put down, her life long friend wouldn't leave her. Our vet told us to leave them together for a couple of days so that she could grieve in her own time. He was right once she realised her friend was gone she left her side. It's heart renching but they need to grieve just as we do.
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Awwww very sad!!
 
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