Should i just sell both and get something more novice?

[Parkranger]

Appreciate some opinions here.....

I'm going to sell Ty in a few weeks as he's probably only going to be a hacking horse and we've had a few 'issues' in the past so i can never fully trust him (even though I love him to bits)

I've got another horse (Oscar) who is another TB x (more TB though) and I really think I've overhorsed myself (again).

We've had napping issues in the past which I overcome but tonight I couldn't even get him off the yard - he kept threatening to rear and because of the falls I've had on Ty (rearing when jumping and me coming off backwards) I just can't be strong enough with him.

Deep down I'm not even sure he would rear but I just feel like jacking it all in and waiting until something nice and safe comes along!

Oscar is a great little horse in all other respects but maybe he needs a bit more of an experienced rider who will just ride through the tantrum.....

 

[JessPickle]

what about having a few lessons on something schoolmaster or very trustworthy type, see if they give you a confidence boost.

 

[Parkranger]

Still have to hack out the same horse though! My confidence really is fragile and I've been jumping and had a great lesson on Oscar in the week but today he was just being an arse.

I'm just getting fed up of napping horses and my confidence being ruined every week....makes me seem really up and down and I'm not like that!

I don't always have someone to hack out with and I always said i'd never own a horse I couldn't hack out alone - seeing as it's one of the things i enjoy most!

 

[chillidragon]

You know, I've been thinking about this for a long time with Brandy too. I'm not a pushy person and she's a fiery little monster who needs a firmer hand, so I've worked out two possibilities: (a) she will scare me enough one day that it damages or even destroys my confidence, I will give up and she will 'learn' that her bad behaviour is rewarded, or (b) I will stick it out and eventually (as I've already promised myself last year, and the year before, etc.) we will come to a gentler understanding that all this silliness is a waste of time and effort. Quite honestly, as the days go by I am fixating on (a). I don't want to be an Olympic rider or a hunting goddess or whatever. I just want to have a quiet hack. So my point (after all this burbling) is, what do you want most out of your riding? A quiet, gentle, safe hack? Or a light-speed blast over a cross country course? Or something inbetween? Or something else? Then ask yourself if your horses, with you on board, are up to what you want, and if they're not, then I think that going for a quieter, easier ride is absolutely the right thing to do. If you think that there may come a time when one of them tries something really spectacular that you can't deal with it, you may inadvertently be training them to become dangerously unrideable, and there aren't many happy future careers for horses like that. Projecting to the next few years, what would you like to be doing and what would you like for your horses, which ever ones they happen to be? The important thing is that you're happy, and that your horses are happy, and if you've come to the point where you've started to dread tacking up and riding, this is a BIG indication that it's time to seriously rethink.

 

[claireross]

Poor you. The problem is your horse will react to your lack of confidence. I sold a horse after 7months who I just couldn't get along with, but now own a horse I've had since a 3yr old and although he can be a pratt I just don't seem to lack the confidence like I did with the previous horse. Somethimes I think you either click with them or not.

Remember riding is meant to be fun and if it's not maybe you should consider a different horse.

 

[frb]

Is a difficult issue. My boy was sold to me as quiet but can be very sharp, can buck and spook but overall i have persevered over the past four years and on the whole he is a very good boy, he just has quirks! We were also hit by a car so traffic a huge issue, and like you, hacking is what i do and enjoy most, supposedly! He has taught me a lot, rather than something quiet, but i know i would prefer something quieter, but i could never part with him. However, yours sounds much worse, and at the end of the day, you have to be SAFE, and happy. Costs way too much for you not to be, you cannot be in danger of hurting yourself, and being miserable by worrying yourself to death.
If my boy had been worse I would have had to have sold him. You must be honest with yourself, you don't want to lose your confidence or risk an accident, you want to enjoy your riding! I feel for you!

 

[Parkranger]

That's the thing - Oscar has never scared me until tonight......i want a horse I can gallop on, jump, take hunting and just not worry about surviving!

Just feel like a complete bloody failure and feel that I should just give up!

You're right about Oscar though - my fear is that I don't want to bugger him up when he's quite talented - someone else could probably take him far....

 

[Parkranger]

[ QUOTE ]
Is a difficult issue. My boy was sold to me as quiet but can be very sharp, can buck and spook but overall i have persevered over the past four years and on the whole he is a very good boy, he just has quirks! We were also hit by a car so traffic a huge issue, and like you, hacking is what i do and enjoy most, supposedly! He has taught me a lot, rather than something quiet, but i know i would prefer something quieter, but i could never part with him. However, yours sounds much worse, and at the end of the day, you have to be SAFE, and happy. Costs way too much for you not to be, you cannot be in danger of hurting yourself, and being miserable by worrying yourself to death.
If my boy had been worse I would have had to have sold him. You must be honest with yourself, you don't want to lose your confidence or risk an accident, you want to enjoy your riding! I feel for you!

[/ QUOTE ]

My problem is that I like pretty horses

Just annoys me that I wimped out with Oscar tonight as when he's napped before I've just pushed him through it.

A lady from the yard walked in front of me for a bit and then he started to nap on the road.......

 

[Parkranger]

[ QUOTE ]
Poor you. The problem is your horse will react to your lack of confidence. I sold a horse after 7months who I just couldn't get along with, but now own a horse I've had since a 3yr old and although he can be a pratt I just don't seem to lack the confidence like I did with the previous horse. Somethimes I think you either click with them or not.

Remember riding is meant to be fun and if it's not maybe you should consider a different horse.

[/ QUOTE ]

problem is I don't seem to 'click' with anything.....well that's a lie - I've ridden a few friends horses who were fine.

Just want an uncomplicated horse - I don't mind the odd buck, spook but rearing is just something I can't handle

To be fair, Oscar didn't rear with me but he was adament he wasn't going out of the yard and just kept bunny hopping.....

 

[frb]

You did not wimp out, everyone has their limits and you had to be safe, rather than upset yourself and horse more. Don't be too hard on yourself, you are brave for trying as you have been.

 

[palomino_pony]

[ QUOTE ]
That's the thing - Oscar has never scared me until tonight......i want a horse I can gallop on, jump, take hunting and just not worry about surviving!

Just feel like a complete bloody failure and feel that I should just give up!

You're right about Oscar though - my fear is that I don't want to bugger him up when he's quite talented - someone else could probably take him far....

[/ QUOTE ]

I think you have answered your own question. Get something you feel confident on.

 

[redmerl]

Sorry you are having a rough time with your neddys at the moment.

I do understand. I owned the most stunning kind horse I have ever found but he was very hard to ride (boardering on dangerous). I decided after much debating, that he needed to live with someone better than me.

I let him go very cheap and was brutally honest about him. His new mum is fantastic and he has a home for life, but I still think 'what if'.

Sorry not much help.

 

[Parkranger]

mmmm, I'm thinking that perhaps I should put today down to him being a knob, me being in a mood and revisit tomorrow?

either way I think I need to crack the napping as it's just down right rude........

I was going to take him to a show on sunday and wonder if I just put too much pressure on myself. Might just take him and do a 'most handsome gelding' class or something to build up my confidence.

We've had an amazing few weeks and maybe it's my fault for not hacking him out on his own enough?

he apparently showjumped in his last home so maybe he didn't do much hacking out?

 

[burtondog]

I overhorsed last time and it eroded my confidence to the point where I started to think I didn't like riding. A friend reminded me "riding's supposed to be fun" which was the push I needed. I made the difficult decision to sell and bought a horse that was more suitable horse me and in just a few rides all my confidence came back.

If you think it's the right decision for you, do it.

 

[Parkranger]

thanks BD. I'm not at that point yet I don't think - I'm going to try and put it down to a bad day and try again tomorrow. If i can't get him out then i'm bloody well lead him in hand!

No, I WILL get him out tomorrow. I've got to realise that he's not going to rear or he would have done it by now....I think!

 

[DiablosGold]

[ QUOTE ]
That's the thing - Oscar has never scared me until tonight......i want a horse I can gallop on, jump, take hunting and just not worry about surviving!

Just feel like a complete bloody failure and feel that I should just give up!

You're right about Oscar though - my fear is that I don't want to bugger him up when he's quite talented - someone else could probably take him far....

[/ QUOTE ]

*whispers* Get a decent cob!

In all seriousness, loss of confidence can be heart breaking, now with my cob I am gradually getting mine back, with the hope of taking him hunting *fingers crossed* this year.

Good luck whatever you decide.

 

[magic104]

So long as you have ruled everything out for the behaviour then you are better off selling then loosing your confidence. We have owned Mo 5yrs this yr, so pretty well know her quiet well. When she started pulling faces when being girthed, I got the saddle checked, when that was given the ok she was booked in to have her back etc checked. In the meantime she went off jumping & I had put that down to her loosing confidence on the grass (she kept sliding behind) & the fact she had been left unshod behind for 4yrs. It was because she had some issues in her kneck, wither & croup. Now they have been sorted she is back to normal. I am not saying to you that there is a problem with your horses, but not eveyone rules these things out. Not all partnerships work out, there comes a time when you have to call it a day for the sake of both parties.