Should you expect negative comments when posting about your horse?

Girlracer

Girlracer

Well-Known Member
Joined
11 September 2008
Messages
2,712
Location
Worcestershire
Visit site
After reading a few threads over the past few weeks, it seems people expect everyone to be positive over their animals, even if there is a glaringly obvious problem.

If you post a photo of you horse, and it's really obvious it's in poor condition (be it obese or skinny needs farrier attention whatever) can you really expect NO ONE to comment on it? Even if you've covered it in a previous thread, you can't expect everyone to of read it can you? And surely you can't expect someone genuinely concerned over the welfare of the horse not to voice their opinion?

When i first took on the Warmblood i brought on over a few years he was a complete hat rack and we really struggled to get the right feeding/work regime to maintain weight and develop muscle. So when posting photos of his skinny little ways, i always expected someone new to comment, and always explained the situation? Although he's gone back to his owner, he now looks fabulous even at the grand old age of 27, but there was a time where he looked dreadful.

Even now when i post a photo of Major, i personally think he is looking good condition, but there will always be someone who see's something you haven't. Now surely it would be a positive for them to let you know? I appreciate of course that there are good and bad ways of going about voicing your opinion ;)
 
i think you can be honest and say what you think BUT it should be done tactfully instead of 'shouting' at the person who is asking about their horse. most of the time the owner knows there's a problem and is doing all they can to sort it so they don't need people to state the obvious in nasty ways.
for the people that don't know their horse has a problem then having a go at them just puts their backs up and makes them not want to listen to advice/constructive criticsm.

again some people post a pic to ask how their horse is looking now, it's hard for the owners to see a difference in their own horses because they see them every day so an outsiders opinion is sometimes valuable to the owner.

all should be done with tact though. what's the point in harping on and on about the negatives, explain things and move on, hopefully the owner will listen and take it on board.
 
Posts that only say good things and don't point out any problems (but in a positive way is good) are pleasant but you learn very little from them. For a forum to operate well there needs to be a wide debate coming from experience and intelligence, covering the good and the bad and with helpful advice.
 
Clava said:
Posts that only say good things and don't point out any problems (but in a positive way is good) are pleasant but you learn very little from them. For a forum to operate well there needs to be a wide debate coming from experience and intelligence, covering the good and the bad and with helpful advice.
Click to expand...

Echo this
 
I think if you put a post up you should expect good and bad comments, and receive them gracefully. I cant see the point of putting up a post asking 'do you think I should of done this' or ' is what I am doing ok' and then get stroppy when someone says no!
 
Yes. However some people do not understand the difference between criticism and constructive criticism, and just post blunt, hurtful things under the guise of "not being a fluffy bunny". Then the OP is just offended/upset, and a row follows.

Equally, if you post a comment/advice and it is not taken, you should let it go. Some people go on and on insisting that their advice is taken for pages. Nobody has to take your advice. If they don't, it was nice of you to offer, but its their problem. Perhaps you should carry on insisting if it is life and death, but usually its just a teenager with a less than perfect position that upsets everyone!
 
benson21 said:
I think if you put a post up you should expect good and bad comments, and receive them gracefully. I cant see the point of putting up a post asking 'do you think I should of done this' or ' is what I am doing ok' and then get stroppy when someone says no!
Click to expand...

Agree with this. If you can't take it, don't post it.
But at the same time, it wouldn't hurt a few people to sugar wrap their cruel words sometimes and put them in a nicer way.
 
I think if you are going to put a pic up of your pride and joy for a forum full of strangers of enormously varying experience and expertise to comment on then you really need to be prepared to take the useful comments and ignore the ones you find hurtful or unecessary.

If you are so sensitive that you must only recieve glowing comments then I think it best not to put the pic up in the first place otherwise it will only end in upset or a slagging match.

My mare is a work in progress. I am very happy with how she is going, but I would never put a pic up for 'constructive crit' or a video of me riding her. My instructor covers my riding, and I, along with my vet/saddler/back lady/farrier/dentist etc keep an eye on the rest!! I read posts on here and decide if the information would work for my mare and I. I'm not insterested in putting up a pic and watch the mud slinging!!
 
Honey08 said:
Yes. However some people do not understand the difference between criticism and constructive criticism, and just post blunt, hurtful things under the guise of "not being a fluffy bunny". Then the OP is just offended/upset, and a row follows.

Equally, if you post a comment/advice and it is not taken, you should let it go. Some people go on and on insisting that their advice is taken for pages. Nobody has to take your advice. If they don't, it was nice of you to offer, but its their problem. Perhaps you should carry on insisting if it is life and death, but usually its just a teenager with a less than perfect position that upsets everyone!
Click to expand...

^^This!
 
I think it's often the manner in which 'advise' is given that annoys people. I put a photo of my lad on recently asking about his condition, of course I fully expected some 'OMG he's obese' because he's a heavy weight cob and therefore to some eyes he is a big fat fatty...but in the main the comments were very nice and encouraging and helped satisfy my mind that I was feeding him correctly (cos come on we all doubt ourselves sometimes when it comes to caring for our loved ones don't we?).

I think sometimes before replying people should read the thread more, 10 people saying the same thing isn't really constructive it's bordering on sheep mentality and therefore to be avoided but if someone is stupid enough to post pictures and not expect some form of negative as well as positive then I'm afraid they haven't grasped the whole 'forum' mentality.
 
So long as someone isn't actually nasty, what's wrong with blunt or 'advice' type comments? I don't post pics/vids at the moment as there's nothing I feel particularly proud of, and if I post 'work in progress' pics, then people are going to tell me what I already know, which is pointless lol! If I didn't have an instructor I probably would, to get more ideas of where we might be going wrong etc, and I probably will post when I think the TB is ready for stressage to see what you all think before I spend the ££ on entry fees. I'd hate everyone to go 'she looks lovely' then get 45% because actually she didn't and there were glaring issues I hadn't noticed - would much rather get honest opinions!!!!!
 
One thing this place consistently shows is that many people have NO idea about how to communicate with other people. Constructive criticism can be useful and help people - shredding someone is likely to have the complete opposite effect and just lead to them ignoring whatever they are being told.

For example - recent comments about a clip. One person slated it completely (and pointlessly IMO) - another person suggested ways to do it better next time. Neither of those were gushing 'You're so amazing and your pony-wony is so cute, love hugs cupcakes with sprinkles' type posts, but one, I would suggest, was infinitely more helpful and likely to be listened to than the other...:rolleyes:
 
I think its about how you word it isnt it, as everyone else has said. No one minds constructive criticism but unortunatly some people take it as an opporunity to slate others without knowing the full story.
Ive recently put a thread up and felt like the way someone answered me sounded like they were making out i didnt know what I was doing when in fact Ive previously done all of what they have suggested, and more. Its just annoying when some people treat you like a simpleton x
 
Unfortunately you are never going to agree with all the people that post with opinions about your animal.

Also, some people are obviously in a hurry when they comment or cannot be bothered to "fluff up" their posts to make them sound nicer and friendlier.

Also, you are never ever going to get the full meaning of what people are getting at when they post as you cannot see their facial expressions - simple really and very very common in companies that use email rather than face to face to communicate.

In a nutshell - don't be so bloody sensitive!! - directed at all not OP!!
 
Opinions are like an a*sehole, everyone has one.....

I think negative commenting is fine. As long as it's constructive. I don't think it's fair for anyone to comment on a thread just saying 'you're doing it all wrong' and not offer any advice. If you think someone is doing something wrong or poorly, offer a way for them to improve.

However, a lot of people just slate each other on here and hide behind their online profile. I truly doubt, some of the stuff said on here, would ever be said face to face.
 
benson21 said:
I think if you put a post up you should expect good and bad comments, and receive them gracefully. I cant see the point of putting up a post asking 'do you think I should of done this' or ' is what I am doing ok' and then get stroppy when someone says no!
Click to expand...

Totally agree with this, it does annoy me when folks get stroppy because their not being told what they want to hear, it's very childish. If you can't take the heat.....

That said, I tend not to comment if I don't have something nice to say (I'm not brave enough!), but at the same time I don't say anything I don't mean, e.g, I wouldn't say someone's riding was fab if I thought it was awful.
 
If its negative and constructive then go ahead, if you have gone out of your way to be plain horrible then dont bother. And check the history before typing. Kokopelli is a good example, the amount of people she has had commenting on her lovely man about his condition when it has already been discussed and advice given and there is a clear improvement from the original post.
 
If you were posting in a thread and wondered why no one was commenting on what was ovbious to you, would you not go back and check what has already been said in the op's previous threads?
 
Nikkimariet I am stealing your first sentence!!

I think that both the positive and negative should be mentioned, however not everybody appears to read the whole thread before posting, and some people are just downright nasty with their comments. It's one thing to say "well your horse looks nice but perhaps he could do with losing a few kgs" rather than "OMG your horse is so fat you're going to give him lami, if you can't feed him properly then you shouldn't have him" etc.
 
I have also found that sometimes people are over nice to other users if they happen to be young, appear delicate or a "popular" poster, this IMO is just as worrying as the people that are a little too blunt and to the point!
 
I think there will always be people who will make nasty comments because it is anonymous. But that is different from honest opinions.

I have experienced both about Fany. I posted just after we got whether she was too fat, I thought she was but because she is my first draft horse, I just wanted advice really and got some excellent advice and it was honest.eg yes she is too fat, this is what you should do. This was not oh she is fine, that is useless. It was this is what is wrong, this is what to do type of comment.

However, I also posted about breeding her in the breeding part of the forum. Fany is an extremely well bred Ardennes (Trait Ardennais) with sire, g-sire, dam and g-dam all champions, and is an excellent example of her breed. She has won quite a lot in Belgium herself.

However she is a draft horse, not a posh WB (got one of those as well) an Arab, a TB or a CB. I had some really nasty comments eg why would I want to breed from her? Because she is the most fantastic mare, with good confo and an excellent temperament and a good competition record. But I ended up with loads of nasty PMs. Not from everyone but there were a couple of people.

So it all depends on what the negative comments are about, are they just spiteful or are they helpful? That is what the question should be.

FDC
 
Last edited:
china said:
If you were posting in a thread and wondered why no one was commenting on what was ovbious to you, would you not go back and check what has already been said in the op's previous threads?
Click to expand...
I might, but a lot of people have limited internet access and/or slow connection so don't have the time to do that. If a person is posting about horsey health issue and then posts a photo of the animal looking underweight, then I don't think it is unreasonable for a forum user to mention it, in case the two were linked.

I know if I was posting a similar photo I would probably add alongside something like "Excuse his condition, he was underweight when we bought him and are working hard to build him up" just so people are aware.
 
Sanolly said:
"well your horse looks nice but perhaps he could do with losing a few kgs"
Click to expand...

I misread this as "well your horse looks nice but perhaps you could do with losing a few kgs"... lol...

I agree, there's a big difference between constructive criticism and just being cruel. There's also a difference between commenting when criticisim has been asked for, or when it's something actually "bad", but when someone's posted a photo of their horse jumping/competing/whatever, I find it odd for people to criticise something trivial like it's clip or their choice of colour scheme... Yes if it's grossly out of condition, do criticise, but I've yet to hear of a horse dying from clashing colours ;)

Doesn't happen often, just occasionally you wonder what motivates comments like these...
 
Allover said:
I have also found that sometimes people are over nice to other users if they happen to be young, appear delicate or a "popular" poster, this IMO is just as worrying as the people that are a little too blunt and to the point!
Click to expand...

This is what I was getting at in my post, I think there are folks who say things they don't mean just to be nice (either that or they don't have a clue!)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top