Slightly scared now...

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caitlin95uk

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Now im only 14, so i do take alot of advice from all of you, as you are older and most likely more experienced, but whats really started to scare me, is the comments you put on bsjashowjumpers posts, im seriously scared of posting something, in case i get shot down.
now please dont take this as an offence and somewhere to argue,
but please just imagine what would happen if all of you were shouting at a 15 year old stranger in the middle of a street?
Tbh im scared now that any of my riding will be criticised :( i think young people on here get treated differently.. as if they shouldnt be the ones giving it, only recieving it...
now please dont make this into a 16 page + argument about how she is wrong or how bad she is treating her horse etc, but ive noticed you have all become a bit judgemental, and i know you could say im going with what i know.. and i do respect that you do worry for the horse, but like someone said, we are teenagers we are learning, we can't just magically be amazing :( unfortunately.. we do have to try and we have to learn and thats by getting on a horse and doing it.. you don't know how the horse reacts to your advice? maybe shes trying but its getting no where... but please dont shoot me down for this :(
 
I shouldn't worry at all. Age doesn't come into it, only the ability to try and listen to the answers given to any questions you would like to ask - otherwise there isn't so much point in asking them!!
 
I think the comments on the other teenagers posts are largely due to frustration on the side of posters who have spent time and consideration giving advice to have it thrown back at them.

I honestly think that if you ask for advice then you either take it or leave it, but don't continue posting about continuing problems that people have given possible solutions to without at least trying the advice or saying "thanks but no thanks," with a good/plausible reason why it wouldn't work for you. That hasn't been the case and it is as if BSJAshowjumper is walking around with her fingers in her ears while humming loudly, while still complaining of issues which has got people slightly wound up and probably even more critical of her.

I do believe that anyone genuinely wanting advice will be given it, and learning to accept criticism is all part of growing up I'm afraid, but I don't think that anyone who is truly wanting the best for their horse would receive a bad reception, not from what I've seen anyway.
 
There was a young poster on here a few months ago who asked for advice and took it on board in a mature and honest way. She was helped and advised and I think is doing very well with her mare as a result of her hard work and listening to advice.
 
I think people moan about BSJAwhateversheis because she's a bit of a muppet, not because she's young.... so you'll be fine. :D
 
In short...
I am a teenager.
I have asked for advice.
I have been given advice.
I took it on.
I improved!

Simple as.
If BSJAshowjumper asks for advice on here, she might very well get it.:eek: Whether she chooses or not to use it is her perogative, but posting repeatedly with the same questions aren't helping her or her mare.
 
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BSJA...123 doesn't get criticised for asking for advice, but for not taking it, then asking the same thing again.

If you want to ask something, go ahead, but please don't then ask it again having ignored all the responses first time round!
 
I tink if you are 16 ot 60 (my age) asking for advice and ignoring it is frustating to say the least. People in general become defensive as the advice they are given is not something they have not thought of or themselves.

I have found good advice (in the main) on here. No one knows everything about or to do with horses. Once you except that fact one can only learn more. Keep an open mind at all times.

Jane
 
agree with above
im a 43 year old novice
now supposign i came here one day and showed a picture of my horse tacked up to the hilt with a cruel strogn bit on - asking why he was bucking .
people would say remove that bit - give advice on alternatives.
i return a week later with a video showing my riding in same tack, same nasty bit and asking for advice again!!!
Think people would be pretty peeved tbh and rightly so
Peopel here are wonderful and helpful - but noone likes to have their good and correct advice completeley ignored xxx
 
''People are very open-minded about new things - as long as they're exactly like the old ones.”

Fits perfectly :)

Same as if you do as you've always done,you'll always get what you've already got.
 
See how there are sets in school? I think you, the OP, are in a good set because you sound mature and able to take on board advice.

I have refrained from commenting in a derogatory way about the other teenager because if people give advice, she might come back for more and improve. If older people are just foul, then she may well never return and continue to wonder what she is doing wrong.

If people get annoyed at a poster, use the ignore button. Simple.
 
Never be scared, as others have said, its how you deal with the advice that matters.

You also said you're worried people will critisize (sp) your riding. Of course they will, as will people who are on your yard, people in the street etc etc, anyone in any walk of life has an opinion if they are in the same 'world' as you ie runners critisize other runners technique, etc etc. I can't look at another horse person without analyzing what they are doing.

Critisism is good, as long as you take it constructively, not personally, and with a pinch of salt!!!!

I never knew my spelling was so lacking lol!!!!
 
Don't be scared to ask for advise, there are MANY knowledgable people on here who are more than willing to help.....aslong as you listen to the advice and take it on board :) The only reason people get aggrivated by BSJAshowjumper123 is because she asks for advice continually and ignores the answers she is given in almost a "troll like" way.

It's not an age thing is a well why give advice if it's not going to be taken onboard. :D


If you are worried about people criticising your riding ask them not to and if you do get any negative comments just simply ignore them :) as mentioned above people will ALWAYS have their own remarks to your riding (esp at large yards and shows etc) but just take it all with a pinch of salt, smile, and move on :D
 
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cinammontoast said:
See how there are sets in school? I think you, the OP, are in a good set because you sound mature and able to take on board advice.
.
Click to expand...

aha! why thankyou, lol, i am actually top set and i can take criticism better than others tbh but as a teenager, i fight it in my head and say oh what do they know but i still take it on board, but i could see how some people could get irritated as if to say but you dont know my horse, but then again, why ask for advice when you dont take it on board.
I think i was just sticking up for her because i could imagine myself in that situation, i hadn't realised her whole history! :D /
and don't worry i will ask for advice! as you are a lot more helpful then others at my yard! :D
 
Ha, there we go, G&T type, always inquiring but able to see and understand points of view not her own-direct from the National Curriculum.

OMG, I'm so sad, I NEED the holidays to come now!
 
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