someone cheer me up :-(

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staceyn

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So the OH lost his job again yesterday in the past two years has been made redundant 4times . All my spare money is going on his bills all the time getting fed up. Everyone seems to be giving of grief about helping him with his bills but what can I do I have no choice ?, the horses don't love me anymore and are being off with me my yearling has started biting me again and started to get very coltish which I am very firm with but just want him gelded so its done with , can't geld him because there is only one ball at the moment. Also decided to get feather mites yay. I have started my illness management course and she keeps shouting at me sayin I should avoid any stress how can I lol ! Argh. Just fed up with everyone relaying on me why do I have to be a nice person and I can't say no when helping anyone. I just saved up for a new barn and the OH needs the money to pay bills . I have to find him a new job which is impossible as he is only good with grafting and there is nothing about his credit history is terrible so can't buy a house any time soon so another thing I have to sort. Oh god give me strength. Someone cheer me up sorry for the rant :-(
 
Awww sounds a nightmare! X

Can he at least help you with the horse hard graft in the mean time? X I hope he appreciates you helping him out x

You say that you have to find him a job? Why can't he find his own job? x Maybe help him get a good CV together and send him off to timber/building companies etc to drop them off x

Can he cut back on bills? Stop contract phone and have a pay as you go one? Sell his car and get a cheaper one, cheaper one to run etc?

I dont think you should have to be short, especially if you have to spend your saved money, he needs to cut back in every way possible first?

Is he good at making stuff? Could he make stuff and sell? x Tack boxes are a good money maker by me at the moment x

Hope it doesnt strain your relationship too much xx
 
Sounds to me like your OH is the problem here. He needs to be a lot more supportive of you and if this involves turning into a housewife and doing the chores, shopping, cleaning, cooking, horses than so be it - at least it would be something you don't have to worry about!
 
i dont know if you are married or not but be careful that if you are giving him money and then you split up, will you get the money back? Don't let him cripple you x You work hard for your needs and if he's helped you out before then thats fair enough but dont let him live off you x

You dont sound very happy with him as it is though? X
 
you sound very stressed, wish I could help :(

Maybe have a chat with OH, write down all the things he/you have to pay for- the decide what you really need and what you can cut back on- e.g. mobile phone- get pay as you go or cheaper contract, free view tv instead of sky, have a budget for food etc.

Get him to help you out with the housework and horses etc, help him with his CV- Put everything on it!!! from when he was 13- even if he worked somewhere for 2 days! seriously sounds ridiculous but it helps!

Send him off to give his cv in to every shop you can think of- a job is a job and beggers cant be choosers. asda, tesco, cafe's etc etc etc. you have to hassle these places. get him to email his cv every day if he has to!- ring them every week and ask if there are any jobs going.

and finally take a day off, put your feet up and eat lots of chocolate :)
 
Maybe you could just find the numbers of a few agencies and get him to book registrations with them, should help him get thinking and a bit more proactive. I believe they have agencies for labouring etc...

Otherwise be careful not to take on more than you have to, some men seem to slip into being mothered a bit too easily! Make sure you get him to help with your stuff too, it will at least give him something to do so he can feel useful and be motivated to get a new job so he can get paid!

Otherwise, crap situation for you! Helping someone pay the odd bill for a couple of months is one thing and they'd do the same for you, but having them financially dependant on you is quite another.
 
Go on give us a kiss and I will love you
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Hope it made you smile:):)
 
Whilst jobs in the corporate market are short, there are always jobs going mucking out whether it be on a racing yard or other, believe it or not but employment market in horse racing is short, not enough people to employ. I love mucking out every box is different, just a suggestion.

Get hold of creditors and ask if you can pay the absolute minimum, as long as you are paying and start to reduce the usage things will be okay.
 
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