Something to make you laugh part 2

unicornleather

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30 August 2008
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Here's the second lot, one more to go, advice don't read this with a full bladder!
Enjoy


Actual writings on hospital charts

1. The patient refused autopsy.

2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

4. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only

a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

5. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was

very hot in bed last night.

6. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

7. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it

disappeared.

8. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be

depressed.

9. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

10. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.

11. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but

forgetful.

12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

13. She is numb from her toes down.

14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

15. The skin was moist and dry.

16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until

she got a divorce.

20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical

therapy.

21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized

Oz :)
 
Yes Sanolly, I was going to space no 1 out a bit but as there was so many I thought it would take up TOO much space or you'd all be asleep before you got to the end!!
Oz :)
 
I have seen this before but it is just as funny second time round. Thank you I have now cried and laughed in 5 minutes due to this forum:eek:
 
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