Stress, bad moods and horses

[Peglo]

My cat went missing again yesterday and I was very stressed. (she rocked up at 2 in the morning thankfully) My friend asked if she could get some pictures with Tali in her wedding dress and I of course wanted to be part of this. My friend was the one who got me into horses but she’s not in the position to have horses atm so I wanted her to have her wedding pictures. But I didn’t feel I could ride Tali with my cat stresses so I walked her down to the beach to meet them and get pictures taken and it was so lovely.



I have quite a few flaws but one I hate about myself most is my bad moods. I get so easily frustrated and have zero patience. These traits can come out when I’m stressed as well. When I feel like this all I want is to get home to my OH, cats and horses but at the same time they will all be the first I snap at (verbally only!! And I apologise profoundly and take myself away to brood alone until it passes.) and so when I’m in these moods I have as little contact with my horses as I can so that I don’t get frustrated with them and I won’t ride unless I’m feeling level headed again.



I know some people go to the stables when they feel stressed or in a bad mood and a nice hack out is the thing that sorts them out.



So do horses help your mood or do you need your own space to sort yourself out?

Really hoping I’m not the only grumpy witch here

 

[stangs]

Fellow stressy snappy soul here

As I don't own my own, I've always been limited in what days I can go to the yard, so have never been able to go to the yard just to feel better.

Back in the day, it did help to go to the yard. Not just the riding, but being around the horses and good friends. Most of the time, it felt like a second home, but unfortunately things happened and I can no longer go there.

Since said things, I can only think of a couple occasions where my mood got better from going to the stables. Horses tend to exasperate my issues more than improve them. It's a combination of internalising issues in a schooling session as reflective of me letting the horse down or worrying that there's a pain-related issue causing it (I don't get frustrated with the horse, but my frustration with myself grows more intense) + worrying that I'm affecting the horses unconsciously with my poor mood + most of the horses I've hacked on recently being spooky / the hack itself involving too stressful roadwork for my liking, so couldn't relax hacking either + not getting along with people at the yard, or just feeling very awkward being there.

TDLR; if I go to the yard stressed, I just become depressed. Jury's still out for whether that's an improvement or not.

 

[planete]

If I have a totally reliable horse who needs no prompting to do the right thing then being with him is a way to decompress. If the horse needs a lot of input from me I will give him a day off if I am not feeling right, physically or mentally. If I am just sad about something then being around horses does help. But for me being around horses does not involve being around other people. If it did I certainly would not find it helpful.

 

[Sossigpoker]

When I was a bit younger I stayed away from my horse if I was in a shitty mood but now that I'm better in control of my emotions and a bit older , my horse is my saviour on my bad days.

 

[spotty_pony]

My older boy helps me feel better if I am feeling down, but I wouldn’t go out riding on the Friesian when feeling like rubbish - I need my wits about me and it’s not fair when I’m not in the right frame of mind.

 

[AntiPuck]

My horse is young and new to me, so she is definitely more of a stressor than a calmer at the moment, and I have decided not to go see her a couple of times when I was in a bad mood, as I don't feel I'd have been able to stuff it down and be neutral with her.

Usually, though, horses are calming for me, and going for a walk in-hand or a hack with one sorts my mood right out.

 

[SpotsandBays]

Sounds familiar!
I tend not to go horsing if I’m in a bad mood. I’ll make sure they have what they need and what not but I won’t ride usually.
I’m finding Yoga really helpful for my stress and moods though.

 

[Cob Life]

I find they really help my bad moods! They’re both very sensitive especially them mare, and if I am not 100% focused on them one likes to put in random sharp spooks and the other will argue with me and we just go round in circles arguing.

they’ve forced me to learn to leave stuff outside of the yard

 

[Bernster]

Same for me, they generally help my mood. You’ve got to focus and be in the moment around horses, so it’s a good way for me to forget any work hassles and concentrate on something else which seems to use a different part of my brain. I do get frustrated at times, usually about my rubbish riding, but even that passes.

 

[ihatework]

I never schooled if I was in a stressed mood. If the weather was nice I’d hack on a long rein and go for a canter, that would cheer me up. If the weather was manky I just wouldn’t ride.

A lot of people seem oblivious to how our moods can impact our riding and horses.

 

[Widgeon]

I don't ride alone if I'm grumpy or stressed. I usually just bring him in and give him a good groom if I have time. That tends to make me feel better. However if there's someone to hack out with I'll do that. It helps that I like everybody on our yard.

 

[Roasted Chestnuts]

When I feel like that I don’t ride. I will go up and spend time and simmer down but I don’t ride.

I will muck out, groom, fill haynets, do yard chores, poo pick, trim feet, basically anything and everything but ride. I don’t think its fair to get into the saddle in a volatile mood as yes it could calm you down however the horse could be having a sense of humour day that could set you off when normally it wouldn’t bother you.

I have gotten on when anxious but never when snappy or feeling flashes of angry frustration or temper