struggling to ride, need advice/kick up the bum...

[D66]

Can you try to find another mum with small child to share riding. Then one of you can look after the children while the other rides.

 

[mcnaughty]

I think you have several options here - will list them!

a. Sell pony - it is an option and quite frankly an easy to hack pony costs the same as your little blighter to keep!
b. Send pony away to be schooled - can be expensive but would probably solve the issue.
c. Get an instructor to come with you on a hack on foot on a long lunge leadrein.
d. Get really angry and beat the little +++++ to a pulp! Now this would be my preferred option (not to a pulp that is a little harsh) but you do need to grow a pair and get really angry! He is taking the P and you need to tell him that this behaviour is NOT acceptable. You MUST however work on him going FORWARD as if you whack him and grab hold of the reins he will have no option but to do in the only other direction he has left and that is UP! Never ever do this! You must get him going forward if that means trotting fast then so be it!
e. Get capable teenager to take him out and show you that it can be done and then you could do option d. !!

I do feel for you but you really should get this issue sorted for your own and the pony's sake! Summer is coming and think of all those lovely hacks you will miss out on!

 

[stencilface]

Just a thought of one thing to try - have you tried making him go backwards when he naps? Sometimes if you do this it confuses them so much they become much easier to manage. So rein back, halt, then ask to walk forward. If he still refuses just keep going back! Need a quiet lane obviously, but it does work

 

[Annagain]

Everybody else has given you very good advice, but I wonder if it may be worth your while getting a sharer a day or two a week? That way pony would have more exercise to keep his weight down, you could have some help in the winter - with a day or two off to spend more time with your daughter you should feel less guilty about the time you spend with your horse - and if you find someone capable it might help his napping as well?

I would also make firm plans to ride with people at your yard, there's nothing better than a commitment to force you to ride. I appreciate you steal moments when it's quiet but maybe early on a saturday or sunday morning would be a good option. I get up early nearly every Sunday as it's the best time for my friend to ride. After school is taken up with ferrying them to swimming / cubs / brownies / tennis etc and her OH often works Saturdays so Sunday morning (well until 11!) is her time. I share her horse (as well having mine) so he gets exercised plenty during the week too.

 

[bex1984]

I do make him go backwards sometimes...it makes him Really Cross! It works for getting short distances (out of a gateway) but no further really.

Maybe I do need to think about a sharer or something - I don't think it helps that he's fat and unfit and thinks he's in semi retirement!

Thanks so much everyone for all your advice. Been to give him a cuddle this evening and ended up in tears because his feathers have broken off and he's got mud fever for the first time ever. Poor pony!

 

[Leo Walker]

I think if you can get a confident rider to hack him out a few times he will be fine Lots and lots and lots of cobs have a really good line in napping and offering threats to be REALLY NAUGHTY if you don't get off their case RIGHT NOW. Usually a smacked bottom later and they give it up as a bad idea and far too much like hard work :lol: I know I'm generalising massively there but if hes spot on in the school and "hacks out" in fields then hes fixable

 

[Smurf's Gran]

Thank you all for your help.

It's tough balancing work, child, horse, alongside the extra challenge of a stubborn pony and a bit of a loss of confidence.

He really is stubborn when napping - he'll stop, spin, go backwards into ditches, threaten to buck if smacked, paw the ground, and try to tank off home. I really do want to get an experienced rider to take him out and see how she gets on, hopefully that will happen soon. Maybe I do need to just take it a bit at a time - I think I'm probably seeing it as all or nothing at the moment.

Doing some other stuff - games etc sounds like a good plan, we need to start having fun again. At our old yard we had fields to gallop about in and he'd do that alone, but we don't have anywhere to do that where we are now.

He really is a lovely pony, it's such a shame hacking aalone is such a big issue for him. I wish I knew why - I'm never sure if he's genuinely lacking in confidence or just playing me up!

Our pony went through a napping phase, when they stop moving forwards what can work is circle them very quickly and very very tightly (their head just about touching your knee). You will still be pushing them onwards (if not forwards) so winning one battle, plus the fact that once you have done about two very tight circles you will have got them moving again and thus broken the backwards thinking mode and distracted them sufficiently from napping that they are very likely to move forwards again. You do need to be very assertive though and once you are facing forwards again you need to be ready to ride on very strongly.

Also its useful to use in the short term to quickly cure a problem but not great for legs so not good as a long term strategy - it also works to prevent rearing if you can use it quickly enough.

This technique is a bit "last resort" but can really turn things around for you if you are stuck. I think I would try the going with a friend on a bike for a while and if that doesn't work then other tougher methods such as the above might