Thinking of giving up horses.

tubby1

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4 August 2010
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Looking for some opinions. We currently have 3 horses on DIY livery. My WB and my daughters 2 ponies. We have had a particularly bad year this year with 2 of them requiring very expensive surgery and being on prolonged box rest. At the same time we have lost our business and nearly lost our home. To say the least it has been stressful. Now we are getting back on track I am looking to start a college course and my OH is working. I have always been a stay at home mum so looking after the ponies hasn't been a problem. Both horses are fit and able to be brought back into work. And this is my problem I have absolute no enthusiasm for riding or doing anything with my girl. Doing the horses has become a chore and being on a yard with limited turn out means we are mucking out twice a day most days. I think the obvious solution is to give back one of my daughters ponies he is on loan and she is getting too big for him. I'm also thinking of selling my girl in the New year. I really want a but if time to myself and we are struggling financially to keep the 3 . I can always pop on my daughters pony if I miss it and at the rate age is growing we would be able to share in a year or so. I don't mean to sound heartless as I adore the horses and the thought of them going breaks my heart but they are just so time consuming and expensive. Has anyone else felt like this and given up. I would still get pony time just as a horsey mummy. Sorry for long post but decisions need to be made.
 

reddie

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I think you have already answered your own question. Just don't feel guilty about it. As you say, you will still have your horsey fix, and horses are there to enjoyed , not a chore. You can always go back to it, I did after 18 years!
 
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Would you consider lwvtb for the wb? Then if you miss her, you can get her back. You do sound like you want some breathing space, so send back the pony and see if you could get a sharer or a loaner for a bit. If you've made up your mind, however, then sell the wb.
 

PorkChop

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You are certainly not being heartless - you have had a rough year, I hope 2016 is tons better for you :)

Horses are an expensive and time consuming hobby, you have got to love it to do it. If I was feeling the way you do then I would definitely sell two or the whole lot depending on how keen your daughters are.

There is no point you being frazzled and grumpy, not productive at all. Like you say, in a very short period of time your daughters will need something bigger that would be perfect for sharing :)
 

Orca

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I gave up for a long time and now share one with my children. It will never be the same as having my own but I honestly couldn't manage more than one properly (financial and time constraints). I firmly believe that having horses should be enjoyable and if it no longer is to you, for whatever reason, then you are right to make any adjustment necessary.
 

Equi

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Downsizing sounds like a good compromise to me. You will find you have more enthusiasm for the one pony when you have the time to!
 

mytwofriends

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What a downer of a year for you. OP. Here's to a cheerier 2016!

I've been on the brink a few times this year too. Horse overload in my case. I only have two, but I worked with them too (quit job just recently, as I'd had enough.) I found myself stretched so thin time wise, I started to almost resent them.

Neither of mine were rideable this year, one being retired and one injured - plus they're in two different places. I just lost all enthusiasm, although I love them both to pieces.

Injured one is now on the mend, so that, plus quitting the job, has kick-started me a bit.

So, OP, do whatever you think is best, and think of yourself Sending the pony back is a start, and either selling or loaning out your WB will help lighten your load too. That bit of breathing space will enable you to get back on track.

Whatever you decide, all the very best of luck!
 

rachk89

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Yeah I agree with mytwofriends. Give back the one on loan it's kind of useless now if your daughter is too big for it. I would maybe loan your mare first before selling so you can see how much you miss her. I kind of think you maybe would regret selling her especially when your daughter gets bigger and you could go on hacks together (assuming she is still young).

It is a horrible year you have had though so I can understand if you want to draw a line and get rid of them. Horses are expensive.
 

JillA

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I've been there a few times over the years, but I know that within a few weeks I would be climbing walls, I'd be missing them so badly. And hanging round others' horses just isn't the same. Can you somehow manage a respite - put them on loan, turn them away and just feed and check them, anything to enable you to have a bit of a rest from the drudgery?
 

ktj1891

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I think a lot of people feel like this and this time of year. However, in your position I think something needs to change. I would send back one of the ponies as you have said he is getting too small anyways. Wait until the new year and if you want to sell yours do that. Also to make it more enjoyable, less time and money consuming maybe look for a yard with winter turnout? I used to be on a yard with no winter turnout for years and it was so depressing for my horses and me. They are now out 24/7 and doing fantastic!
 

Goldenstar

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This the worse time of year to have a horse .
There's lots extra going on and it's easy to begin to resent the slog , I have loads of help looking after my five but despite this I get jaded this time of year.
Certainly send back the too small pony , and I think it's a good plan to sell your horse and work towards a mum and daughter share type situation .
 

laura_nash

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Doesn't sound like a great situation for anyone, including the horses if they are on limited turnout and you are struggling with time and motivation. Can you send the little one back and rough off the other two on grass livery somewhere for the winter? Give yourself the winter off to recover? If they've been on box rest they might appreciate a chance to be a horse for a bit too.
 

gnubee

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Might be worth pushing yourself through it until they are back in work. Having a horse you can do what you want on is much more fulfilling than having one on a strict and limited regime. Also, if you are loaning/ selling your chances of getting the right person/ price will be significantly improved.

Are you enjoying it when/ after you ride and just struggling for motivation ? If do I think a lot of us get that feeling that we would rather stay in bed than get up and do ponies in winter, particularly if we are having to get back into a routine of doing it, but the enjoyment gained during/ after the ride makes it all worth it. If you aren't even enjoying riding any more then it is time to loan out/ sell and reevaluate what you want to be doing.
 

julie111

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8 April 2010
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Sorry you have had such a pants year! If I was you I would send back the loan pony but I would hold on to your mare but loan her. This is the worst time of year to own horses, see how you feel once you're back on your feet and we have better weather. You said you could ride daughters pony but is riding out together something you used to enjoy? I hope 2016 is a better one!
 

Frenchmade

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13 October 2015
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Could you get someone to share, rather than loan? That way some of the work is passed to someone else and you can arrange whatever part share you like. This is a big decision to make and is best made when you're not feeling under so much pressure, although I fully understand that having the horses is part of that pressure. Im hesitating to suggest you part with your mare but totally agree about sending the loan pony back. that will reduce the workload and expense and then if someone shares your other horse you have even less work, and more money. After a terrible year of illness, injury and financial difficulty, I sold my horse and totally got out of horses. It was, for a year, a huge relief. But I've regretted it ever since, even though he wasn't the right horse for me. I'd def say that if you decide to part with her, keep all your tack an equipment! That can cost more than a horse when you want to start again. Good luck and I hope 2016 is a wonderful year for you and your family.
 

Crugeran Celt

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You shouldn't feel guilty as horses are hard work and if you are not enjoying it then the hard work is for nothing. As someone has suggested, could you put your horse on loan and see how you feel next year when things are more settled? You will find only having one instead of three so much easier and will give you time to think which direction you want to go.
 
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