Thinking of selling... Just a phase? & what's he worth?

[Kub]

Hey peeps, bit of a sad one but I feel I need to get it off my chest, so if you feel like being an agony aunt, please read on.

I have had Harry for just over 2 years now and for most of that time, I have adored having him. The early mornings, the ripped rugs, the muddy boots have all been worth it and I've loved watching him grow from a bolshy little youngster to the handsome beast he's turning into. Problem is, for the last few months, I've just not been feeling like that...

I think if you have horses, you have to completely love it. It takes up so much of your time and money, it's just not worth it unless it makes you happy. But recently, having Harry has felt like a chore. He was backed almost 3 months ago and he's doing so well, but I'm just not feeling it anymore

It doesn't help that I'm having a load of doubts about my life at the moment and it's all getting me down *sigh* but Harry is just such a good boy, he's so easy to do and so easy to handle and I think he will go far in the right hands, I'm just not sure it's my hands he should be in.

Has anyone else felt like this? What did you do?

The other bit is if I did decide to sell him, what would he be worth? Here's a bit about him.

He's a rising 4 traditional heavy weight cob, standing about 14.3H but may make 15H+ yet. He's got loads of mane, feather and tail and he's coloured, mixture of brown, black & white, classified as Bay Tobiano on his passport (registered with CHAPS).
He's well marked and has good confirmation, did in hand showing last year and was placed in every class.
We haven't got out this year but there's a couple of shows coming up so we'll see how we do.
He's just been backed (April) and is doing so well. Already hacking out on his own, on his way to being boomproof and no major issues so far. We had a bit of napping a couple weeks after he came home but it was sorted in 3 days.
He's a very quick learner and only needs to be told things a couple of times before they stick. He has a brilliant tempremant, very easy to catch and load, pick out feet, will stand for hours being washed and groomed and generally fussed over for shows. Quite happy to live out 24/7, with others or on his own. He's a good doer and hardy horse, even in winter the heaviest rug he wore was a 180g MW rug and he was lovely and toasty.
He's never kicked out or reared with me, can be handled by anyone (young girls get him from the field with no issues) and is generally a lovely boy to be around.

Hope that's a good description, if you think you can get an idea of what he's worth from that, I'd be interested in opinions.

This is him from last week (needs a scrub)

This is one from a show last year

If you got this far, thank you! Hot choc and choccy biscuits for all.

 

[Honey08]

I bet that you'd miss him if you did sell him. You've just got to the fun, riding part... You don't have to do too much with himat that age, just keep him ticking over and let him grow up. You could do shows on him (ridden) now and again.

However, if your heart is really not in it, then sell him. You can always buy something else later on. No idea what he's worth - do some research into online ads... He would be worth more with some experience under his belt.

 

[team barney]

As you are unsure of what to do, perhaps you could loan him/share him for a season and then see how you feel.

Price wise I'd say around £1500-£2000

 

[Lila]

I'v felt like this before, put my girl on loan and missed her every bit of the time. I looked for every chance to see her and ended up having her back.

Why not put him on loan and see how you feel xx

 

[Horses24-7]

Do you have lessons with him? I really feel these motivate me? X

 

[Miss L Toe]

I feel a bit like this at the moment, boy is turned out and I am looking for a share loan, I have advertised him for sale , at price more than most people would pay!
I too am depressed at the moment, due to all sorts of things going awry.

 

[Kenzo]

It's probably just a phase if your feeling down about other things in your life.

I can't see the photos but it sounds like you have a lovely friend and lovely cob there, ask yourself what will be achieved by selling him apart from freeing up some spare time and having some spare cash? sounds like your have a bit of low self-esteem going on there, but you might feel differently tommorrow, next week, next month.

Maybe you just need a break to get our head together a bit, in which case bob him on loan or find a sharer, you may enjoy sharing as you'll have the support and social side of it, just remember once you have sold them, there's no turning back and it seems a shame for you part with him when you have both got this far.

Have some lessons if you don't feel you can quite do him justice, but if he hacks out, you can take him to shows and he's coming on well like you say then just enjoy him for what he is now, you should try to think about the positives.

Hope your feeling better soon, we all get fed up at times, wouldn't be human if we didn't.

 

[Shellby27]

He is a gorgeous horse and you look really good together. I think everyone has doubts about horses sometimes. You won't realise how "horsey" you are until you have sold him. I've always had them and couldn't be without them. If you are finding things hard at the mo, advertise for someone to loan/share him as suggested above. Not everyone can afford to own a horse and I am sure there will be many offers to share Harry.

Maybe to help with motivation, try something new with Harry. Lessons, hacking in new places, western, driving, a horsey holiday??? I know he might be a bit young to do all these things, but it's something you could look forward to.

Or maybe you just need a break. Why not let him and you have a couple of weeks off. It won't do either of you any harm and you can get your head straight about selling him or not.

 

[EmmaR]

I went through this stage had 2 horses and all of a sudden just didnt have the motivation anymore, my poor dad was mucking them out and doing them most of the time and i felt it wasnt fair in the end they deserved the best possible home and not me doing things half heartedly.
Well lets just say i sold them both and within around 2 months i had bought one of them back (i had previously had him for 8 years so was my baby!) and bought another one lol.

Didnt last very long missed it to much! and during those 2 months i was still riding a friends!
So think long and hard about it if i couldnt of bought back my boy i would have been totally gutted!
Perhaps loan him out for a bit that way if you are missing it you can just have him back.

 

[Vixen Van Debz]

I lose my horsie mojo sometimes. I still love them, but the motivation kinds of goes and I don't feel like riding: I'd rather just work on the ground and watch them. I never stop plugging at it though as I know lack of interest is not a horsey issue, it's just a symptom of my moods being low. Plus, my RI can tell this a mile off and knows how I'm motivated by a challenge, and although it might take a couple of lessons, gets my fighting spirit back.

The fact that you love Harry enough to ask if you're the best person for him makes me think that yes, you are right. You certainly have his best interests in mind. However, if you think it's best someone else has him, then why not pay someone else to bring him on, or loan him out to someone skilled? That way you avoid your personal doubt, and I bet you'd miss him like the dickens. If you didn't however, then you'd have a very desirable horse to sell.

I hope that things sort themselves out for you in every possible way soon 80)

 

[Kub]

Thank you peeps, I really appreciate your comments. Glad to see I'm not the only one who has these doubts. I think a whole mixture of things is causing me to doubt everything in my life at the moment and unfortunately Harry is getting caught up in that too.

The idea of lessons is good, I'm hoping to get something sorted in the next few weeks so fingers crossed I can start to feel like we're making progress again. A lovely lady at my yard has offered to take me to some shows now as well (she spoke to me about it last night having no idea how I was feeling about Harry and I was really touched by her generosity, offering to rearrange holidays and everything!) so I guess I better get looking at the schedules.

Sharing is also a good suggestion, though with him being a youngster, I think I'd need to make sure it's someone who has an idea of what they are doing. He's such a lovely boy that I wouldn't want to ruin him in any way, so maybe getting someone in would be better.

I think you're all right in that I should give it some time, things just really started getting to me yesterday, you know how it is.

Thank you all once again, I knew the HHOers would make me see the bigger picture. *BIG HUGS* to all

 

[Splish & Masons mum]

blimey Kub, you nearly gave me a heart attack!
I've been following Harry's progress and was only wondering yesterday about how you were getting on!
After reading your post I was about to pop round with £1500 (as suggested earlier) and a trailer and get him!
I paid much more for Mason as a 4 year old who'd done about as much!
Stick with him if you can, he's a stunning boy!

 

[Kub]

Awww thanks Splish, sorry to give you a fright! Should it ever come to that point, I'll give you first refusal lol. Maybe we'll have some progress to report in the coming months if we get to some shows and things, I think I need to take it day by day at the moment and see what happens with everything else in my life before making any rash decisions over Harry.

I love the fuzz ball to bits really

 

[KittyJay]

where in somerset are you?

 

[china]

where in somerset are you. i may know of someone interested in a share.
i get this sometimes! i give myself a virtual kick up the bottom and tell myself that im a horsey gal and i couldnt live without them!

get out and do some fun stuff. it makes all the hard work worth while!

 

[canteron]

He looks rather lovely and as you say he is only a baby. Why not plan to ride him until say September and then find a way to give him (and you) the Winter off. He is so young it really wont do him any harm and might give reflection on everything you have done.

Then next year, you will know whether you have really missed it - or whether its time to get him fit and find a new home. As a 5yo, he will probably start to attract a whole new market and you might be more likely to find the 'forever' home I think he deserves?

Or/and just take a couple of weeks off now. I do that from time to time when life is crowding up and it doesn't seem to do any of us any harm.

 

[Kub]

I'm in Street and Harry's kept in Butleigh, about 5 minute drive from me.

I think I'm going to try and find some shows to get out to, I loved doing the last year and hopefully they'll reignite my passion again. Admittedly, the amount of scrubbing it's going to take to get him show isn't quite so appealing but it's usually worth it in the end.

Canterton - good idea about the winter off, didn't even think about doing that. Will see how things go in the next couple of months and go from there.

I'm feeling a bit better about the whole thing today after my riding lesson yesterday. I haven't had a lesson for a while due to other committments but yesterday reminded how much I do love riding and how much I really want to get to the point where I can go jumping with Hazzer and teach him a bit of everything. It was also nice to get some good comments about how my riding has come on, nice confidence booster

Thanks again peeps, think I was at a really low point when I posted this but I seem to be slowly climbing back up from it, and I reckon it's going to be easier with Harry by my side

 

[Luci07]

Pretty much everyone can get down a bit from time to time - and it also sounds like it was starting to get a little bored as well so very glad you are back to lessons and going out again.

Goals motivate me - lessons out, things to aim for otherwise time marches by and I have done nothing! Good luck!

 

[ester]

I think its pretty normal at times tbh! so definitely don't do anything rash! Cos then sometimes one fab day makes it all seem ok again. Took Frank up the quantocks yesterday and just kept going and it was just lovely!

I do find that for me these days I do what I want to do, my main issue is feeling like I have to ride him all the time to keep him fit enough. I do what I fancy with him, do make sure have a lesson every fortnight just to keep us going . I do tend to mix it up a bit, will do some dressage competing for a bit, then some jumping, trips to the beach. I know he is still a baby but I just make sure we do something a bit different every so often . I will occasionally go showing, but can only do the whole getting smart thing every so often!