To much to even ask?

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Once was lost

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I really need some advice and opinions on this so really need your help,

back ground is this, I used to be an experienced and very capable rider but a riding accident left me short of half an ankle bone, it was a very serious injury and was warned that I might never walk without a stick again, it took over a year of physio and splints but I did finally disprove that prediction however by that time I had lost my horses as they were on a complex combination of competing and producing loan that was fully funded by others as I couldn't afford to keep them myself, with me unable to look after them or ride them they went to somebody who could, the budding career I had in riding was over, riding at all was out of the question for at least 3 years after the fall so I had to get on with a life away from horses.
15 years later and my ankle is now stable and safe to be able to ride, pure chance had me meet and become friends with the head instructor and yard manager of the local riding school (I have moved 200 miles away from the area I lived in back then so had no horse contacts here) who when my youngest child started pre-school offered me riding lessons for my daughter in return for yard work, I loved every moment of it and just fell back into horses hook line and sinker. I have now started riding again myself but I am finding an hour a week in a group lesson just not enough, it's not enough to settle that need to ride feeling, not is it enough to develop my riding. The problem is I can't even afford to pay for my lesson, I get that through work, I can sometimes pick up an extra little ride in the school week but with winter coming on the horses will stop living out soon and there won't be time for mid week rides. I am at the moment working doing poo picking for a friend in my village to cover her parents being away for six weeks, she has a small yard where she has her horses and at the moment one livery. There are a few other people in the village who keep horses (most are children's ponies though) but I don't know them as well at this friend does, I am tied to my own small village because I don't have access to a car in the day.
So finally, to get to the question I am worried is too cheeky to even ask, I am thinking of asking my friend who I am working for in the village who has the small yard if she knows of anyone who would like/be willing to let me ride their horse sometimes maybe in exchange for yard work/mucking/poo picking. I am planning to get riders insurance for myself next week even if I don't ask this and I would make clear to my friend that she knows me well enough to know I would completely understand if it is not possible, most of the owners around here, including my friend are pretty serious about their dressage and you don't want to put just anybody on your horse, I was a good rider but I am currently blowing off the cobwebs and that takes time, with only one ride a week (and sometimes not even that, missed my ride today as horse I ride cast a shoe, no other suitable horse available, I am not a paying customer etc) it will take a long time to get me back to the level I was, I don't feel I will ever quite get back to that level, the ankle is still an issue at times and I have other health issues, so the long and the short of it is I completely understand all the reasons why people may not want me on their horses, but you don't get if you don't ask! I have never asked like this for rides in my life and it just seems like the height of cheek, so is it? Would you think less of a person who made a request like this of you? Should I just bite the bullet and ask?

If you have got this far, well done, goodies of your choice on the catering table over there ------->
 
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It'll do no harm to ask. You could also advertise that you are looking to ride in exchange of yard duties. I'd love a helping hand with my mucking out during winter!
 
elsbells said:
Not a good answer after re-reading your post.
Of course you should ask, if you don't ask, you won't get.
Click to expand...

Could I ask what was it that made you change your mind?

I know it is a big ask that is likely to be a no, letting somebody else ride your horse is a huge risk is several areas and I don't want my friend thinking I am out of order/trying to take advantage, I value the friendship.
 
Yes ask the question, no-one will think any less of you if they are worth knowing. I would also advertise your services as suggested by LaurenM. I would jump at the chance of having someone as experienced as you riding my boy xx
 
I'm sure you will find someone who will be delighted for you to ride their horse. You may need to be slightly more selective about which horses you would actually like to ride! Go for it - there are so many horses around who do very little and their owners would be thrilled to have an experienced rider to do something with them. Good luck!
 
Yes ask them,many people are glad to have someone to ride especially during the winter when they may be short of time.If you lived near me I would be more than happy for a competent,yet rusty rider to help out.

BTW I dont think elsbells changed her mind,i think she answered your last question,shall I just bite the bullet?
 
Where abouts are you, and what sort of horse do you 'normally' ride?

There may be someone on here who can offer you a ride in lue of some yard work?
 
Go for it - ASK! What harm can it do?

Like others have said - most people would be glad of the help!

I own a pony now but I am 29 and lived 15 yrs of riding other peoples horses for free - when I was 15 I rode 6 different horses for different people who needed the help!
I started looking after my pony 3/12 yrs ago for a family that needed help - it didnt cost me thing and now I own her (and she was given to me!)

Good luck - I wish you was near me as I have two ponies and nobody to hack out with!

x
 
Once was lost said:
Could I ask what was it that made you change your mind?

I know it is a big ask that is likely to be a no, letting somebody else ride your horse is a huge risk is several areas and I don't want my friend thinking I am out of order/trying to take advantage, I value the friendship.
Click to expand...

Sorry about that. I meant to say, yes, ask.:)

I'm a novice owner and rider and I bet your a lot more experienced and better than me.

Lots of people are looking for help with the chores and riding too. My friend who has a baby and works full-time, rides my girl which includes schooling her properly when she can. It is about once a fortnight and a real plus for me because she is a good little rider. I'm constantly in danger of someone at the yard poaching her off me, in fact I think there is a bit of a queue;)
 
ASK ASK ASKKKK!!!

i WISH i could find someone (next year) to ride my mare when im a busy bee, but when i mention it to my horseless 'horsey' friends they turn there noses up.. nowt querer than folk :D
 
Thanks for all the responses :)

I am in Oxfordshire but limited to where I can get to due to not having a car, next year when my youngest starts full time school I am planning on becoming self employed and doing holiday and cover for people short on time to do their horses, I managed to pick up work this summer without looking for it and I know there are a couple of people in the village who would use me, I am hoping to buy myself a little runabout so I can go out to people when I do that as there wouldn't be enough work in our very small village but until then, no regular transport :(

I am riding a bit of a variety at the moment, I am more used to 14.2 - 15.2 pony types and I ride a 14.2 Connemara most at the moment, he has been the perfect pony to get me back in, a good pony but makes you work for what you get! I am getting more experience with larger horses at the moment to and ride a 16.2 TB type who is fab.
Most people in the village have big warmbloods so would take a little getting used to.
I think I will ask, making it clear I completely understand if the answer is no or she doesn't know anybody, if by chance the answer was yes I would naturally ride for the first few times with the owner present so they could let me know the ins and outs of the horse and what they do and don't want from a rider.
Your responses have bolstered up my courage to ask, I had in the back of my head that now is a good time, as the nights draw in and people don't get home from work until past dark they may be glad of someone who can be at the yard in the day to muck out/rug change/check and maybe even ride.
One more question while we are here, with my plans to try and make a few pounds of extra income next year (hoping to just make enough to run a small car and pay for the children's after school activities) would I be setting a bad president if I took on some work for free just to get myself out there and known, if I did things for free once would it then be impossible to ask to be paid?

Thanks again for reading and the constructive help :D
 
That's a great idea - get to do the thing you love most, maybe get a ride and also earn some extra cash.
I own my own business - its a domestic and office cleaning company and I have 6 staff - i also offer pet care - but tbh the only thing I get (which is fine by me!) is dog sitting when people are on holiday. I have them in my home as one of my dogs but it is mainly my cleaning clients dogs. I get £100 per week for a dog board.
As an amimal lover - is this something you could offer?

R x
 
If you were my friend, I would want you to ask, however, as your friend I would have already offered. The only thing I'd say re. the one with the livery is there might be an insurance issue, but if you're getting your own insurance that should not be a problem.

You know you can do this, so get some confidence and ask :D

I have horses that I could do with some help with, due to D1 going to sixth form to study four A Levels and D2 going back to school, but from what I've seen, getting someone good and committed seems to be less than easy. We're too far away from you, or I'd say come and meet the Hairy Gang.

I hope it all goes well :D. Let us know how you get on :D.
 
Put an advert in your local tack shop and I am sure you will get phone calls. I am currently looking for some help with my gelding as I am pregnant and would love someone experienced like yourself to ride him, as the more experience the rider the more safe I would feel my horse was in their care.
You don't necessarily need rider insurance either. My horse is fully insured for any rider to ride him. It just depends on the owner's insurance policy.
 
go for it!!! i think you'll be surprised at how many people do want someone to help but never actually get around to asking or advertising... people like me lol!
 
Yes, I am sure you could find someone's horse(s) to ride on this basis.
I have ridden like this for the past 5 years, (with a share in the middle too). There are many people needing their horses excercised who won't want money in return.
 
Just thought I would give a little update since everybody who replied to me was so helpful and encouraging :D

Saw the friend who has the yard at a village social this afternoon and I mentioned in conversation that I was really keen to try and get more riding, I was very subtle for a few reasons, main one is I am really quite shy and asking people out right for things is not something I am able to do (even my closest friends, they are working on me and I am getting better but talking about my two closest friends in the world, you know the ones you would give all you had in the world to help them if needed and trust with not only your life but your childrens, the friend with the yard is a friend, but we are not really close) and also because she personally doesn't have a suitable horse for me to ride (one is turned away at least until next spring and the other she has had for only six months and is her competing dressage horse, not in a place for others to ride him and I would never in a million years ask to ride this horse, not that I don't think IO could handle him or that he is even a really difficult ride, it's just he is her project and they are still bonding... don't know why I am explaining to people who understand lol!) so it would be more of a case of her maybe knowing someone, anyway, lamented with her the fact that other then the horses on her yard there are only children's ponies in the village. Left it at that as we both needed to get our children home.
Saw her at the yard a couple of hours later and she was the one who brought up the issue of me looking for some riding and the long and the short of it is that I haven't got a ride yet but her Mums 20 year old light work and hacking mare is a ride she thinks I would enjoy, forward going but safe as houses, her parents are away right now but she is going to talk to her Mum about the possibility and mentioned how nice it would be if we could both do some hacking together after dropping the children at school :D :D
So it looks promising, I also asked her to keep her ear to the ground for people needing extra help in the winter who may exchange yard work for riding and she is more then happy to do this :D

So, I wanted to say thank you for encouraging me and giving me the boost that if you were asked you would be offended or feel used, that was my biggest fear, I never, ever, ever want somebody to think I am simply using them to get what I want.
Thank you again, if I get the chance to ride this mare I will post and let you know how it goes!
ps. well done for getting through my rather exited ramble, drinks are on me!
 
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