Unwanted Advice

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NeilM

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This morning my OH and I were riding along a quiet country road, about 100 yards from a bridleway that we were about to take, and at the top of a slight hill. We were being a little careful, as we are still getting our new pony used to her rider, friend (my gelding), surroundings and routine.

We had been passed by a couple of cars, which is pretty unusual on this road and three lovely hunters had not long past us in the opposite direction when all of a sudden a car slowly overtaking my OH stopped, the elderly male driver wound down the passenger window and said "If you don't mind me offering advice, you'd be less likely to be hit from behind if you weren't in the middle of the road".

I didn't hear any of this, as I was about fifteen or twenty yards ahead, plus I'm deaf in my right ear, so I can't hear much on that side (despite wearing a hearing aid), but I had glanced back a few moments before the car caught up, and my OH was maybe couple of feet from the dry stone wall at the edge of the road, and given that he was alongside her when he offered his gem of advice, it is pretty obvious that the road was plenty wide enough for him to pass (especially as she had stopped to let him pass) and that she was not in the "middle of the road".

Had he shouted at me, first I wouldn't have been able to make out what he was saying and if I had I probably would have informed him that I had every right to use a PUBLIC HIGHWAY and where I choose to ride my horse on that highway is entirely dependant on the road conditions at the time, much the same as when I drive a car. Either that or I would have just told him to .... well you know.

Anyone else had a shouting at?
 
To be honest I would have been more upset if driver had passed at speed or too close without any concern for horse and rider safety. Unwanted advice can be irritating but on balance at least driver was showing some awareness of the dangers to horse and riders on the roads.
 
Haha, oh don't you just love interfering people. I hope your OH gave him what-for?

Last week. Lady shouted at me because I stuck my schooling whip out far enough that she couldn't squeeze past me.

It was deliberate. I knew she was going to try about 500m back when I was her bombing along. So I went wider and put the whip out! (which is why I carry a longer one!!) There were cars on the other side, and wasn't enough room for all of us.

Also had a man call me a 'vile human being who shouldn't be allowed animals' because I was 'battering' Red with my whip. Yes, I was using it. Yes, I was giving him a good boot. But he was napping (which he no longer does, because funnily enough, he knows he'll get a bloody good boot!), and that man thought he was spooking (because he was sweaty. He hadn't yet been clipped and was trotted a good 3 miles and up a rather steep hill. Plus he was being a prat- but what do I know?)

Obviously, a man that has never met me or my pony knows both of us better than I do!!

Unfortunately, it took a long time to stop believing what he'd said- and so the napping went on for longer than it should have!

Ax
 
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Yep.. quickly dismounted off my mare as a motorbike was coming.. he wasn't showing signs of slowing down enough so I gave him a slow down hand signal he then shouted at me "I AM SLOWING DOWN" he didn't sound all there however.
 
Pen said:
at least driver was showing some awareness of the dangers to horse and riders on the roads.
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Well yes, that is another way of looking at it, but I guess in my other life as a cyclist, I am so used to being berated merely for the offences of drawing breath and being on 'their' roads, that as soon as someone starts to offer an opinion, I take umbrage.

However, the points remain that my OH was nowhere near the middle of the road and that if either of us were hit from behind it would be because the person in the car was at fault in their driving.

Amiee, I also ride with a whip and have had contact with a few car windscreens, despite being jammed up against the wall / hedge at the side of the road. There are some truly awful drivers out there.
 
That's actually quite a polite thing to say round where I am. Comments about me, my horse and my riding on the roads are usually more 'colourful' but thankfully not very often (:
 
why wasn't he beside the dry stone wall? A few feet away is quite a lot.. was there a ditch of something?
And why were you so far behind? Normal good manners is to ride as a group so cars don't have to weave in and out but can overtake as one unit..
 
SusieT said:
why wasn't he beside the dry stone wall? A few feet away is quite a lot.. was there a ditch of something?
And why were you so far behind? Normal good manners is to ride as a group so cars don't have to weave in and out but can overtake as one unit..
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He's a she and why should she be jammed up against that wall? She was in a safe position and as already stated there was more than enough room for cars to pass, otherwise the driver would not have been able to stop alongside my OH.

What difference does it make where I was? As it happens, my OH had stopped for the car and I hadn't noticed, as I was chatting with H as we rode down the steepest part of the hill.

As a cyclist and horse rider (as well as high mileage business driver), I refuse to conform to what other road users think I should be doing and the made up versions of the Highway Code they are so keen on spouting. What all of it means is GET OUT OF MY WAY. Sorry, but it's a public amenity and I have as much right to use it (considerately) as anyone else, the fact that I am on a horse and only doing 5M.P.H is tough, chill out and enjoy the sunshine for the 15 seconds it takes me to get out of your way.

Had we been riding side by side in the middle of the road, he would have had a valid point, but as we were riding at the side of the road in single file, I just considered he was being a pompous old ...... man.
 
I never said jammed - sounds to be honest that you were out for a dander that was too relaxed - the car user was right, they weren't going to hit you but someone else might and whiel they might be the drivers fault we have a responsibility to keep ourselves sage as well which means not wandering down the road in a straggling line but going in a sensible one unit fashion - by the fact you hadn't noticed the car or your party member stopping one can only assume you weren't paying attention (chatting) so I'm afraid maybe you need to re evaluate your road strategies - not for anyone elses sake but your own and your horses. Saying they shouldn't expect us to move is all very well after your horse has a broken leg..
 
Having read tour varios comments I have to say I can't quite understand where you all were in relation to each other when the driver pulled alongside. Originally I read it that you were about 15-20 yards ahead. I was always taught to ride in close order on the road as you definitely did not want a car to try to slot in between you.

Whilst it may have been frustrating to your OH that the driver pulled up alongside at least it sounds as though they were polite and trying to be helpful. I've had this happen to me before and just have to accept that not everyone understands horses. I've also been harangued by a driver for riding my horse on the road and know for sure which driver I would rather meet!
 
NeilM said:
the elderly male driver wound down the passenger window and said "If you don't mind me offering advice, you'd be less likely to be hit from behind if you weren't in the middle of the road".

Anyone else had a shouting at?
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Was he shouting or did he just 'say' as in 'the elderly male driver wound down the passenger window and said ...' ?
 
Hmmm, this thread appears to be going off track.

Looks like it was all my fault, how dare my OH and I take our ponies out on a quiet country road, in the sunshine, for a Sunday morning hack.
 
Why is the thread going off track? There are just a few people not quite in agreement with you and offering their thoughts. There might be something to take away and think about from them, or there might not. Nobody is saying you shouldn't have dared be out for a hack, no need for dramatics.
 
You can say thank-you, I'll take that on board, thanks for slowing down and have a nice day. Give him the finger mentally but he'll think that horse riders are polite and friendly if a little bit inconveniently positioned (his opinion).
No advantage to telling him to f off.
 
I don't really get why you were so bothered by this. Someone passed you slowly and sensibly, gave you some well-meaning advice, and you have taken offence? Maybe you don't agree with what he told you, but that doesn't mean he did anything wrong. He wasn't rude, aggressive or unreasonable, so I can't really see the problem. I think you are maybe over-reacting a little!
 
LJR said:
I wouldn't take offence - was he saying or shouting?
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I didn't take offence, I drive far too many miles and see far too many stupid things that people do in their cars every day to take offence from an old man.

I didn't say he was shouting, although he may have been, as my OH was probably the best part of six feet away from where he was, and he was in his car. If I am being pedantic, and it appear we are, I asked if anyone else had been shouted at. I accept that that infers my OH had been shouted at, rather than spoken to, but at the time it felt like slightly humorous and tongue in cheek question at the time.

As for keeping myself, (and my pony) safe; I do so at all times, which is why 1) I am still alive after over 35 years of sharing the roads with others on a daily basis. (2) I found the whole situation more than slightly ridiculous.
 
To those who suggested that riders should ride close to dry stone walls, this is not a good idea, it gives you no space for the horse to side step, often the footings come out further than you expect, then there are the throughs which can stick out a good way and do no favours to anyones legs!
 
You always get the odd driver (usually non-horsey) who occassionally give "advice". When I was leading out my mare (during backing) just down the road - a country road with not much traffic, the local 85yr old farmer decided to stop and tell me I was on the wrong side of the road! No I wasn't and who was he to tell me anyway! He knows nothing about horses. I had to stop myself saying the same back to him the other day when I was in my car and he was moving cows along the road (who of course go everywhere), I would have found it amusing.
 
I was shouted at for being a rude, arrogant ignorant rider when I wouldn't allow a motorbike to over take me on a narrow BRIDLEWAY with barbed wire either side. Gotta love people and they opinions about who should be where. I politely pointed out if I had slowed down his journey too much he might want to take the road next time.
 
I've been on a small road that only 1 car could fit down, and a car has been coming the opposite way. The lady stopped in the car (was a big 4x4) and waiting for me to come down. It was full of pot holes and not in great condition tbh so I was just walking.. obviously asking the boy to step it up a bit. As I was going past she stuck her head out the window and said "doesn't your horse trot?" I politely told her that it wasn't suitable to trot on that road because of the state it was in. She just looked at me and drove on.

I just took it as someone who was non-horsey not having a clue really, and she still stopped and waited for me rather than trying to squeeze past. In situations like that, you just have to shrug and be polite I guess.... otherwise they may not be so careful with horses in future.
 
Riding too closely to a wall gives you nowhere to go if a driver passes too close. I've had my stirrup banged by a motorist trying to squeeze past instead of waiting 2 seconds.

My friend got yelled at by a cyclist as we were riding at a walk on a bridlepath. He shouted that we shouldn't be riding there. Much to the amusement of dog walkers who'd heard the admonishment, my friend cantered after the cyclist and rode along side him to point out that it was a bridlepath. The cyclist turned white and pedalled furiously to outpace the very fit 16.2 eventer.
 
MerrySherryRider said:
Much to the amusement of dog walkers who'd heard the admonishment, my friend cantered after the cyclist and rode along side him to point out that it was a bridlepath. The cyclist turned white and pedalled furiously to outpace the very fit 16.2 eventer.
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Outstanding, even as a mountain biker, that is still funny.
 
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