Mavis Cluttergusset
Well-Known Member
Is it a terrible thing to leave a lesson if you don't feel it is right for you? I have just done it and I feel dreadful. Im sorry it's so long, I need to vent and some reassurance that it's not such a bad thing to do (or maybe a slap for being so rude, Im not sure)
I have regular fortnightly lessons with a lady who I really like, I like her methods and I feel that she has improved my way of riding and P's way of going for me so much. We have worked hard on getting P to soften for me, and have got to the point where I actually feel I can ride her as opposed to just passenger. I can now get P to work in a lovely long, low outline whilst still being nice and forward and light, and I can also get her to work up into the bridle. This hasn't been easy for me but we have really improved. Last week I had a jumping session with my instructor and P was brilliant, really balanced and soft and listening, so buoyed by that I agreed to join a gridwork session being held at my yard with a local person.
I got in and warmed up, concentrating on long, low and soft (as my regular instructor has advised, for the first 10 minutes and last 10 minutes of being in the school), and was told not to work her 'on the bit'. To my mind there is a difference between slopping along on a loose rein and actually encouraging a horse to lower and soften before actually taking up a stronger contact and working it into the bridle(which is what I would call working on the bit), but I did as I was told and dropped any form of contact which immediately meant P was gawping about and concentrating on anything other than work. I was then called in and lectured on my choice of tack. I ride in a hippus loose ring snaffle, which P is happy and relaxed in, and recently a grakle because I hadnt bothered to change it since hunting the other day and also because my instructor advised me to use a flash and I dont like how low my flash sits, so I use a grakle which P seems happy and relaxed in. I do hack in a cavesson usually, if I remember to change my tack. I was told there is no reason to ever use a noseband other than a plain cavesson as the horse needs to lick and chew - I might well be wrong here but P can still move her mouth and chew gently in her noseband and relax her jaw, it just discourages her from yawing and crossing her jaw which she does do - not so much recently but she has moments of it. I tried to defend my choice of tack and failed. I also wear spurs for lessons as she is much more forward off my leg, and I felt that this was also frowned upon. The instructor was more of a natural horsemanship kind of person, and I felt like a bit of a brute!
The other horses arrived gradually (1/2 an hour late!) and in the end there were 10 or so in the school from a small pony to an ex racehorse who hadn't seen poles before. We then had to trot en masse, with no rein contact at all, then file over trotting poles which were too close for P so she shambled over them/jumped them. The front 3 poles were then put up so that alternate ends were raised, which resulted in even messier shambling due to their extreme closeness, all the time we were being told to trot 'as fast as possible'. All the time P was wired, with no rein contact she was practically inside out the whole time, with her neck practically vertical and her back all tight and horrid, and with all the other horses going all over the place it was hard to see what, if anything, we might achieve - particularly when the grid went up as there wasn't enough space to bounce the fences. So I went over to the instructor, explained that I didn't wish to offend her but that the session wasn't for me, and left.
And now I feel awful.
Would you have just put up with it and tried to gain something from the lesson, or walked away? Sorry it's so long, I hate offending people and I feel I really have this time.
I have regular fortnightly lessons with a lady who I really like, I like her methods and I feel that she has improved my way of riding and P's way of going for me so much. We have worked hard on getting P to soften for me, and have got to the point where I actually feel I can ride her as opposed to just passenger. I can now get P to work in a lovely long, low outline whilst still being nice and forward and light, and I can also get her to work up into the bridle. This hasn't been easy for me but we have really improved. Last week I had a jumping session with my instructor and P was brilliant, really balanced and soft and listening, so buoyed by that I agreed to join a gridwork session being held at my yard with a local person.
I got in and warmed up, concentrating on long, low and soft (as my regular instructor has advised, for the first 10 minutes and last 10 minutes of being in the school), and was told not to work her 'on the bit'. To my mind there is a difference between slopping along on a loose rein and actually encouraging a horse to lower and soften before actually taking up a stronger contact and working it into the bridle(which is what I would call working on the bit), but I did as I was told and dropped any form of contact which immediately meant P was gawping about and concentrating on anything other than work. I was then called in and lectured on my choice of tack. I ride in a hippus loose ring snaffle, which P is happy and relaxed in, and recently a grakle because I hadnt bothered to change it since hunting the other day and also because my instructor advised me to use a flash and I dont like how low my flash sits, so I use a grakle which P seems happy and relaxed in. I do hack in a cavesson usually, if I remember to change my tack. I was told there is no reason to ever use a noseband other than a plain cavesson as the horse needs to lick and chew - I might well be wrong here but P can still move her mouth and chew gently in her noseband and relax her jaw, it just discourages her from yawing and crossing her jaw which she does do - not so much recently but she has moments of it. I tried to defend my choice of tack and failed. I also wear spurs for lessons as she is much more forward off my leg, and I felt that this was also frowned upon. The instructor was more of a natural horsemanship kind of person, and I felt like a bit of a brute!
The other horses arrived gradually (1/2 an hour late!) and in the end there were 10 or so in the school from a small pony to an ex racehorse who hadn't seen poles before. We then had to trot en masse, with no rein contact at all, then file over trotting poles which were too close for P so she shambled over them/jumped them. The front 3 poles were then put up so that alternate ends were raised, which resulted in even messier shambling due to their extreme closeness, all the time we were being told to trot 'as fast as possible'. All the time P was wired, with no rein contact she was practically inside out the whole time, with her neck practically vertical and her back all tight and horrid, and with all the other horses going all over the place it was hard to see what, if anything, we might achieve - particularly when the grid went up as there wasn't enough space to bounce the fences. So I went over to the instructor, explained that I didn't wish to offend her but that the session wasn't for me, and left.
And now I feel awful.
Would you have just put up with it and tried to gain something from the lesson, or walked away? Sorry it's so long, I hate offending people and I feel I really have this time.
