What can I do with this horse

[pepsimaxrock]

I'm sort of falling out of love with riding and horses I think.
My little horse had colic surgery last year and bringing her back has been v v difficult and complicated. My insurance is bust and there's less than no money left for further expensive treatments.
Recently she colicked mildly 4 times in 4 weeks due to the Spring grass and is back on steroids and can't get out to grass. Fortunately she is turned out with mate in indoor school for half a day.
She needs work though and whilst on a prearranged family holiday last week I had her exercised twice. Seemed happy enough when I rode her on my return. Reasonably quiet.
I'd been starting to get her back to jumping - oh and I mean teeny tiny poles - but I'm having to do this alone as my regular RI is in the midst of a lengthy family emergency.
Anyway yesterday I tried to jump her - I'm sick of being a wimp and bottling out - and she was ok at first then got v v excited after the jumps. I tried pulling her up after the jumps she didn't want to and it ended up as a fight. Inevitably I had a crashing fall against the arena walls on the jump wings and poles and am v sore today and can't face the horse or the yard. Little bit depressed too.
I feel as though I need another home for my horse but she is damaged through colic surgery and I couldn't even give her away.
Sorry to ramble but looking for some advice if possible xxx

 

[xspiralx]

Can you get another trainer to school her for you and get her jumping again? I wouldn't try and jump her by yourself if she gets that over the top.

Are there other things you can do with her that she's more sensible with? Hacking, schooling?

 

[be positive]

Colic surgery is not the end of the world, you have got through the worst and now it is down to management, my horse recovered from surgery and went on to have a normal life doing what he did before surgery, he did have a few minor colics afterwards but was actually better living out 24/7 on grass, restricted to an extent, than living in eating hay which tended to make him a bit bunged up at times, even coming in at night was not ideal for him.
I also had a pony, bought after colic surgery, who again had minor colic over the years he was also best on restricted grazing and moving about 24/7.

Your mare is probably feeling rather well, becoming too fresh from not enough exercise and only getting turned out in a school that will not be helping her settle when jumping and will contribute to her being excited, could she not go out on a bare paddock, I realise at livery you are a bit limited with options but the right yard will have the welfare of its liveries in mind and should be able to provide restricted turnout, muzzling may be another option so she can get out and get rid of some excess energy.

As for not being able to give her away, loaning is an option if you do want a break or getting a sharer if you want to stay fully in control without needing to be totally involved every day.

 

[pepsimaxrock]

Yes I think she is very well. Steroids and restricted turnout see to work. I could certainly school her - hacking alone is impossible as we are on v v busy road and nobody else hacks.
I might have her exercised everyday for a coupe of weeks.

 

[ycbm]

Pepsimax I think people need to be aware that colic surgery had left your mare with a hernia and that she probably is genuinely unsellable.

I'm so sorry you feel this way after everything you did to get her through the allergy to the stitches

 

[WandaMare]

If I were you I would do a few nice things for yourself today and take the pressure off. It sounds as though it has all got a bit on top of you, and I think all of us with horses know that feeling and its really hard.

Nursing them through colic is difficult and stressful so you've done really well to get her this far.

I would wait until your instructor is back on track or find someone else in the meantime to help, but don't push yourself too hard. You will get back to enjoying her again.

 

[pepsimaxrock]

Pepsimax I think people need to be aware that colic surgery had left your mare with a hernia and that she probably is genuinely unsellable.
(

oh yes, and thats another thing ..... (I'd forgotton about it, seems minor compared to everything else) but at least it doesnt seem to be bothering her. I'm very aware she is unsaleable - I dont think I could even give her away (yet she's a favourite ride at the yard..)

 

[benz]

If I were you I would do a few nice things for yourself today and take the pressure off. It sounds as though it has all got a bit on top of you, and I think all of us with horses know that feeling and its really hard.

Nursing them through colic is difficult and stressful so you've done really well to get her this far.

I would wait until your instructor is back on track or find someone else in the meantime to help, but don't push yourself too hard. You will get back to enjoying her again.

Totally agree, you have both been through a huge amount of stress, take the pressure off until you are both in a place to do more. If she a favourite at the yard can you find someone who will share her? At least to do the riding so you don't have to.

 

[Wagtail]

You are feeling very down right now and sometimes that makes us think in extreme terms (in your case of freeing yourself from your horse and riding). You are physically hurt too and so your body will be in shock. I think people underestimate the psychological effect this can have on us sometimes. Take a step back and don't force yourself to do anything you don't want to do. If there are other who can exercise her for a bit, then arrange that. You need to be in a happier place before deciding on her and your long term future together or apart.

 

[pepsimaxrock]

Thanks - and yes Im not in a great place. It sounds so selfish but after all the work I put into her I wish she'd be a bit nicer! But I also know I cant blame her, and she is, on a good day (most days) a lovely horse.
I have put her in for schooling for two weeks - she will be ridden by experts every weekday - hacking, schooling and plenty jumping.
Its probably me who needs the schooling but its a start. Thanks for all your support xxx