What holds you back?

A few things! I'm not terribly driven anyway, and my boy will be 19 this year, and with DJD we are looking at light hacking. I tend to think, well, he's knocking on, he's not going to start jumping/showing/hunting now - I left it too late.

Since having our own land (five years) I find that I'm not as inspired as I used to be - riding on my own is nice, but I don't push myself. Still, I have Ellie to break this year, so me and the OH will have to push ourselves, in order to push her too - I'm sure this will have it's moments, will post pics!
 
For me it's the combination of over thinking, getting far too paranoid and confidence and as a result I often don't ride on enough when I need to. I've no problems with hairing round a course of show jumps or a decent gallop but solid XC jumps over about 80cm scare the crap out of me sometimes because me and the horse took a tumble over a solid jump and then I saw a serious fall which made me think what if that's me?
I just need to stop thinking and start riding on more :p
 
Koko I'm still waiting on the patent before telling anyone ;)

I really need to not let it get to me but it's so hard sometimes it's probably worse cos he is the first pony that's been mine and he needed a bit of work and I had doubters from the start :( but he is doing good now so just need to crack on and get him out :)
 
For me its mostly physical, I have Rheumatoid arthritis and it causes me lots of pain.

Next would be not as strong in my core muscles as I should be because having RA means I struggle to exercise regularly

I am trying harder though as I really want to improve
 
Nerves :(

Spent 10 mins stood on the mounting block yesterday, just couldn't get on :( Walked him round the day before but the time before that (before the snow) he bronc'd me around 3 sides of the arena... nothing to cause it, I didn't come off and he relaxed after and I continued to ride not leaping off asap but it's still there in my head :/ Stupid 'What-if-itus' :(

Even more anoyingly is I took him to our first group dressage lesson/clinic on the 31st Oct and he did canter off a few times (he found it too slow paced) but nothing bad happened and towards the end I almost wanted to kick on and enjoy the canter but the confidence never seems to stick around for more than a few hours :/

When I first got him 4.5 yrs ago 3 weeks after his last race we used to go out on our own down the main road and canter round the bridleways and then 6weeks on he ditched me on the road out of the blue and has damaged my back. I think the pressure I put on myself to get back to do those things with him is making it worse, especially as he is now 20 and I don't want our time to run out before we have a chance to get back there.

Has anyone found sports psychology helped? Or a really good instuctor? As my current no outside help situ isn't working. Ideas welcomed

Sorry to have rambled on so much and hope you don't mind me stepping into your thread :)
 
A pony that has been overjumped in the past who now doesn't want to do it anymore. So we do the occasional 2'3 round but I don't ask any more of him.

I'd like to be able to do ODE's etc but am focusing on dressage instead and perhaps some le trec - and then when I have time and money, may look for a part loan to compete jumping on again.
 
Awesome thread... I've a few:

Physical - I've a gammy right knee and very bad (from birth) left hip - consequently depending on which is more sore that day I can be a bit wonky - Solution - I'm doing Pilates daily to try and strengthen my body up to cope with the wonky and get me straight. Also planning lunge lessons and doing more work without stirrups....

Mental - Lack of belief, Grief for the boys, Confidence wobbles (occassional) - solution - working on new skills and accepting that whilst I am not world class its the journey that counts, confidence in Boo will come with time but thinking of getting some confidence coaching, grief - accepting they're gone - stop comparing her to them and start to value her more

Competition - I don't have my own transport (and for the last 4 yrs not had a horse I could compete on) and funds are scarily tight right now - solution - I've just moved in with OH to save some cash (and because he's wonderful) and I am going to be more forward beg, borrowing and stealing lifts. Going to join local riding club that a few people on the yard are memebers of...

But mostly - I am going to enjoy the little moments, focus on Boo and our journey and celebrate our sucessess and the rest will come!

xx
 
Great thread!

For me it is my age now mostly. I used to go out and do loads of local RC comps - dressage and XC mostly (loved XC). I bought my current horse 8 years ago with the view to advancing in these areas. However, I had lost my confidence on my previous horse due to a bolting experience and it took longer to come back with the new horse than I thought, and I had had her for just over a year before I felt happy to start going out and about again.

She then had a major accident in the field and was off for nearly a year and has never really come back 100% properly since then. During this period my job changed and I was taking on more responsibility and working longer hours and never seemed to have the time to put the work in during the week. And now I've turned into a weekend happy hacker due to the time restraints and my lack of confidence that has come with getting older. I jump judge at our RC XC events and I still sometimes get that little "if only" moment.

Maybe when I get my next horse after this one is no longer around ...
 
It is a good thread. I spend so long talking myself into being scared that its become a real issue. When I go out and compete at 60 cm (and its taken me ages to get there) I am faced with everyone saying...'How are you feeling, you'll be alright' etc etc and it makes things so much worse. That and show organisers always pushing for more... next you can do the 80 etc etc. TBH as I've got older I think it is OK to compete low level and enjoy it. I probably need to get more into dressage but find it terribly dull. That's what I should work on though and see if I can go Elem this year on my baby horse
 
Money, or lack of! I've got to where I wanted to competitive-wise, the only thing stopping me carrying on is the ridiculous entry fees and not enough money to pay for them!

The one thing which holds me back in eventing is my dressage. I get in a total mental state over it. I dont think I am a good rider at all, when I warm up alongside very decent riders and horses I feel like they look at me and my horse wondering why we're there! I get extremely tense about it and frequently have gone wrong in a test because of stressing out, and burst into tears. Doing Burgie CIC* last year I went wrong in the test and cried for the last half of it (in front of some spectators too which is humiliating!). I only put myself through it for the jumping bits (which we went double clear in so that cheered me up!). It's irritating though as I have a horse who is brilliant at the jumping bits, so its purely our cruddy dressage scores (all due to me - my poor little horse does exactly as he's told!) that hold us back.
 
Whats holding me back, well, firstly share horse of 4 years PTS in Nov.
I am now trying to get up courage to buy my own to share with my sister and a pony for daughter and niece to share. Have lovely field to keep them in, just lacking confidence about the purchasing, there are so many sharks out there.
 
Mainly my lack of confidence/ability I'm 42 now and everything is very very scarey, my horses have ability..okay they are cobs so it's jumping of a fashion but they both love XC, hunting and fun rides and I do try most things but usually I'm terrified and wish I wasn't! I'll gallop on a open field or beach for as long and as fast as you want but throw a little jump into the mix and I absolutely fall apart..the boys can jump but I can't which is very frustrating!!

But also lack of time with 7 dogs, 2 horses, work full time and rescue to help run..I'm out the house at 6am and back at 9pm during the winter and the summer is even longer days.
 
Transport.

If I had ways of getting out to competitons, clinics and lessons we'd actually get somewhere (I think) that's the only thing, so a horsebox would solve many things.

Hubby said I need a decent horse to put in it first, I disagree :D
 
Family comitments, OH doesn't want me to ''disapear for weekends at a time', so I have to limit what competitions I do (1 per month or several then have a break).
Lack of money - I am in the bank robbing crew. WHY are competitions SO expensive??
Lack of freedom, I have yet to do my trailer test, so have to rely on others to tow which is never easy.
One day I will take it and pass, so that would help - if I had the money to do so!
I will have to pack OH and the kids off to his parents for the weekend, then I'll be free. Chances of that happening are a fine thing though. Oh well....
 
Great thread!

MagicMelon - what? How can anyone look at you and your horse and not think you should be there - in your sig you both look great!

Me - indecision, fear of "breaking" another horse. My pony is retired through injury and I'm worried it will happen again and I'll have two broken ponies. I'm currently riding a lovely little mare and she is fab but she's not really what I want. But then I think that maybe she is and I should give her a chance (she is for sale). What I want is a 16hh+, 5-10 year old that I can do lots of schooling with and jumping (not really competitions, just in the school or local riding club stuff). But I worry that I'll break him/her and that'll be it. I'm also worried that i've not jumped properly for so long that I've lost confidence and ability. The mare has never jumped so I'd have to teach her.

What am I going to do about it - see how the next few months go with the mare and then see what my heart says. Book myself some private jumping lessons at a riding school to scratch the itch to jump and keep my confidence in order.
 
I hold me back. Confidence, lack of belief that I can actually ride.

I am also far too easily stressed my the prescence of others and my perception that they are scrutinising what I am doing and critising me... I need to work on my self belief, grow a thicker skin and get some more lessons booked.

I also need to learn to push myself out of my comfort zone from time to time - as this will help me with building my confidnce.
 
Lack of advice, job, riding time.
She's restored my confidence after we fixed the mounting issues. Getting on freaks me out, falling off doesn't. I would like to get through our local show with all the limbs we started with. Current thinking is that if we hack then she will be more tired and less spooky once we get there.
 
It used to be my confidence, but now I trust my horse pretty much 100% (still a wuss on anything else though!) :D

Now it's my weight - I feel that it's going to be difficult for me to progress any further with my riding while I'm a big wobbly lump, so I'm working on that. Money is another issue, horse is still sharing a saddle because I can't afford to buy him one of his own! And having a horse who, although he loves jumping, just can't quite manage anything bigger than about 1'9"!

The very biggest thing holding me back though, is uni... I don't get to ride at all during term time, so every time I come home for the holidays I have to try and get back into the swing of things again, and by the time I've got past the achey legs stage it's time to go back to uni! Sad times. :(
 
Sounds like theres a lot out there with confidence issues. Glad to hear people have ways for overcoming them, it was the hardest thing I had to do is get back on my horse but once I achieved it I felt like a big weight had been lifted. Thos with nerves though, do you feel that your a good rider but nervous?

Those who said money- Bank robbing crew welcomes you, the more the merrier (and richer) ;)
 
Money and where I live no motorways, expensive facilities hire and no resident professionals. Nearest BE course 80 miles away, nearest indoor BS 80 miles away over the mountains.
Visiting dressage trainer once a month but dressage isn't my weak spot.
No BE or BS clinics within a 90 mile radius
I have the lorry I have the horse I just don't have access to training.
 
time and money and bad weather!

I don't get to ride more than 3 or 4 times a week at best, less in winter when it is dark so early.

I can't afford to run my own horse transport so i have to hire a lorry to go to training days or bigger competitions, I am very lucky that there are some shows/dressage I can hack to though and I can afford to hire the lorry to go out sometimes.

If I worked part time I would have more time but then I would not be able to hire the lorry or have lessons.

Not a great deal I can do about the situation but just be grateful to for the things I can do.
 
Confidence: I am one of those odd people who can worry themselves sick about competing for days and weeks in advance and although I am generally pretty cool by the time I get there, I've worn myself out and am often too tired to just enjoy the experience!!

Age: A horrible feeling that perhaps the clock is beating me to my ambitions as another joint starts clicking/creaking or just not working!

Energy: work can often leave me feeling ragged and doesn't always play 'ball' when the season is in full swing.

So I think I've just talked myself into needing to source a motivational coaching session, then...
 
My highly developed sense of self preservation - which at the age of 48, is getting more impenetrable. I have a really serious fear of falling off. At 48, I don't bounce anymore, I just go SPLAT and lie there wondering if I'm dead this time. Falling off hurts!!!!

My weight - this IS solveable, but I just don't seem able to get my head around it. Can't get motivated and the shows are coming up and I'm still a big fat lump.

A very opiniated coloured native, who got in the wrong line before she was born. She got racehorse brains, not a 'ploddy' brain....... No returns, no exchanges......

A very late start to riding competitively. I'm competing against all these slim young things who've been riding since they were amoeba. But you have to be in it to win it.......


For all those with kids, and a shortage of £££££/time - this does get better because as the kids get older, they get their own jobs and you have to put your hand in your pocket less. You get more time with the pony, because the daughter who was sharing goes to university and finds another 'better' horse to ride for somebody else.
 
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