What would you do? (long!)

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wilde2

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I have had my horse 2 years, he is rising 7. He is coming on nicely but slowly. We found out on Christmas Eve that my husband has cancer - they have good success rate with treatment - but realistically I can't see I will have much time in the next 12 months for my horse, and will need to keep husbands horse (he is 20) ticking over. (as well as full time job with 4 hours commuting each day!) Also, I rely on husband to drive trailer each week to indoor school too. Husband is a saint(!) and thinks he will still be able to take me, but I think when he is feeling well enough to go out, it should be something he enjoys - and if I am not paying full livery for horse then can take him on holiday instead. So I think horse needs a new home - question is, should I try to sell or loan? He has a lot of potential, and home is more important than money - but he is not a complete novice horse as in some ways still babyish, and can put in some big bucks when excited. Thanks for reading - all ideas welcome - always had horses for life before so have no idea how to go about finding right home!
 
Hi there. I am so sorry to hear about your husband, I do hope he makes a full and speedy recovery after all his treatment.

What with everything else it sounds like you have to do day to day and with your husband needing your support I do think you are making the right decision by either loaning or selling.

I would loan out if possible, this is what I did with my mare, I always knew I did not want to sell her so loaning it was.
I would possibly sell if loaning does not work out,only because I think you will have an awful lot on your plate. All the best with everything and keep us up to date of how everything is going x
 
Hi
What rotten news for you both
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I hope he is soon on the mend.
I think if I were you I would try loaning if possible as then when hubby is better you can have the horse back if you want. I know loaning has a bit of bad press but it can work very well. I have my current mare on loan although I am hoping her owner might consent to selling her at some point
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All I would say is to try to go by recommendation, don't be worried to ask a few poeple about the possible loanee and try to cover all points when creating your contract.
I hope all works out well for all of you and keep us posted on hubby's progress
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So sorry about your husband. I hope he makes a quick recovery now they have diagnosed him.

I think you should look to loan your horse if possible. Your husband sounds a very caring chap and if you were to sell I think he might well feel it was his "fault" if that makes sense. Loaning means it is not permanent and your horse sounds a nice type that someone would like to loan. Make sure you get a proper loan agreement in place though so everyone knows who is responsible for what and how long it is for.
 
So sorry to hear about your husband!! All the best for a quick recovery!

Agree with MM, you are being very sensible and I think you are right to consider rehoming your horse.

Would also suggest selling as a loan horse can come back at any time and timing may not be good for you as you may want to be concentrating on your husband.
 
Sorry to hear news about your hubby - hope he makes a full recovery with treatment. You seem to have a very busy life so you are probably right to think about selling or loaning your horse. ((((hugs for you and healing vibes for hubby))))
 
Really sorry about your husband, i hope the treatment goes well and he is as good as new in no time.
How awful to have that news and then the worry of what to do about your horse.
I think you will have enough on your plate like you say.
I would think about loaning him out to someone, perhaps someone who competes would be interested and then you will know that he is still moving on with his education. The only problem with loaning is that if it doesn't work out, then you have the hassle and stress of getting him back and finding a new loan home for him.
Maybe there is someone you know who you could trust to not let you down with him.
I really hope it all works out for you.
 
as above, v sorry to hear about the diagnosis, sincerely hope the treatment is 100% successful.
the only thing i would say about loaning is to check the loaner out VERY carefully and make sure you can check up on the horse at any time (anyone decent won't mind this imho!), as i loaned a horse out once (to someone i knew already, and trusted...) and unfortunately my horse fell victim to what i call the 'company car mentality' - "i didn't pay for it so it doesn't matter if it gets damaged" kind of thing... some people are like this. i got him back and managed to get him right again but it wasn't a nice experience for him or me.
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so, check loaner out very carefully, and keep tabs on your horse, if you do decide to go down that route.
could you find a loaner/sharer who would keep the horse at existing yard, this might be the ideal solution perhaps?
very very best of luck.
 
Very sorry to hear about your husband and I hope that he makes a speedy recovery.

Sadly a number of loaned horses disapear each year never to be found again. If you intend loaning take some simple precautions. (Please be aware that the circumstances of the person loaning the horse can change as well).

If you do intend to loan your horse and however much you trust the people that you are loaning to have your horse both microchipped and freezemarked on it's shoulder (so that it can be seen when being ridden). Also take photos of the front rear and both sides of your horse. Also take some mane and tail including the root folicles and keep them in a plastic bag in a safe place.

When you loan out the horse get a proper agreement drawn up by a solicitor that specialises in equine matters. Also ask to see the original passport, driving licence and rates bill of the people loaning the horses so as to ensure they are who they claim to be and are verify where they live.
 
Good wishes to you both and I sincerely hope your husband makes a swift recovery and you, too, take care of yourself and life for both of you has an upturn.

I too would loan, initially. Perhaps you could loan from where they are presently with a view to move. In the meantime, perhaps you could advertise for someone to help you, to take some of the workload off your shoulders.

I am sure, when the going gets rough for you both, your horses will bring much comfort and take your minds off such a worrying situation.

Lots of love and hugs xxx
 
I'm very sorry to hear about your husband.

My advice would be to sell if possible. Only because as mentioned above there's always the possibility that a loaned horse could be returned at a time which is inconvenient to you (regardless of the terms of any loan agreement). Plus if your horse 'breaks' during the loan period that's another drama you could do without at this time.

At least by selling you've got one less responsibility and can focus fully on helping your husband recover.

Best wishes Michelle x
 
Sorry to hear about your husband, I hope he makes a full recovery asap.
I would loan as I couldn't bear to part with any of my animals but that is my own opinion and not necessarily a good one!
The decision I'm afraid is yours and yours alone at the end of the day, good luck in what ever you decide, Austin.
 
Hi Wilde2

I am so sorry that your husband is ill. Treatment has improved so much and you need to stay positive so take all the support you can get.

I am now going to disagree with what everyone else has said
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well you asked for opinions - so I guess that means more than one
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Firstly - I wouldn't make any hasty (permanent) decisions.

Secondly - If you like your horse and get pleasure out of owning/riding him then I would hang on to him. His company and the enjoyment you get from doing things with him might be just what you need to keep you going through the difficult times. If he was mine then I would turn him away (when the time was right) and then he is still there when you feel like "picking up the reins again". To cope with caring for your husband AND losing your horse sounds like a double wammy to me. I have had horses which I have had to turn away for similar reasons (in rented fields and not livery) and they ride off the field on an intermittent basis (because they are chilled and unfit) and frankly there were times when this was the ONLY thing which kept me sane. If he does nothing for a year then it wouldn't do him any harm either.

Thirdly - I would look to work nearer to home or work from home for part of the week. I have no idea what you do as a job but that kind of commute should be the first thing on the "hit list" - I kept the commute going long after I should have stopped!!

Fourthly - I have "lost" 2 loan horses - careless I know
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and they were loaned to people i knew from work who suddenly "disappeared"!!!

Just another view
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Good luck whatever you decide
 
I am sorry to hear about your husband and I hope the treatment is successful.

If you are very attached to your horse and selling him would be another hard thing to cope with - I would look at other options of keeping your horse as if times get hard you may find your horse a great comfort to you.

If you could get both your husbands horse and your horse living out on grass livery and perhaps also get a couple of sharers in that might help free up your time, and money. If you can find a place that does assisted grass livery then if you had sharers you would not need to go up every day. You and your husband could then visit your horses when you fell up to it and not worry about them when you can't make it up.
 
To hear that on Christmas Eve must have been a bit of a shock. I wish you and your husband well and hope the treatment is 100% successful.

Have you talked this through with your husband? I know you said the money saved on livery could be spent on a holiday, but is that what he would want? Would he prefer to have his animals/family around him rather than go on a holiday - just a suggestion - my OH prefers being at home and finds holidays generally stressful.

The suggestions of grass livery perhaps with sharers sounds quite good, as it would be more affordable and would mean that when your husband gets through this you can pick up where you left off. You will still have your horses. Alternatively, is it such a bad thing if your horses were to have a year off - just to be horses?

Hope it all works out for the best, Holly B
 
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