What would you do...

moodymare_1993

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I have had my mare since march. She is a 6yo 16.1 tb. Due to unfortunate circumstances throughout the year, we haven't manage to gel to each other like I had hoped and I am beginning to think that she may be too much horse for me. I was sold her as a novice ride, who hacks alone or in company, well she is definatley not a novice ride.
I was having trouble hacking her out so enlisted the help of an instructor, we started to do slightly better but then she tripped over a manhole in the field and cut her fetlock which resulted in nearly a month of box rest so it could heal properly.
Then the weather started to turn and she became a totally different horse. Definatley not nasty or a anything just your typical tb mare.
Anyway, in September my brother was in a horrific motorbike accident which resulted in life and death surgery and him losing his leg. And due to complications it will be a very long road of recovery for him.
But basically I bought this horse thinking I would be able to tack up and have a nice ride but she is too spirited. Most likely due to the fact I haven't been riding her cuz of the personal problems. I lost my boy in February and he wasn't exactly an easy ride but I wanted a horse I could have loads of fun on but with her I am constantly worried. I have no job as I am currently waiting on an operation myself on my wrist, But I also don't have a lot of land to sacrifice schooling in the field this time of year and I have no arena.
I love her to peices she has such an amazing personality and has done a lot of activities with the previous owner but I am also worried she won't sell and don't want her to be sold on and on and on.
She would suit an experienced teenager who is out and about all the time at competitions willing to spend the time on her she needs and deserves in which I can no longer give as I am Looking after my brother. I am 19 but also feel i am slightly too bog for her. she is a compact 16.1 and j am 10 stone and 5ft 7/8. She needs a school where she can be ridden as much as possible not when the weather permits like I have to ATM.
I just don't know what to do. I love her to peices. Keeping her as a project just won't do as I cannot afford to keep a horse I don't feel is right for me.
Thanks to people who get this far :)
 
You do sound like you have a heck of a lot happened and a lot on your plate, and that an easier horse may be better. Its no shame to admit you don't enjoy her as much as you'd like, this is your hobby...

I would think about selling her. If you're worried that she hasn't done enough, could she be loaned to a college or RS for the winter to get some proper work into her, then sell her in Spring?
 
You are having a very tough time, and I suspect that because all that is going in your life have lost your nerve a little? Could you put her out on loan for a year, whilst you get it altogether again, and then have her back when you are more settled and can enjoy her again?
 
I suppose I could try and put her out on loan...I would just be worried sick if anything happened to her. Well ideally she would be sold, so that I can have some money for her and then try and get my life on track to then buy something that is probably more appropriate for myself. I have emailed the previous owner and she has said she would have her back but she doesn't have the money to buy her back, and that she found her a really good honest horse but then said it is most likely because she was having more work with her than what I am giving her. But for the last 3 months she has say in a field, as that's when my brother accident happened. I don't want to sell her as I love her to peices but I am also struggling to hack her out so if I did ride I would have to ride in the field. And I only have just over an acre. Soupy think I am maybe just getting a bit cold feet and maybe asking too much of her? We were doing really well schooling and building up to hacking in the summer but then she had to go on box rest. Maybe I'm just having a very bad year and am just confused :/
 
Sell her on to a nice owner if that's your gut feeling. There's plenty of great riders who be a better fit and want to work her as much as she needs. Then she would be happier to.

Sometimes you just need a horse who is a good fit for where you are at the moment. You have enough stress going on in your life, so why not get a nice horse you can chill out on and who doesn't need constant work like your current one. One you can just relax and enjoy and not worry about.
 
Could you get a sharer to ride her while you get yourself and your family repsonsibilities into a routine? You are obviously having a very diificult time and this is probably not the best atmosphere to be making long-term decisions in. A sharer would give you a bit of breathing space and help to keep your mare exercised, so that when you are able to ride she ouwld be a bit easier to just 'get on and go'.
 
Sell her on to a nice owner if that's your gut feeling. There's plenty of great riders who be a better fit and want to work her as much as she needs. Then she would be happier to.

Sometimes you just need a horse who is a good fit for where you are at the moment. You have enough stress going on in your life, so why not get a nice horse you can chill out on and who doesn't need constant work like your current one. One you can just relax and enjoy and not worry about.

Ditto, exactly my thoughts, Paddi22. Hope you get sorted. xx
 
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