Whats wrong with my ad - Please Help !

L

Lizzie66

Well-Known Member
Joined
30 July 2008
Messages
665
Visit site
http://www.horsemart.co.uk/advert/13_yrs_15_0_hh_skewbald_shropshire/54548

I advertised my daughters pony nearly 3 weeks ago on ebay, and I've just reduced the asking price from £3450 o.n.o. to £2995 (if you put it on at £3000 it doesn't come up on the £2-£3k search !).

We've only had two calls, and one person come to try him. it was a teenager just getting back into riding after a bad experience. He didn't put a foot wrong, she tried him on the flat, over jumps, down the lane on his own and then watched my daughter take him out on the main road in traffic.

They said they liked him, and would let us know. They rang to say that they had also looked at one closer to home (we were just over 2hrs away) with their instructor and subject to vetting had decided to go for this other one, but if it failed the vet, they would come back to us, as they had liked ours very much as well.

So what is wrong with the ad, why are we not getting calls. The redundancy threat is now over, so I don't have to sell but my daughter is wanting to move on horses.

Please help ! Thanks.
 
nothing is selling at the moment, I have a lovely pony for sale very cheap and no interest - I will grass keep her over the winter and break her next spring.....i am not bloody giving her away...
 
Maybe the lack of money people have but forgive me for saying so the ad sounds a little fussy,i would word it differently.


I would maybe say

sad sale of beloved family friend due to my daughter wishing to carry on riding career on larger rides.[due to the fact he is 15hh so is a horse]
Has done [everything you listed] would excell at dressage,consistant flowing paces.
Soft mouth ridden in happy mouth,proven lateral movements.
A dream to hack,enjoys pleasure ride,good for farrier,box,clip ?????????????????????????????? [if he is does not state]

I would not put he is pretty consistant through his paces into and out of fences as it sounds a little as if your questioning it.

And i find it off putting when its stated that loosing jobs etc forces the sale as i personally would feel awkward about going to view something if i did not like it and gettign the hopes up of someoen in a sh1tty position with money,and it would put me off viewing it.


Lovely horse though like it alot.
 
Actually Amy, I think your ad is a bit too... ermmm cheesy...
tongue.gif
The bit about 'beloved family friend' is a bit over the top and would make ME (cynical hag that I am) think the seller insincere.

I would cut it down to basics though;

"Sad sale of my daughter's horse. Forward going but safe, uncomplicated ride with excellent paces. Snaffle-mouthed. Loves jumping but would also do well at dressage. Hacks out alone or in company, no vices, good to catch, shoe, clip and load
Has done PC camp, PC ODE's and funrides
Measured at just over 15h.
18 month old Bates close contact GP saddle by separate negotiation, all other rugs and tack included."

Haven't sold a horse in a while though
grin.gif
 
I only added the following "fussier" bits tonight, maybe I should take them back out?

The pace into a jump was because the people who came to try him asked about this

The excellent was meant to refer to the catch, shoe and clip as well, thought it looked a bit odd to keep repeating it, but maybe I should try and connect them a bit better.

He is an absolute darling, his only slight issue is with hunting as he does tend to get a little excited when out with hounds. It was fine when we travelled him back with others, but no one on the yard hunts anymore so we decided it was fairer to only take him when he could be hacked home. So this combined with finances being a little restricted (not as bad as they would have been if the redundancy had happened), as well as her going into GCSE's and the fact she has been offered a friends horse to ride, made us think we should advertise him. If I changed threatened redundancy to change of circumstances, do you think that might be better ?

Thanks for your feedback
 
Ad looks fine to me,would just take out the bottom lines were it says photos dont do him justice etc...he is flying those fences
smile.gif

Sadly nothing is shifting atm,if you lower price he will go!
Because he is 15hh you cant really put daughter needs to move onto horses,i would maybe add daughter has grown alot and needs to move onto 16hh
smile.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
I like PFs version of the ad
smile.gif


[/ QUOTE ]


well pants to you mrs
tongue.gif
and i was so nice about your hotness shame on you
grin.gif
 
The reason I didn't lower the price is that everyone is trying to knock prices down anyway, so I advertised him originally at £3,450 ono with saddle as extra, but I was prepared to let him and the saddle go for that. I've dropped the price now to £2,995 and don't really want to go much lower as I believe he is worth it.

Now I'm not being made redundant I don't have to sell him, although having made the decision to sell and advertised him I feel it would be better if we could sell him now, otherwise we have to go through all the shall we shan't we process again ! (It's taken me 6 months to get this far !)
 
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I like PFs version of the ad
smile.gif


[/ QUOTE ]


well pants to you mrs
tongue.gif
and i was so nice about your hotness shame on you
grin.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

Don't make me cross Amy!! As well as being mean I'm also in pain and cranky so you've got to be nice to me!!
tongue.gif

I do agree GinaB is very very pretty indeed though (that's meant in a totally non-pervy way, BTW
tongue.gif
tongue.gif
tongue.gif
)
grin.gif
 
Horses are selling in general but well below their actual worth price! A horse on my yard went to his new home yesterday, a fab horse, easily worth £5000 plus but the owner had to drop the asking price to £4250 and even then I think he went for £4000!

With regard to the ad, it sounds fine, I'd possibly take out the last bit about photos not doing him justice and the good home bit, you can ensure that when the people actually come to see him. Good luck.
 
I don't agree that nothing is selling. I recently sold a mare for the asking price and could have sold her several times over.
I honestly think people are looking for a bargain though and though I think your daughter's horse is easily worth what you are asking, people see 13 year old and immediately think it won't be worth much especially if they need to sell on in a year or two.
Try PC website, sounds like a perfect PC pony to me especially if he can squeeze into 148cm.
Good luck, I think he looks fab.
 
In this market, to get big numbers of viewers, he's too old for that money unless you can prove that he wins stuff. Sorry, but I bought a six year old stunning black 16.3 Irish Sports Horse for that this spring and the horse market is always hotter earlier in spring than at the end of the school holidays.

He is "worth" only what a buyer thinks he is worth. If you want him to sell you have to get ideas of what <u>you</u> think he is worth out of your head.

Your best bet is contacts who know him already spreading the word to friends and acquaintances. Offer them a decent commission if he sells via their contact.

I'm an experienced buyer/seller, by the way.
 
I have just read my post again, and I must have been extremely dippy last night, as he is definitely NOT on ebay.

He was advertised on Horemart.

Unfortunatley it is too late to edit my first post !
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top