When to call time for an old boy?

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Jesstickle

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I don't often post in here but it seemed The most relevant place. My old lad is 16 now. He has been stiff for a while but it has been manageable. He has a heart murmur too. Yesterday he had a bit of a funny turn (according to mother as he doesn't live with me these days) and kept wobbling over. Apparantly he seemed very confused and laid in his bed most of the day. I've come home tonight to check up on him. He is very wobbly on his feet and is obviously struggling to get up and down. He seems subdued to me too. I really think it is time to let the old fellow go but my parents are like children and want to see hoe he goes. I am happy to give him a couple of days bu don't see him suddenly bouncing back to better than he was before his moment and I don't want to leave it too long and see him suffer. Vet is coming out tomorrow but think they will just say what the always say, he is very old and all we can do is manage him. Sorry, am rambling on. Just don't want to talk my folks into it if its the wrong decision.
 
I think most people in here will agree, you'll know the time. And it's better a day to early than a day too late.

Sucks to make the decision. I just did that for my 17 year old girlie back in September. It just plain old sucks.

<<hugs>>
 
I think it is probably time. Parents disagree. Well my stepfather dors. He doesn't deal with this sort of thing well. I think i'll suggest we book the vet for next week, treat him like a prince and then let him go. Sigh.
 
It sounds to me as if you know your lad and feel he has had enough. :( I have been there far too many times and it is a horrible decision to make but as PucciNPoni says, better a day too soon. (hugs)
 
Mum is fine. She's always had dogs, cats, horses and knows the score. Stepdad never had pets until we came along so he finds letting them go very difficult. Ultimately it's my say so but I don't want to alienate him or upset him. Why are people so difficult hey? Thanks for the kind words. I appreciate it :)
 
Its always the men isnt it who cant bear to make the decision and hoping the poor old dog dies in his sleep.

I have my friends old dog staying with me at the moment on all sorts of meds but its obvious its time to call it a day, I know it my friend knows it but convincing her husband isnt easy. The dog was taken to the vet the other day who upped his meds and cleaned out his anal glands but the dog has a huge mobility problem and whilst that might have made life easier for him it was only the tip of the iceberg. My friends husband thinks because the dog is still eating and wagging his tail he cant be that bad. When I had my old Dobe PTS he was far more mobile than this dog and I definately did the right thing for my dog.

I hope for yours and your dogs sake your father sees sense and makes the right decision.
 
Don't worry dobiegirl. It's my decision and i know what I think. It really is just a case of whether it's tomorrow or later in the week I think. It is strange how men seem to struggle more. I do love the old boy though. He'll be much missed.
 
Apologies for misunderstanding, thats good it sounds like you will know the right time. I do sympathise, with my old dog I rang the vet 3 times to book him to come out and I swear that dog heard and perked up because I cancelled the appointments. It came to the day after the 4th appointment and he never perked up so knew I was doing the right thing.Its a horrible horrible decision to make but also one of the kindest things we can do for our dogs.
 
I am so sorry you are facing this difficult decision with the added problem of your stepfather. I think you know the right thing to do, when you have animals you always seem to know, but it never makes it any easier. Go with your gut feeling, your heart will break but you know what the best thing is for your boy. And if you have a good vet he will be supportive and make it easier for you.

Think of you, my heart breaks for you ((((mega hugs)))) xx
 
They normally tell you in their eyes and it sounds as if you already know - my mother left it about two years to long with one of her girls and it still haunts her.

Maybe try to explain that dogs do not live for the future, they live in the here and now, they do not understand why they hurt or are tired or can't run around like they used to, they can't understand why they cannot get up at all, all they do is feel it, it is confusing and upsetting for them.

Hope your step-dad comes round and you can all enjoy the time you have left with him xxx
 
Thanks all. As predicted breaking the news that it will be tomorrow ended up in a stand up row and now my mother is bawling downstairs and the parentals are hardly speaking. Poor dog is better off out of this mad house!
 
The vet has been out and apparently he's had a minor stroke and will be fine. Despite the fact that three weeks ago he fell over and couldn't get up and that was before it even happened and I know it wasn't the first time he's done it either. I don't suppose my parents mentioned that to the vet mind you. I just absolutely despair. I told them the vet won't advise them PTS because they aren't allowed and all they're going to be able to do is offer treatment. Perhaps I am wrong thinking that he has had enough but he can't sit any more, he is either up or down, he can't scratch himself properly any more and so he's terribly itchy and yet again his ears are infected and need ear drops which he hates. And to make it worse the vet has said the dog has probably got a good year left in him. Which he hasn't. He's deteriorated a lot in the last six months and if he carries on at the rate he's been going he'll have zero quality of life in a year. Not my vet I should add. I know what mine would have said. My parents are going to grab that and hold on to it so damn tight. What a hopelessly irresponsible thing to say. He has no idea how long the dog will last! Grr.
 
That vet has just made things a whole lot worse, my horse vet tells it like it is and it took me a long while to find a similar dog vet. Why is it some vets tell you when an animal has had enough and another offers other treatment. Your parents vet must have a crystal ball if he can tell the dog has another year left in him, I dont envy you in this situation.

Is it possible to get your parents to see another vet.?
 
Probably not. I'm sure the vet would be more straight with me and I'm very tempted to ring and ask to speak to him. He's a lovely chap but very soft and a tad hysterical and faced with my mother bawling and bellowing and not wanting to make the decision I can see how easy it is to say what he's said. And perhaps he genuinely believes the dog's quality of life is ok. I don't really think that and have been saying to the OH for a few months now that I think we'll have to let him go sooner rather than later as he's been on a fairly steep decline.

I don't really know what to do tbh. I've never had an easy relationship with my stepfather and if I put my foot down it's going to cause a huge rift with my poor mother in the middle. I know for a fact that if he weren't there she would go with what I say. Yesterday she totally agreed that it wasn't fair to go through another round of treatment for his ears at this point in his life, and that it wasn't ok that he would fall and be unable to get up but unfortunately she just tends to do what she is told by her rather domineering partner.

Sorry, I am prattling on. I feel much better for writing it all down though. I hope no one minds me sounding off :( I think I will try and speak to the vet and just check that he is getting the full picture. I really could do without this frankly. My horse has been teetering on the edge of the bullet all year, I have finally fixed her and now I have to deal with my irritating parentals. Family hey, who'd have them?
 
You are going through a rough time atm but I think your idea of speaking to the vet yourself is a good one. Hearing it first hand and being able to put questions in a lucid manner without emotion will be probabley easier for the vet to answer.

Good luck and let us know how you get on and you are not sounding off ,we all mostly have had to make this awful decision and bearing in mind your family situation it has made it tens times harder.
 
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