Why do people take the soft option?

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Penniless

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Having being forced to downsize our yard of horses due to personal ill-health, I have been advertising our young horses for sale and also our top horse for loan with a view to buy. What I want to know is why people, having made two visits to see each of the horses (except the 3 year old who hasn't even had an enquiry about her and has been a winner every time shown), and who say they are definitely having them, then when transport arrangements etc have all been made, do I log on in the evening to find that they've changed their minds and have told me by email. Why can't they have the decency to pick the phone up and tell me to my face so to speak.

I've heard one was backing out via this forum, didn't get to hear from her personally until I read an email from her after discovering it on this forum and who still hasn't had the decency to say sorry; then another potential buyer backed out with the excuse her friend had broken her arm and so she was now going to ride her friends horse; and then today we get an email (having spent the past week paying for someone to get my horse back to work and riding out on the roads etc) saying that our horse is too good for her.

Email is a really good thing for those who aren't brave enough or have the courtesy to contact a Vendor direct.

Sorry to let off steam, but I'm fuming over this again, we've wasted so much time over the past few weeks. I wouldn't mind, but we are so honest about all of our horses that everyone who views them gets told everything about them, and we've welcomed every potential Purchaser to the yard whenever they've wanted to - even allowing all the family to visit the horses as well so that their mum and dad, or the kids get to know what they're buying. We're beginning to wonder if there are genuine buyers out there, or are they just all coming for a nose around and a free ride each time.

The same also applies to our horse box we've got for sale - pretty sure a few of them have just turned up for a drive around! They know the price we've got the box up for sale at, so why after inspecting it, driving it and telling us how nice it is, do they then tell us they've only got half the money to be able to buy it! Rant over - but no-one here to vent my frustration out on - so thanks for listening!
 
I think its the nature of the horse industry, there are a lot of day trippers!

Its also human nature, when you say you want a horse and go home and think again, its hard for people to pick up the phone and say well I dont anymore, I've rethought and I was too quick in making a decision - so you get the emails and the laughable excuses as to why they can't proceed.

Its so frustrating I know, and impossible to tell apart the genuine buyers from the dreamers.

If you need to sell, you've just gotta keep plugging away I'm afraid, but you will get there in the end.

Unfortunately its not a great time to sell, but the clocks go forward soon and spring is on its way so hopefully the market will pick up x
 
Because people are cowards and wasting honest people's time is their hobby!! Selling horses is heart-breaking enough without people like that making it an emotional roller coaster. Why is it also that when people inquire about the horse initially they email you about 20 times with questions- why can't they just pick up the phone and get all the info they need in 10 mins??!! :confused:
 
Really hope you find some genuine buyers soon....seems very odd, especially the ones trying out your box (chancers!). I can't imagine anything worse than travelling about trying out strange horses. I'm looking at the minute and won't even see stuff that doesn't seem to fit the bill completely on the phone - far to worried about people seeing my shocking riding!
 
You are right it is common courtesy to call and I would if in that position. However, there may be people who are possibly afraid of saying that after taking the time to think about find that the horse may not be the right one for them. Sometimes when you call to say this the vendor can put the hard sale on and try and push you into it, then you are left feeling like you have to buy a horse you don't feel is right for you. I get your frustration but I do believe in two sides to every story.
 
I am afraid it is human nature and many people these days communicate via texts and email. It is just as bad for buyers. On Sunday I drove for two hours to see a horse that had clearly not been brushed for a year. It's mane was full of dreadlocks. This paragon was £7k.
 
As someone has already mentioned, many 'horsey' people are day trippers. I also think in general many people lack common courtesy.
Good luck in finding your horses homes :)
 
With selling anything, I do think some people are time wasters, lack courtesy, etc etc, however, I was selling my pony last year, and had a buyer (who incidentally hadn't seen the mare, but def wanted her.)
Due to a change in MY circumstances, I had to cancel the sale, so DIDN'T take the soft option and email the buyer. Instead I did the decent thing and called her as soon as I knew I wasn't selling.
I explained down to the finer points why I couldn't sell-genuine reasons for any 'normal' person-, for my courtesy I got absolutely blasted down the phone, buyer saying how I wasn't a genuine person, and no-one should trust me, in fact she was downright horrible, and I came off the phone very upset.
She then followed this up with an email to me, basically saying the same things (which I deleted as it made me so upset-anyone who knows me would know I am not what she was saying!)
My point is this, that alot of people would take the easy option, and not speak to the other party themselves, possibly for fear of getting the same sort of treatment.
I thought I was doing the right thing by contacting the buyer by phone. I will think twice the next time.....
 
I agree it is frustrating when you are selling horses or horseboxes and your hopes are raised with each enquiry / viewing, only to find out..... or not find out that the potential purchaser isn't interested. However I have also had bad experiences when looking to buy. Last year I went to see a horsebox in gloucester and thought it was great. It was only when I checked the floor that I realised that it had serious problems. I politely said to the owner that it wasn't quite what I was looking for and she had a complete meltdown......she was so rude it was horrible. Some people just won't let you back away graciously!
 
Its very hard when buying and selling my most recent horsebox i went and viewed friday night said i would take it but would come and pick it up sat morning with my dad who would look it over for me then offered deposit they declined we bought it sat morning, if they had sold it before i got back i would have understood.

When buying horses i am probably your dream buyer am there a little a time a possible usually know as soon as i see it if i want the horse and if sound and as described i buy it often take the horsebox with me to view. However i do get lots of pictures and ask all relevant questions, people can get too bogged down and confused when looking and fear plays a part everyone is worried they are going to get scammed nowadays.

I think i am a fair seller but when selling the last horse i did did upset a couple of people by turning them down when they wanted to buy the horse as i thought it would not be a good match.

What i always say when the people get there to view a horse if i am selling is,
If there is anything about the horse you dont like or if at any time during the viewing you feel the horse is not for you just tell me and we can stop, i will not be offended in any way at all and it will save us both time if the horse is not the one for you.
I always say this in a light way making it clear i mean this and it will not be a problem if they do this and making it clear i will not feel they have wasted my time by doing so.

Its funny from reading on here how people view horses who do everything asked then still dont buy that is thier choice and you should never be annoyed at them but i think they probably miss out alot on a good horse.

I often buy horses to bring on and sell and if i travel a long way or go to a sale the price of diesel and my time i alaways buy if there is a sound decent horse available and sometimes some of the ones that at first dont seem the ones i would be most drawn to or the most stand out ones can be the ones that turn in to the most outstanding stunning little superstars.

Its a funny old thing buying but its even more stressing selling, the best thing you can do is just chill accept you are going to have viewings not all will buy and before you know it someone will.

Good luck.
 
totaly understand your frustration ..........

however I am one of those honest people and will say, no I dont like this or no it wont work and flippin heck the verbal abuse I have been given because of it!

I went to look at one horse, I knew straight away she was not suitable, so I turned around and said "I am sorry to waste your time, but she is not what I am looking for" well stone me I got F'ed off the yard :p
 
there are lots of time wasters, day trippers and rude people out there. the last time i sold a horse i had one couple come twice (from miles away), he was absolutely perfectly behaved, they said he was ideal and they definitely wanted him... and then they never called again. really frustrating.
all i can say is that the right people come along eventually, as long as you don't go nuts in the meantime! my horse went to a friend who is over the moon with him, he has a super life and she adores him. sometimes things are just not meant to be at that time, but will be later, if you see what i mean. hope your luck changes soon.
 
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