Worried what others think of my riding

[P0ny Lover]

Hi! I'm a young beginner-ish rider who takes group lessons. I am at the point where I am being offered to canter during my leasons, and i want to but i always say no. I have this fear that others from my leason will judge because I'm inexperienced in cantering and wont be very good at it. Is there any other people who experience this, how do i get over this fear?

 

[Lois Lame]

Just remember that whenever a person points the finger, that person has three fingers pointed back at them.

 

[SilverLinings]

I think that you need to see cantering in lessons as a positive thing, rather than a potential negative. Remember that NOBODY gets good at anything without doing it lots of times. Other people in the lessons who you think are better at cantering than you are only more competent because they have done it more times. They won't expect someone who hasn't done enough to 'get it' straight away. Anything new can be a bit scary when you do it for the first time, but if it is something that you want to do then you need to get on and do it, then do it again and again until you become proficient. Learning should be fun, and overcoming something you were worried about will make you feel great.

With regards to the actual cantering, remember to sit up, keep your heels down and your legs still, and try to absorb the movement of the gait through your hips/lower back. And relax, you will find it more comfortable than if you are tense. Canter is easier and more comfortable to sit to than trot, so if you've already done some sitting trot then you should find canter relatively easy

I hope that you feel able to canter in your next lesson, and that you enjoy it

 

[Dave's Mam]

Everyone starts somewhere. Could you do a private lesson for your first canter?

 

[SilverLinings]

Everyone starts somewhere. Could you do a private lesson for your first canter?

That's an excellent idea

 

[Esmae]

You have to start somewhere. Don't worry about other people, just have a go and then just keep on keeping on and you will improve at most things in life, including a right rollicking canter. Good luck.

 

[Glitter's fun]

I came on to say, can you book a couple of private cantering lessons, then I see someone already said that!
It won't take many, just until you get over it being new.

If you are in a group lesson the others might seem very confident to you but they will actually be at about the same level as you or the instructor wouldn't have put you all together. So once you have had your private lessons go back with your head held high & say "oh yes, I canter"!

 

[cauda equina]

If your instructor thinks you are ready to canter, then you are ready
Never mind what other people in your lesson think - presumably they are beginners or thereabouts themselves, so probably not in a position to make informed judgements

 

[Skib]

Forget the other people. Most riders are frightened of their first canter.
If the RI thinks you are ready, it is worth asking whether you are taught to canter from walk or from trot?
If it is from trot, can you ride sitting trot? When asking a horse to canter, you normally ride a few steps of sitting trot, so learn sitting trot first.
It isnt an up and down movement, more a side to side one as one's hip will fall as the hind leg of the horse on that side comes off the ground.
However, many riding schools teach the first canter in a private lesson and that might be a good idea in your case, if you are worried about the other students.
I have watched group lessons in which children line up, waiting their turn to canter and I dont think I could have learned that way. To canter one needs to breathe and relax and think the 3 time rhythm of canter, allowing the horse to flo forward between ones legs.

 

[starbucker]

Everyone is too busying worrying about themselves to worry about how others look 90% of the time

 

[HopOnTrot]

According to psychologists, learning comes in 4 stages:
Unconscious incompetence: you don’t know how bad you are.
Conscious incompetence: you know you’re bad
Conscious competence: you have to work at being good
Unconscious competence: you don’t have to think about being good.

Congratulations you are at stage 2! You’ve made progress and now you know you need to work on it, smile and enjoy your cantering!

 

[Identityincrisis]

Hi! I'm a young beginner-ish rider who takes group lessons. I am at the point where I am being offered to canter during my leasons, and i want to but i always say no. I have this fear that others from my leason will judge because I'm inexperienced in cantering and wont be very good at it. Is there any other people who experience this, how do i get over this fear?

I have been riding for 35 years and still don’t like riding in front of people!

We all have to start somewhere but I understand your nerves, how about a few private lessons

 

[dreamcometrue]

@P0ny Lover i think you will be fine cantering in the lesson and your pony will know what to do so you just have to concentrate on sitting the canter and keeping a good position which you already know from the lessons you have had. Canter is lovely to ride and easier than rising trot! All you have to do is say yes next time and have a go and you will have overcome that worry. There is a good reason why everyone loves cantering!

Good luck and enjoy it!

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

The only opinion of your riding that matters is that of the horse, closely followed by that of your RI. The RI obviously thinks you are ready to canter, the horse won't know until you try.

 

[paddi22]

i used to be similar when i was young and very self conscious riding in front of people, I would just get in my own head and freeze up.

an instructor said something to me which I thought was really harsh at the time but it really helped. It was along the lines of how i'd never impress her with my riding and that it wasn't the point to please her. And that people watching either wouldn't care, would be rooting for me or would pick fault regardless of how well I did. so why bother with them? and that they were entitled to think whatever they wanted about my riding, it was none of my business. Basically just to put my focus on the only thing I can control, which was my body, my mind and the movement I was doing on the horse.

if you are starting cantering you WON"T be very good at it, so why worry?!. it takes people ages to get a good canter seat, 40 years on I'm STILL learning it. The best you can learn is just to enjoy the journey and enjoy making mistakes and learning. It might be worthwhile to get some books on growth mindset and look into concepts like 'beginners mind' which teach you to just enjoy the process of learning.

 

[Polos Mum]

Those that matter don't mind and those that mind don't matter.

I keep that in my head when doing something out of my comfort zone. Those that support me will encourage me no matter how bad the first few goes at something new are.
those that critisise I will do my best not to care about their opinion.

 

[FieldOrnaments]

In my experience people are too busy fretting about what others think of them to be thinking about you, or anyone else for that matter!

 

[Lucky Snowball]

Private lesson is a good suggestion, but if not then brave pants and have a go! Give us all a happy update once you’ve had a canter.

 

[poiuytrewq]

You'll be surprised canter is easier by miles than trotting. Give it a go and i guarentee you'll be smiling after! Presumably being in a group lesson your all roughly the same level any way and probably all thinking the same thing!

 

[Clodagh]

I absolutely sympathise. I hate doing things I’m bad at and I’m 55. It’s easier as you get older as you gradually stop caring what people think.
In the meantime, fake it until you make it. Make yourself do it, if you look like an eejit then so be it. You won’t look like one though, honestly. Have faith in yourself.

 

[Trouper]

If we were all good at doing things the first time we would not need instructors and they would all be out of work.

If you've mastered trot you will find cantering easier - as others have said the trick is to relax and let your body absorb the movement. Think of it as sitting back into a comfortable armchair - that rocks!!

 

[gunnergundog]

Everyone gets on a horse and walks it for the first time - likewise everyone trots for the first time and then canters and even jumps for the first time. You’ve obviously successfully accomplished the first two - congratulations! It’s more than many do, so you’re already streets ahead of those. Now it’s time for the next step! A lunge lesson may give you the confidence you’re seeking; it’s you, the horse and your instructor and nobody else! Your instructor has control of the horse so all you have to do is enjoy the rocking chair sensation! Go for it! Let us know how you get on.

 

[eahotson]

Everyone starts somewhere. Could you do a private lesson for your first canter?

Good idea.

 

[AthenesOwl]

It’s normal to feel a little anxious about riding in front of other people, and even more so when doing something for the first time. Would you be able to have a private lesson to try cantering for the first time?

If not, just remember that the others in your lesson were where you are once too, and probably not that long ago. Even people who have been riding for a long time sometimes have bumps in the road and find cantering difficult for a while and need to build their confidence.

Your instructor obviously thinks you’re ready, but perhaps it’s worth mentioning to your instructor that you’re worried about cantering for the first time in front of others in your lesson.

 

[Wishfilly]

I agree with others that a private lesson may be the answer- summer holidays are coming up, so perhaps you can have a lesson in the week? Depending on your Riding School, another option MAY be to go for a hack with an instructor and canter along a track with them- I know one place that is able to offer this on their own land, and it's a great way to learn to canter!

I would also talk to your instructor about how you are feeling, if you can- they may have some other solutions!

 

[ThreeFurs]

Great suggestions from Wishfilly. You may feel safer in an arena, but if your outside, with an instructor, it can be easier getting the feel of canter if your going a little bit uphill. That 'push - pop' from the hind end is less emphasised.

Alternatively, you can, if there's one in your area, have your first canter on one of these amazing things!

 

[SpotsandBays]

Private lesson is a good option.
You might not be good at cantering initially, but you’re not going to be “bad at it”. Being inexperienced in something doesn’t mean you’re bad at it.
Everyone starts somewhere. I’m sure all of the other people there will have felt the exact same way you did when they did their first canter, and your instructor will have seen it all before with many many many different riders.
If your instructor thinks you are ready, then give it a try! It will feel odd and messy because it’s a gait you haven’t felt before. If you decide you’re not ready after that then that’s fine, but you’ll have made that first step and I’m sure the next time you try again it will be a little easier. Good luck and let us know how you get on!