WWYD if...

[Dumbo]

What would you do if you had your dream horse on loan, but then he was diagnosed with a condition that meant he wouldn't be capable of what you wanted to do?
Would you keep, spend money and time on him, and come to terms that you'll never be doing more than quiet hacking?
Or would you return to owner and look for something that you could have fun on but realise you'll never find anything as wonderful as loan horse?

It's a head and heart debate.....

 

[Batgirl]

I am quite hard hearted, I would return the horse

 

[Nudibranch]

I think only you can answer that. Not identical but my rising 4yo has been diagnosed with DJD despite being in every other way the perfect horse. He is now being treated; his ridden future is not certain but he can now start the backing process as he has started treatment. I would never sell and am lucky in that I have another to ride, and have them at home so I can keep him forever. Maybe I am soft but I took the view that he is my responsibility alone therefore I do whatever it takes to keep him pain free and with a good quality of life. I will not sell.
I am sorry to hear about yours..I suppose it depends on circumstances and how much you are prepared to potentially give up.

 

[YorksG]

I think it would depend on a few factors:-
1. why I was loaning rather than owning
2. what the condition was and whether I had any responsibility for it happening/worsening
3. what I actually wanted/was capable of doing with the horse and whether there was a chance of it doing that.
4how many loans I was prepared to take on and potentially return if the horse wasn't ideal.

 

[Cinnamontoast]

Depends how much you love the horse, can you afford another, what would happen if it went back to the owner? Mine's currently out of work, probably won't be more than a happy hack, may be ok for inhand shows, but he's mine and I'd find it impossible to sell. Different if it's not yours, I suppose.

Why is it your dream horse?

 

[be positive]

I think it would depend on a few factors:-
1. why I was loaning rather than owning
2. what the condition was and whether I had any responsibility for it happening/worsening
3. what I actually wanted/was capable of doing with the horse and whether there was a chance of it doing that.
4how many loans I was prepared to take on and potentially return if the horse wasn't ideal.

I would also add to this list whether I had insured the horse as by sending it back you would be handing a horse back to the owner that they could not take out insurance on to treat whatever the problem is, I think morally unless the horse came with the condition or the owner had kept the insurance going in their name I would want to at least try and get the horse right so it could go onto another less ambitious home.

 

[Goldenstar]

That's the big advantage of loaning you don't have to have the long term responsibility for an impaired horse .
It's does not mean I would be strong enough to do send him back.
I think for me it would depend on the circumstances of his owner .

 

[TattygareMare]

I was in this situation. I loaned a 16 year old mare that had evented all her life, I had her for a couple of years. She taught me the ropes and was my absolute dream horse. She then developed various problems and was recommended 6 months to a year off work.

I convinced myself I would keep her for this time (her owner had moved abroad) and pray that she came right as I owed it to her, but after lengthy discussions with friends and family I had to let my head rule. Her owner was absolutely fine about this. (I had always been open and honest with her, and although she never bothered me, I gave her weekly updates of what we has been up to and always made sure she knew she was welcome anytime.) She knew it was not anything i had done as she openly admitted the horse had had a very hard working life.

It was devastating giving her up, but she went to her owner's friend and took the time off she needed with no treatment. She is back in light ridden work now and as happy as larry.

If I had kept her I would have spent a fortune on vets bills and treatment, livery and the rest all for a giant lawn mower. I decided that if I was prepared to spend all that money on someone elses horse, then I could start to think about buying my own...Which I did. I couldnt bear the heartache of giving another horse back.

Im glad I didnt keep her, even if I hadn't been lucky enough to buy my own horse. I work so hard all week to be able to afford the thing that makes me happiest. You have to ask yourself if you want to put all that hard work and money into something you are getting little reward out of.

You may think you wont find something as wonderful as your loan horse, but there are lots out there. The best ones are loaned out and not sold BECAUSE they are the good ones!

 

[Thriller]

What would you do if you had your dream horse on loan, but then he was diagnosed with a condition that meant he wouldn't be capable of what you wanted to do?
Would you keep, spend money and time on him, and come to terms that you'll never be doing more than quiet hacking?
Or would you return to owner and look for something that you could have fun on but realise you'll never find anything as wonderful as loan horse?

It's a head and heart debate.....

I have literally just been in this exact situation, down to every detail. i gave horse back and got another on loan, to have fun on and she turned out to be a psycho. I'm currently horseless.

I would not be paying to keep a horse i could not ride on loan tbh unless it was a companion and VERY cheap .

 

[Dumbo]

Thank you all for the responses..
I own a TB as well and adore him too however he's 16 and so badly educated (I rescued him 2 yrs ago) so he won't be much more than a hack either. I dabble in intro dressage with him but have come to terms that he'll never take me round a Sj course safely and a prelim dressage is a ways off yet!
The horse on loan is my dream horse simply because he's the kindest, safest, easiest horse I've ever met in 18 years of horses. He has a couple of quirks but manageable. He'll turn his hoof to anything - I had so many plans for us this year.

We haven't yet had a diagnosis but I've had people suggest the dreaded N word or something else sinister in the hoof. He's evented up to novice with owner and was loaned to me as he couldn't continue with that lifestyle however suitable for riding club/unaffiliated, low level competition. Owner blamed that on old tendon injury. I had had a couple of jumping lessons and been working him a bit more in the run up to him going lame so in my head there is something underlying that has flared up due to him doing a bit more.
I have everything crossed that the diagnosis isn't as bad but I'm almost certain it will be.
I can only afford 2 horses so I'm trying to work out how happy I'd be keeping 2 that won't be able to get out and about but I'd be absolutely devastated to have to part with him.

 

[soulfull]

Obviously get a diagnosis first, but sounds like he already had something going on so definitely send him back.

There are other horses like him out there, yes I know they are not easy to find but you will find one

 

[MS123]

I am quite hard hearted, I would return the horse

I would too. Different situation but I had my girl on loan and she went back to her owner when I decided to travel/experience life outside of horses. Ultimately though, a large part of me couldn't shrug off knowing I was putting so much work/time into a horse that would never be mine, and I think that had a huge part to play in me giving her back.

OP what does the owner think?

 

[Dumbo]

OP what does the owner think?

Owner doesn't seem particularly fussed tbh.
I give her regular updates and photos which she says she's grateful for. I sent her an email the day we first noticed the lameness to which she was sorry to hear and then sent her another email a few days later to say he wasn't much better, vet due out etc and never heard back....!

 

[misskk88]

Don't panic until you have an answer and diagnosis from the vet. There could be a range of symptoms and people could give you a range of answers as to what it may be, not necessarily one of them correct. I would be keeping the owner up to date and discussing the potential scenarios (By the way, who is responsible for insurance/costs?). If you are honest with her that you are unsure whether you would want to keep the horse on, then there will be no nasty surprises for either of you.

From the other side, and as someone who is the owner and has loaned a horse who was returned as she would not hold up to serious levels of work, I completely understand the predicament you are in. I held them in high regard because they were honest with me, and wanted to put the horses welfare before their own ambitions and requirements. You took the horse on with the view to be certain competing/levels of riding. One of the perks of loaning is that, if and when you decide to return the horse, you can do so, for whatever reason, including if the horse is not suitable for the original intended purposes. As an owner this is a risk we take, although we would hope it was under genuine circumstances, and as with your loan horse it appears that perhaps the issues of unsoundness are something lurking that needs further investigation.

Personally if I were loaning, and paying for a horse as if it were my own, I would want something that could cope with what I wanted to do. Especially if I already own my very own broken one! It really depends though on how negotiable you are with certain aspects i.e I would like something on loan that could pop a small course of fences, but it is the least of my priorities as I don't particularly enjoy it. The current horse I share is more dressage orientated and previous injury and age dictates no jumping which suits me, but may not suit others sharers.

Speak with the owner. Get a diagnosis. And then go from there.

 

[FairyLights]

I have always gone with what the horse wants and put my own ambitions on the back burner if necessary.

 

[southerncomfort]

If you decide to keep him you have to face the reality that you could spend a fortune on vets fees and treatments but the owner could still ask for him back at any time. That's the reality of loaning I'm afraid.

It's your choice, but if it were me I'd be sending the horse home. x

 

[Kikke]

I would say, if you can't do what you want it is not you dream horse anymore!
I am sure you are very emotionally invested in the horse making it very difficult.
Horses give enough worries in our lives without being not what we what from them so why give youself even more worries. I am sure the horse may well be a dream horse for someone else so you can loan or buy a horse that gives you what you are after! (imho)

 

[Darkwater]

Is the owner going to be covering vets fees, any treatment etc that he might need or will it be down to you? Fingers firmly crossed for a positive outcome x

 

[ihatework]

Sounds like you have taken on an older horse who the owner knows is a bit creaky. If you keep him then I think you need to be very sure you are willing to accept his limitations.

13 years ago I took on a creaky 6 yo on loan/donation. I don't regret it for a minute, but by god has he been an expensive useless lawn mower for the majority of his life. He still makes my heart burst on a daily basis. Sometimes there is no logic.

 

[shadeofshyness]

Sounds like he's your dream horse because he can turn his hoof to anything - so if he can't do this any more, he's no longer your dream horse. Sad but true - unless you have the time and money for a third, I would send him back and look for another. There might be someone out there whose dream horse he will be now - a safe horse for gentle hacks.

 

[Midlifecrisis]

Dumbo what would you advise a friend in the same situation...I think you need to return horse and give your love to one that you can get out and about on as you initially intended.

 

[MS123]

I have always gone with what the horse wants and put my own ambitions on the back burner if necessary.

But did you own or loan? There's a big difference.

 

[Tobiano]

You asked WWYD. I would send the horse back, UNLESS I was worried that the owner would either PTS or let him go to an unsuitable home, in which case I would try very hard to help the owner find him another loaner who would be happy doing what he was happy doing.

 

[Firefly9410]

If I owned him I would keep him but if I was loaning I would send him back no problem. I would never spend out crazy amounts nursing and rehabilitating someone else's horse from injury or illness. The owner could take it back once recovered and then you would have done it all for nothing. Even without vet bills a horse that needed, for example: a year off, is still expensive to keep on livery when you are getting no use from the animal. Even a cheap budget kept horse will cost over a thousand or two per year on DIY livery. I would do it for my own animals but not for someone else's. I see no point in loaning and accepting the negatives which is the risk of the owner taking them back, without taking advantage of the positives which is being able to return the horse. You may as well own if that is the case.

 

[NZJenny]

I own four horses from a three year old to a 23 year old and they are all my "dream" horses.

So while you may think this horse is your one and only dream horse, it isn't. If you want to ride and can't and keeping two is not an option, time to move on.

 

[nclem]

Hello, so sorry to hear of your dilemma, but just to say I understand how you feel and what a difficult decision it is. I had the most amazing horse on loan who gave me all my confidence back after bad injury, we achieved some of my dreams if competing in para HI, but he had to retire due to problems in his knee. Heartbreaking decision between keeping but not being able to ride (unable to afford to pay extra to ride a few times a week at £20 a go, and keep my loan boy) or return him to retire with his owner. I made the decision to ask his owner to return him to retire there, and I miss him every day since but I am hopeful I can put what he taught me and the confidence e gave me to good use with the net horse who undoubtedly won't be able to live up to my one in a million loan boy hehe it's is hard, but you will know which option you prefer to live with. Maybe you can visit him if he goes back? Maybe a clean break is easier. At least you have your other one for company if he does go back good luck with your decision, sending hugs as I know how sad it can be xxx

 

[SpringArising]

I would say, if you can't do what you want it is not you dream horse anymore!

I agree with this and I'd send him back.