yes, i know I said you could borrow her.....but....

[smokey]

I keep my horse at a yard a few miles from home, only about ten of us in total. Recently I haven't had time to more than a cursory check and a feed. (anyone familiar with my previous few threads will understand!)
one of the girls there has a horse which for various reasons has been off for a while. I offered her a loan of mine if she wanted to ride, on the understanding that she just let me know what days, and she would feed her after riding. Thought it helps me, gives her a chance to ride, and gets my horse moving a bit.
she texted me last week and asked if she could hack her out. I agreed, and just asked that she fed her after.
see on fb later, pics of my girl, in the arena, with girls friend on board. She explained that friend hasn't ridden since an accident a few yrs ago. Ok, so she had a wee sit on my girl, no big deal. Then i go up to the yard next day, to be told how good my girl was for them all! Turns out she didn't hack, she had a spin round the school, friend had a few circuits, then the yard owner got on to show them how to get a 'proper' trot out of her! I then go to make a feed up, quietly seething, ti find the feed i had left for her the day before, untouched. On top of this i am then informed that she was really muddy, so they cut 3inches of tail off, as it was thick with mud.
the way things are in my personal life at present, I cant do quietly assertive, I may blow my stack! So, I said nothing, fed her myself and resolved never to do anyone a favour again.
I'm probably being over sensitive, but yard owner has hinted several times for a chance to ride her, and I've never taken her up on it. I don't normally let people ride her, and i feel she just took advantage when i wasn't about.
sorry, just a rant, if I start in real life I may find myself without a yard for her!

 

[louincrew]

I would be furious!
It's one thing letting someone ride your horse but every Tom dick Harry and cut her tail!! My gasket would have blown !
X

 

[sheep]

I'd be livid. To be honest if this happened to me I would probably go nuts as well, and would probably stop the arrangement though that is just my way and doesn't mean that it would be the right thing to do! I am not particularly precious about mine but I do like things to be done a certain way.

 

[MargotC]

I would personally find it completely unacceptable to have someone take liberties with one of my horses like that outside of what was explicitly agreed. If they can't be trusted to stick to the agreement who knows what else they might think themselves entitled to do. And to lend the horse on to another to try! Ah the nerve.

 

[Elsiecat]

I'm on the fence a little here. What I would be annoyed with is her not being fed. I'm 50/50 with the other part.

 

[Pink_Lady]

Personally I would be absolutely furious - equally so about the riding, the not feeding and the tail being cut off. I would certainly be having words with the young lady and that would be the last time she "borrowed" my horse.

 

[LittleMonster]

I'd be annoyed, she asked to hack not have a pony party...

And you agreed she could ride if she feed which she hasn't i see the girl in the wrong personally.

Hope your okay x

 

[Ladyinred]

When I was 19 I aved every penny I had and bought an Arab mare, comlete with long flowing mane and tail. I kept he with friends and had to e awa one weekend so their daughter looked after her (she was a BHSI so could be trusted.. I thought)

Came back and found her mane had been pulled to approx 3 inches or less and her tail chopped short. I walked away and cried.

 

[smokey]

Trust me, no one will ever ride my horse again unless I'm there! I normally would go ballistic, but my fuse is so short at the moment, i do t trust myself to keep control!

 

[Highlands]

I would be really annoyed

1) no business to touch her tail, I would be fuming if my cobs it highlands had their tails touched
2) hack involves going out on the roads not ted school
3) friends , why were they on your horse or the YO

Think you were being really kind and taken advantage of.

 

[Ceriann]

I wouldnt be happy - not just from a trust perspective or the fact that i try and ensure my girls are treated consistently etc - but also practically from an insurance perspective.

 

[myponyvic]

I would be fuming! The balloon would have gone up. There again, my temper is ridiculously short. She asked to take her for a hack, not to use her as the community pony! I think I'd be most annoyed about the fact she didn't feed her. My friend/colleague keeps asking to shave my ponies feathers off and to cut his tail...I promptly told him that if he touches my pony's legs or tail that there will be war.

 

[AmyMay]

I'd be incandescent!

 

[Cheshire Chestnut]

Woah I'd be livid!! Have you said anything to them?

I recently allowed a girl on my yard to ride my pony and she jumped him (I wouldn't have allowed that if she'd asked by the way!) and I found a large cut on his hock the day after. It looked like it had been there for a day or so, therefore I asked her if she had seen it and she said it wasn't there when she rode him. Ah well, I thought he must have done in the field afterwards, until l saw the photos on Facebook and oh look - there's his cut, all massive and weeping while her AND HER FRIEND ARE JUMPING HIM!! So either they saw it and chose to ignore it or they didn't even see it - I can't work out which is worse???!

So no one ever rides him now at all. If I can't ride him for a few days, then he has those days off. Selfish but he's mine and I think that people just take the p*** sometimes with things that aren't theirs!

 

[gingernut81]

I'd also be fuming. I would cancel the arrangement and take the tack home if kept at the yard so no-one could ride without you there. Horses are precious to us and I can't believe how much people take the P! I very much doubt she would like it if the situation was reversed.

 

[sheep]

Also wtf was the YO thinking getting on without your consent?! I'd be very cross with them too.

 

[Magnetic Sparrow]

If that was my horse I would have been extremely cross too. Changes what she's agreed to do with her, allowed randoms to ride her, not kept her half of the bargain, left your horse hungry and vandalised her tail. What was she thinking?

 

[Pearlsasinger]

I think you have done very well not to blow your top. I do understand though that you didn't want to end up with nowhere to keep your horse!
I can't understand how any of them thought that any of their behaviour was acceptable. Why would any-one cut someone else's horse's tail? And as for not feeding her when you expressly made this part of the arrangement.........

 

[Luce85]

I think you have done well not to have gone off on one.
It's one thing inviting other people to ride your horse, but to cut her tail and not feed her, I would be livid!!

IMO the yard owner should have known better, especially if she has been denied from riding the horse before!

 

[Tabbi]

I would be furious too ...... people should not take liberties with other peoples horses end of. I only allow one very good friend to ride my pony, and if I am honest I feel she does not push him enough when she is working him.... so I trust her thoroughly.
I would speak to that girl and tell her you are disappointed and why and leave it at that I am sure from that she would know she is not going to get another chance. And I would point out that I would tell exactly the same to everyone else so they all know where you stand !

 

[AmyMay]

Also wtf was the YO thinking getting on without your consent?! I'd be very cross with them too.

Almost more than anything, this.

 

[MerrySherryRider]

Totally unacceptable. The girl entrusted to borrow your horse let you down. Your YO let you down. And anyone else who had a 'go' on your horse was an idiot.
When life throws a spanner in the works and you need a bit of help, you find out who your friends are, and in my experience, it often isn't those people that you expect to be reliable.

 

[Sparkles]

I would be livid.

1) Insurance wouldn't have covered me for that.

2) No feed, unacceptable...you don't borrow someones horse and not put the chores into it in return.

3) Tail cutting. If one hair on my boy was touched, I would be livid regardless.

4) Total lack of repsect and trust returned for what was a nice gesture on your part.

 

[smokey]

I would be livid.

1) Insurance wouldn't have covered me for that.

2) No feed, unacceptable...you don't borrow someones horse and not put the chores into it in return.

3) Tail cutting. If one hair on my boy was touched, I would be livid regardless.

4) Total lack of repsect and trust returned for what was a nice gesture on your part.

this. She was expressly told that my horse was insured for her to ride, with my permission!

 

[smja]

You're completely right to be angry - I would be!

Whenever I've borrowed someone's horse, especially if they aren't there watching, I do exactly what I asked/they asked me to do and then text the owner to let them know how it went. I'm even more careful with them than I am my own!
As for cutting her tail....beyond belief. I think a word with her parents might be the way forward (how old is she?)

 

[smokey]

You're completely right to be angry - I would be!

Whenever I've borrowed someone's horse, especially if they aren't there watching, I do exactly what I asked/they asked me to do and then text the owner to let them know how it went. I'm even more careful with them than I am my own!
As for cutting her tail....beyond belief. I think a word with her parents might be the way forward (how old is she?)

she's 25!!! If she was a child, or a teenager she wouldn't have got the chance in the first place! The fact that i found out in fb really p****d me off, treating my horse as if she owned her!

 

[Meowy Catkin]

When I was 19 I saved every penny I had and bought an Arab mare, complete with long flowing mane and tail. I kept he with friends and had to be away one weekend so their daughter looked after her (she was a BHSI so could be trusted.. I thought)

Came back and found her mane had been pulled to approx 3 inches or less and her tail chopped short. I walked away and cried.

I would cry if someone pulled/cut my horses manes and tails too.

OP, you have every right to be upset about all three of your points (the extra riders, the tail cutting and the not feeding). Take your tack home and say that you wont be giving permission for anyone to ride her in future.

 

[Megibo]

I'd have had an absolute b fit !!

Not read all replies but I hope she is no longer allowed to ride your horse.
This is why I'd rather my horse have a few days off if I don't want to ride rather than ask anyone else to ride her.

 

[atropa]

I would be absolutely livid! Can't believe someone would think that was acceptable! Although bless your little mare for behaving so nicely for them all.

 

[twiggy2]

I would be more cross with YO